About the only thing missing will be Star staffers and celebs hawking papers on street corners to commemorate the grand occasion …
With local media tripping over each other trying to kiss up to the new IKEA store here, it’s somewhat surprising that nobody’s hinted at what to expect on opening day when the Swedes throw out the first meatball in Merriam.
The $64 million question: will IKEA draw more opening day than the Royals?
Guess we’ll see, and if anything is to be gleaned from the grand opening of IKEA’s 39th store opening in Miami two weeks ago here’s what’s likely to be fueling pandemonium when the doors open at 9 a.m. Wednesday:
The first 39 adults in line in Miami got a free EKTORP three-seat sofa, probably in white since all the other colors one might actually want add $100 to $200 to the price. So good luck keeping it clean. Since Ikea Merriam is the company’s 40th store, I’m betting that there’ll be 40 of these babies doled out.
The next 100 adults – remember, kids are “disposable” at IKEA – received a free POÄNG armchair. These babies go out the door for $69 and appear to include the cushion of your choice (unlike the one Pitch top gun Steve Vockrodt bought in Denver that doubled in price once he learned that the cushion was extra). And the first 100 disposable kids get a five buck FAMNIG heart-shaped soft toy.
And just to make things more interesting (and ramp up the body count), the first 2,500 people (not adults, not kids) in line got a “mystery prize envelope,” with either a $10 to $250 gift card or a buy-one-get-one-free coupon for either an IKEA hotdog, frozen yogurt or cinnamon bun.
Good luck fighting your way through the throngs of senior citizens that pack IKEA cafeterias for the cheap eats.
Shoppers who’s birthday is on Wednesday got a $30.50 gift card with a valid government ID.
There’s more…
On the second day, the first 39 customers got a free $299 SULTAN HALLEN queen mattress. The next 100 got a $59 certificate for free delivery that day only.
And on day three – let’s call it First Friday – the first 39 people were given 52 certificates for IKEA’s 15-piece meatball plate, free of charge. The next 100 people in line got an IKEA Food tote bag and voucher to fill the bag with items from IKEA’s Swedish Food market.
The first 305 people in line got a free frozen yogurt worth a buck and disposable kids 12 and under got a free kids combo meal.
Oh yeah, you have to be in line by 9 a.m. each day, somebody in your group has to be 18 or older and you can only leave the line for 10 minute smoking or bathroom breaks. Family or friends can bring you food and drink, no sleeping in your car, “no obscenities, alcohol, weapons, violence, or drugs of any sort” allowed, no “barbecue equipment” – note to IKEA, we call it tailgating – sleeping bags and chairs must be returned to your car (that you were not allowed to park there, remember?) by 7 a.m. each day and you have to sign a liability and publicity waiver.
In other words, you want want to consult an attorney before queuing up for the free shit.
And don’t even think about wearing your Nebraska Furniture Mart tee shirt. Displaying the logo of another business while in line is considered a fashion faux pas and is verboten.
Anyway, look for something similar to be announced later today or tomorrow is my guess.
I don’t get all this hoopla about a store that sells boiled horse testicles and crappy, cheap furniture that you have to put together with instructions that might as well have been written in Aramaic.
Take a number, dude.
Although the horse meat scandal was in Europe only, I think
I’m with the dude. It’s just a store. With stuff that you buy.
The same people that have time to wait in line for that stuff are the only ones that have time to be on a jury. Scary.
If you have never eaten horse meat, don’t knock it. Lobster is merely a saltwater roach.
I haven’t seen a populous this exited about a new business since Hooter’s opened in Reading, PA.
This too shall pass…
Those Swedish meatballs Joyce Smith of The Star made such a big deal about a year ago sucked pretty bad by my measure.
Talk about Mystery Meat.
Who knows? Maybe they’re tastier with horse???
Hey I have had a brain sandwich so why not horse balls?
Passed on the duck’s feet and pig stomach at the Amish buffet.
Horse oysters, sir. Horse oysters.
Hearne, you certainly are getting behind in getting news out. The plans for the Merriam grand opening were announced/sent out back on Sept. 3:
http://info.ikea-usa.com/merriam/pdf/IKEA-Merriam-Grand-Opening-Rules-Regulations.pdf?src=on_em_gmfm_3615_374
Ah but it hadn’t been covered in the local media.
You think just because an obscure website or announcement is made that everybody on earth instantly knows all the details?
There are tons of news stories that break on small sites, twitter,Facebook, etc that don’t become widely known until a news or media entity “breaks” the news to a larger audience.
Just like Joyce Smith at the Star did yesterday, as well.
Actually, I was aware of the giveaways a week or two back but hadn’t gotten around to writing it yet. So it wasn’t exactly like a race to tell people what they’d get and the rules. I’ll have a few more thoughts on things later today.
In case you missed it, I also added a bit more information, context and my commentary- which was not on the rules site.
So if you had all this information “a week or two back,” why did you decide to focus the story on what Miami got two weeks ago and provide a guess as to “what’s likely” to be in store for Kansas City???
If you had all the KC information previously, it would have made more sense to write about the KC plans instead of rehashing what happened in Miami…
You can’t say Shitterbaums here?
So much for being uncensored.
Seriously?
You want me to put that on KCC’s verboten words list?
C’mon, jack!
whats the good news? kc gets another tax producing company!!!!
Merriam could become the new legends!!!!!
glaze is opening his new comedy club and overland park is excited. Could you
make your sign bigger (lol)….bring slayton and black…and all the great
comedians back…but most importantly get thevflower pot bread cooking.
and he’ll fill that parking lot makingit impossible for parking at
the taco bell/mcdonalds/pizza hut triplex.
Metcalf south will be renovated.
people are smiling again.
the royals are relevant in late September
the chiefs are having problems…
all in all…its a great time for this city….
and that’s what’s important.
no other city I’d live in. with all its downside…the greatest city in America….
sports are important…but they don’t make the city.
hopefully chiefs can come back.
kc is on the move again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
I’m not sure that IKEA will catapult Merriam anywhere near the Legends, Wild Man
Again, the IKEA stores I visited in LA were doing a healthy business but aside from the cheap-as-horsemeat Swedish meatballs and chocolate cake it was just another Nebraska Furniture Mart sans the electronics and entertainment software.
Then again, there are lots of IKEA stores in Californian, this lone one in our area could spark lots of furniture shopping specific visits to KC to check it out.. Just imagine if we had the only Walmart in the region.
tht center was dead…ikea could draw more retail…
joco is on fire…
how about this new top golf place coming to 107th
and nalll….have heard incredible things about it…
inside golf!!!!!!!! great food and drink…huge building..
check on it! thanks.
Interesting…
Golf is kind of a fading sport these days though, isn’t it?
Funny how tennis in the 70s and 80s caught fire -suddenly everybody wanted to play and it was hard to get a court – then…nothing. Back to the country club set and high school.
Same for golf. Growing up the only people I knew that watched golf were my dad and his friends. This improbably an exaggeration, but to the average sports fan it was like watching curling or table tennis.
Then it became huge, they built waaaaay too many golf courses around the country and now it appears largely to be headed back to the country clubs and the duffers, guys like the late Jerry Heaster at The Star.
not a golf course…its a huge complex with all
types of gamesaround golf….
fastest growing co. in America….big in texas…
huge!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I didn’t think it was a golf course, I thought it was a mega golf store.
Sounds like a lot more