Hearne: This Week’s Comments Section Greatest Hits (Redux)

photo by mark webb

photo by mark webb

Longtime readers of may recall the early days of KC Confidential

Including the occasions I turned flipped the spotlight around and pointed it at the denizens of our fledgling comments section. It was an exercise in alternately saluting and grimacing at the heights to which they soared and the depths to which they sank.

Because sometimes it’s hard to do them justice given the limitations of the medium.

Take yesterday, when the newbaum turk wrote, The biggest loss is Charly Arnault moving back to Indy. She was the hottest girl on local news here.”

Not being a local television news kinda guy I was curious.



Turns out the turk knew his shit – that is aside from misspelling her name – it’s Arnolt not Arnault.  self-described “lover of food, fitness, sports, shopping, and traveling” the Indy native is alive and well and vamping it up on Indianapolis Fox 59 News.

Hey and lest Arnolt be relegated to the slag heap of lightly-regarded TV news hotties, let the record show she graduated summa cum laude from American University in Washington, DC with a degree in broadcast journalism, with studies in Spanish and criminal justice.

Then again her tweet on the Washington Redskins mascot and name controversy wasn’t exactly scholarly.

“What do you all think about the name Redskins?,” Arnolt tweeted. “I get it could offend, but does it actually? Enough to change the team’s name?”

Speaking of news hotties…

Screen shot 2014-01-18 at 5.45.32 PM

A crasser commenter added: ‘And don’t forget Tess Koppleman (sic) is now gone, along with her big ole titties. Had a baby and never came back from maternity leave and made it official recently.”

True enough…the maternity and job part – that is.

“I packed up my desk at Fox 4 yesterday,” Koppelman tweeted earlier this week. “After more than 12 years, I’ve decided to call it quits.”

In late November Koppelman posted a pic of her month old son, Elliott…wearing a mustache and sucking a binky. Cute!

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In my “High and the Mighty” column about a very young Crosby Kemper Jr. and his wife returning from their honeymoon on a harrowing, transoceanic flight – as depicted in the movie based on real life – comments section habitue Chuck noted that actress Claire Trevor had starred in the movie.

MV5BMTcxNTg3NDAxNl5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwMTc5MzAzMQ@@._V1_SX640_SY720_Raising the $64 million question of who played Crosby?

Hint: it wasn’t High & Mighty lead star John Wayne. Nope, the Big C was played by lightly regarded actor John Smith who died in 1995 of cirrhosis of the liver. Kemper’s wife Cynthia Kemper was played by actress Karen Sharpe. who married legendary filmmaker Stanley Kramer and manages his estate.

Kemper may have played a bit role the movie and the book, but he loomed plenty large on Kansas City’s big stage.  Despite the fact that after his first honeymoon return flight, Kemper avoided flying whenever humanly possible.

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640_wild_goose_2006_truck_load_shotIn Mark Valentine‘s ditty about the Cowtown’s geese problem, Chuck added that the fowl were also a nuisance to golfers at Swope Park.

“They will chase you on the golf course during mating season,” Chuck wrote. “Ya gotta use your clubs to hold them back using the ‘lion and a chair’ strategy. It is pretty funny. If I could hit the ball straight I wouldn’t have that problem.

“I am no hunter and have never eaten Goose, but I hear they are greasy. I guess it is all up to the cook. They really did shoot them by the hundreds in Swope Park some time ago. Swope Park, famous for murders of crows and gaggles of geese.”

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The Glaze

“Glaza…when will you realize you know nothing about football and you
change your tune when the wind changes. Your phony won loss record is ridiculous and you know nothing about football period,” wrote on-again, off again Scribe lover/hater Harley. “You were wrong about the chiefs/royals/tigers/ku…..How much more can you find to be totally wrong about?”

Glazer’s non-pugilistic response:

“Harley old pal. First off you are right I was wrong about MU…but later saw that and praised them for a great season. When you predict things in sports sometimes you miss, that’s why they have a sportsbook in Vegas.

“As for the Chiefs I felt pre season they were a 7-9 or 9-7 team…this was off as well, but in reality not by much at seasons end they were a 2-6 team, not so good.

“As for the Royals I said over .500 not a playoff team, that was correct…KU is the franchise that I feel is by far our area’s best, I praised Bill Self and his squad an NBA type team. So how is that wrong?

“I talk sports on two blogs, radio and even TV at times…so somebody thinks I know something, sorry you don’t. Harley I forgive you. Remember to each his own.

“What is sad and insane are these comment people who want me to die and my friends, damn, what can you say about that? You can see why a fellow might get upset, me in this case.”

Harley’s response:

“Glaze…I agree….the threats …the hate….the vile comments about you and the family…..way out of bounds. But…you put yourself out there in public as a public
figure and you take the heat with the good….If you don’t want those losers saying that stuff….it’s time to pull down the curtain.”

At which point Richard Cranium invited Glazer to crawl into a hole and die.

Glazer’s response :

“I’m always curious Richard as to why someone I don’t know would be so damn hateful and want me to die. Why? What is it you think I’ve done that is so terrible and hurtful to you or anyone else. Explain. How do I drain on anyone? WTF are you talking about?

“I am just shocked in so many ways that there are people out there like you who act this way for no reason. You sound like a nut job. I’m a blight on humanity. Really, why, how? You want me and my friends to die! Really do you know my friends as well. I’d like to think I have some pretty decent friends, Hearne for one…You need to look in the mirror sir before you attack a man you don’t know and really know nothing about. Have a great day.

“And as I remember it wasn’t this a story on the Chiefs? Where do these crazy people come from. My God.”

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1976_campaign_flying_discThe Stomper weighed in with a measure of political gravitas on Jack Poessiger‘s, No chance in hell will KC get the Republican Convention in 2016 column:

“One potential factor, albeit a small one, is whether the GOP thinks they can get a bit of a local bounce and tilt that state to the Republican side,” the Stomper reasoned. “Of all the cities you listed, really only Ohio and Florida were close in 2012 and that might give just a little edge to Orlando or the Ohio cities listed.

“The GOP has a much smaller draw than do the Democrats. No way KC could handle a Democratic Convention but the GOP does fall within our wheelhouse.”

Added voice of reason Craig Thrustmore:

“Read the bid requirements. The RNC wants the city to basically pay for everything. They want free security, free medical and contingency coverage, free run of the place. It will be an endless sea of Brooks Brothers suits causing shut down of the entire downtown and midtown area. The city is griping about $6 million shortfall in the budget but they can find $150,000,000 for a train and money to give away to the RNC?”

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1329414250464_5749300Texting during movies has always been a hot topic on KCC

Usually with me taking on all comers and taking it up the you-know-what – starting with Jack P – in support of the discreet use of cellphones and texting in public places like movie theaters, funerals and churches.

The prevailing thinking among slightly older readers and film fanatics being something akin to, off with their heads for people guilty of checking their phones when they get a text during a movie.

Well, this past week, the Death to Texters crowd finally got their wish.

That after a 71 year-old ex cop offed a 40-something father for texting his three year-old daughter’s babysitter during the previews on Senior Monday at a Florida movieplex.

Naturally, I defended the dead dad – along with stylist Lauren Euston – while the comments crowd chewed us up and spat us out…as usual.

“Beatdowns are good enough for the texter if it’s during the previews,” reasoned Hot Carl. “You need to save your bullets for the asshat that texts during the feature.”

“Right on Carl, right on!” echoed The Dude.

“If your 3 1/2 year old can’t make it until the movie is over, or if Mom is checking out, maybe you should wait for it to come out on DVD,” snapped OPKS Jimbo. “Posessiger is right Euston is wrong. More reasons to not pay to see movies in the theater.”

“So there’s no possible way to manage your personal crises without a cell phone?” asked Paracelsus. “That is amazing. How did the human species survive all these years?”

That’s funny, I could have sworn that I already addressed that point in the story. The answer being, the same way we survived before movie theaters.

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gty_dick_clark_new_years_wy_120418_wgBrandon Leftridge usually – but not always – gets a pass from the comments section haters. Not counting the time he ripped Dick Clark a new one after he died two years ago.

Remember that one?

“There you were, struggling through yet another year-end telecast, making us all uncomfortable,” leftridge wrote of Clark. “Godbless. All we wanted was another pre-midnight swig from the bottle of Mad Dog, and there you were, reminding us of our secret/disgrace grandpa.

“God-fucking-damn-bless-you, Dick Clark, World’s Oldest Teenager, or whatever in the fuck you were called.

“You were worthless, quite honestly. A trained chimp could have lived your life from the $25,000 Pyramid to your pointless mic-throws on New Year’s Eve, you did nothing.”

Causing the smartman to lay a little pipe.

“Deja vu all over again,” smartman began. “As I recall Randy Raley started it off with a brilliant post telling Brandon how wrong he was. I agreed with what Randy said. Glazer chimed in telling Brandon he was an idiot and that even though he has fake hair it’s the best fake hair and he gets lots of hotties cause he’s a stud. I think Chuck and Mark X may have posted something poignant too.”

But back to this week…

Like I said, nobody messes much with Brandon because he’s too good – a great writer who makes well reasoned and often humorous points – and a guy who doesn’t take himself too seriously. Then again, there’s always Harley.

“Lefty…liked the last type of article…and the craigslist
stuff was hilarious…bring it back and go big time,” the H Man began. “Listen to Harley!!!!!!!”

“Uh, yeah, listen to harlinator flap his wings and squawk like a dodo!” the dude shot back.

That’s all for this week’s installment of, As the Comments Section Turns.

Stay tuned…





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7 Responses to Hearne: This Week’s Comments Section Greatest Hits (Redux)

  1. chuck says:

    I miss smarty.


  2. hot harley says:

    thanks hearne for the ink…I didn’t realize I played such a big part in this
    blogs comment sections.
    I disagree with glaza on the sports…and the numbers asnd his comments
    bear out my disagreement. Tahts a fair disagreement…we can argue over
    his lack of experience in football analysis and his fuzzy math but its not
    to be taken as anything personal…not hate..or vile comments…or
    even attempts to personally attack him or his family or hurt his business.
    I have been glazas biggest supporter…look at my total work…and no one
    has defended him more on the real issues than I have.
    Just go thru my comments…on here and on tkc.
    However…you published that dispciable comment about some nut case wanting
    glaza to die along with his friends. That is absolutely ridiculous that you would
    let that stand. And that he had to answer that comment as he did.
    Some friend you are….glaza has provided you with more content thqn anyone
    on this blog and before in the star. To print that incindiery comment that foments
    a possible criminal behavior on some freaking nutcases part is beyond reproach.
    It wasv borderline illegal to print that comment and leave it on for the
    crackpots who read this blog.
    why did you do it? for shock value? maybe this nut has a gun…or maybe
    he’s going to go after glaza…whatever the case your decision to leave that
    comment up is outrageous.
    as far as lefty…the guy has some incredible talent. I mean some of his
    stuff is really really funny and creative. Trying to get away from the stuff
    he does well is wrong…he’s funny…youong…has a funny perspective and
    the craigslist stuff was some of the funniest6 stuff I’ve read on any local
    and as far asglaza taking these serious comments to heart…they are getting
    worse and worse…advocating his death. We don’t know who wrote tis
    but obviously some sick individual who might have alterior motives.
    It’s obvious you don’t have a policy in place to decide the apporporiate
    style ofr comments to allow on your blog. maybe youshould.
    as far as my comments…usually are backed with info/facts/etc.
    that prove my point.
    dodo dude and the rest of these failures can only try to use old beat up
    lines that make them look like idiots.
    truth is …glaza should stop his writings…the comments are getting
    scarier and scarier as time goes on. There are nuts out there
    with scary ideas.
    Glaza/myself and even Wilson have expressed concern at the lack
    of control blog owners have over their comment sections. You better
    take control….those nut cases out there are numersous and you never
    know what they’ll do or attempt.
    as always…your friend…

  3. Hot Carl says:

    Wow, a mention from Hearne. I guess I’ll let you check one text at the movies without reprisal.

    • Stomper says:

      I too, am honored by the mention.

      More impressed to learn that Arnolt attended my alma mater. She studied a bit harder , and obviously held up a lot better than I did.

    • admin says:

      Attaboy, Hot Carl…

      The longest journey begins with the first step!

  4. Paracelsus says:

    Not to burst the collective bubble, but I think there are so few commenters that just about anyone would make the cut.

    • admin says:

      Ah but very few of the comments by the however few rose to the occasion…

      The point being, that often the comments are missed my many readers who breeze thru but a single time and/or warrant further followup.

Comments are closed.