Jack Goes Confidential: ‘Don Jon’ Spanks the Monkey

DON JONDON JON is the All American—make that AVERAGE American— guy…

He’s dedicated to family, friends, his church and women.

He’s also obsessed with porn!

Actor Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s daily routine is finding just the right clips from his favorite porn sites. It’s as normal to him as taking a daily vitamin.

Let’s give credit where credit is due, Jon’s breakdown of women, porn stars, sexual positions and, for that matter, ALL things porn just might make you uncomfortable. All while your covering your face laughing.

Think Sex And The City—-for guys.

Men will love this crude, rude and very funny comedy. Women? Not so much.

Well, things change when sexy Scarlett Johansson enters Jon’s life and he falls head over heels for the gorgeous blonde.

Joseph-Gordon-Levitt-and-Scarlett-Johansson-in-Don-JonBut when she catches him continuing with his porn addiction she calls it quits.

Is that the end?

Not by a long shot. There’s much older Julianne Moore to help re-direct his sex drive.

A special nod to Tony Danza as Jon’s rough, tough dad who wouldn’t mind getting some of that Scarlett Johansson action for himself.

And the local priest who Jon visits every Sunday to confess his past week’s sins to. He describes them in immaculate detail.

No problem. A few ‘Hail Marys’ and Jon’s good to go for another week of horndogging.

The running joke throughout the film are the cutaways of used Kleenex tissues being tossed into the trash can.

movies-don-jon-still-18Here’s the clincher.

Levitt not only stars in this movie. He also wrote and directed it.

As in he was able to direct his OWN sex scenes.

Not a bad days work.

Make no mistake, what we’ve got here is a hard R rated movie. And it gets going right with the first scene.

DON JON scores a spanking a C+ grade.

(Reviewed at Screenland Armour theater)

 

JACK GOES TO THE MOVIES: Friday mornings at 6:40 a.m. and 8:40 a.m. on NewsRadio KMBZ & AM / And anytime on Time Warner-Cable’s ‘K.C. ON DEMAND,’ Channel 411.

 

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3 Responses to Jack Goes Confidential: ‘Don Jon’ Spanks the Monkey

  1. the dude says:

    You use the term ‘obssessed with porn’ like that’s a bad thing.
    My kleenex tissues and I take exception to that.

  2. Craig Glaysure says:

    Don John is a loser wanna be. I look 10 times better than him and he never wrote a book. My movie will be 10 times better than this piece of crap, even Jack gave it a C.
    I should do a non-champions DVD series and make him the star of my first one, loser.
    Scarlet Johannson, Julianna Moore? Both are 3’s at best, I don’t date anything but 9-10’s. And they are old, has been hags. Anything over 23 isn’t worth my time. You think this guy ever dated a stripper? I doubt it.
    And I hear this loser john dude doesn’t even live in Malibu but he does drive one, I have a Lotus. I give it a F-. He wishes he could be me, but that makes him no different than you other haters.

  3. balbonis moleskine says:

    Wow, just read the plot summary on Wikipedia. This movie looks like it cuts pretty close to the bone for men and women aged 25-35. I can now see why the reviews seem to be real polarizing, the major themes probably aren’t relevant to anyone over a certain age.

    I’ve got a few Don-esque buddies and I’ve sadly dated too many Esther types.

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