Tag Archives: Kelly Urich

Starbeams: Ray Rice, Harassment KC Style & Chiefs ‘Wonderland’

What Ray Rice did in that elevator was wrong on so many levels.  But am I the only one who thinks the elevator company deserves credit for the door not closing on her head?     ******* Kansas City, Missouri is considering a … Continue reading

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Hearne: ‘The Point’ Most Listened to Station in KC August Radio Ratings

A pair of surprises top an otherwise sleepy August radio ratings book… For starters, Entercom’s The Point 99.7 FM has come into it’s own and is now the most listened to station in the Kansas City market with a cume of 528,800 … Continue reading

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Starbeams: Death of Joan Rivers & Free Speech, Red Friday, David Lawrence Naked

Ten years from now there will be no comics like Joan Rivers because the world will be so politically correct, our vocabulary will be reduced to 50 words that don’t offend people.                   … Continue reading

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Starbeams: Dumb Ways to Say ‘Missouri,” Virgin Kid Corral & Robin Williams

  I’m traveling to Ferguson, Missouri this weekend to protest…Governor Jay Nixon saying Missouruh, instead of Missouri.                                               … Continue reading

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Starbeams: Loni Does 69, Jeff Gordon & Amtrak Do 43, Sprint Flounders

The good news!  Sprint is about to name a new C.E.O. The bad:  It’s that Royals fan from South Korea.                                         … Continue reading

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Starbeams: ‘Slawgate’ @ The Uptown & Timberlake Upstages Prez

I think we all learned about one pressing issue facing the nation from President Obama during his visit to Kansas City:  If you want slaw, never show up late to Arthur Bryant’s.                     … Continue reading

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Starbeams: Snakebit in Lenexa, Top 5 Ways to Spot a Joco Rattlesnake

Fifteen  year-old Roy Christiansen had quite a surprise while walking down a sidewalk in Lenexa when a rattlesnake bit his leg!  He received 11 vials of anti-venom and spent two days at Children’s Mercy Hospital.
Experts say snakes are attracted to rodents being attracted to our lawn sprinklers during this hot, dry summer.

The Top 5 Ways to Spot a Johnson County Rattlesnake:

#5.  It hibernates in Fiji.

#4.  Natural environment includes traffic islands.

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Starbeams: Burrito Bonanza, American Idol Exit, (Almost) Free Hugs & Royal Ripoff

People camped out for the opening of Freebirds World Burrito in Mission. Folks were in line Tuesday night for the Thursday morning opening.  Most of the people in line thought they were camping out for a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert.

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Steven Tyler is exiting as judge of American Idol. He says he finally ran out of rhymes that were cool in 1970.

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Starbeams: Did D Bowe Fumble? Hot Weather Meets TV Hottie, Everybody Yahoo & Aretha

The 3 p.m. deadline for Dwayne Bowe to sign with the Chiefs NFL passed with no word on whether or not a long-term deal had been reached.  Dwayne tried to reach a deal, but it slipped through his hands.

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Triple digit heat returns to Kansas City this week.  The weather has made me hot, sticky and out of breath – and that’s just from watching Karli Ritter on Fox 4.

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Starbeams: KC Boos, Tom Cruise Divorce, Katy Perry’s Boobs & Donald Rumsfeld to Dole

Many national viewers were surprised to see Kansas City fans booing Robinson Cano at the Home Run Derby Monday.  What they don’t realize is, for 20 years Kauffman Stadium has had a monopoly on booing.

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The booing continued on the red carpet on the Country Club Plaza.  Unfortunately, Sacha Baron Cohen wasn’t able to attend the event.

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Billy Butler is having a blast during his first All-Star appearance.  Mainly because Royal bacon blue hot dogs are free to the players.

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Starbeams: Royals 1st Inning Stretch, Foreplay in San Diego & Romney Tops Obama in Ks.

 

Security is ready for the All-Star Game.  For example, several guards will be placed near the exits of Kauffman Stadium to keep Royals fans from leaving after the traditional first inning exit.

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A San Diego fireworks show accidentally launched its 20-minute set of fireworks in 15 seconds.  What a coincidence? This happens to me during foreplay!

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Starbeams: Fox Anchor Gets Rouses Kelly, Royals Fans on Hot Seat & Bazooka’s Makeover

Erin Andrews said she hopes her move to Fox Sports will help her grow as a journalist.  She’s always helped me grow as a viewer.

 

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Little known fact: New Mexican President, Enrique Pena Nieto is one letter away from having the initials ESPN.

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Starbeams: Anderson Cooper Comes Out, Tom & Katie Split, Michigan DUIs, Joco Sex

 

CNN’s Anderson Cooper finally admitted….he really is Ellen DeGeneres.

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It was sad to hear about Katie and Tom but will their daughter Suri keep her job as the voice that screws up my iPhone?

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Starbeams: Janet Jackson Super Stunt, George Toma, Microsoft @ Oak Park & Bruce Chen

A federal judge finally threw out the Janet Jackson Super Bowl wardrobe malfunction case.  Thanks for the timely response, replied no one who worked for CBS after 2004.

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Former groundskeeper George Toma will become the 25th member of the Royals Hall of Fame at a ceremony planned for August 31st at the K.  Unfortunately, George had the team’s highest On Base Percentage from 1986-1995.

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Starbeams: It Was So Hot in Kansas City Yesterday That…

It was so hot….

******* The All-Star Game has been moved to the Crown Center Ice Terrace.

******* I saw Larry Moore in a tank top.

******* The Humane Society is upset because I left my dog inside the HOUSE.

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Starbeams: Turtle Sex, Snakes on a Plain, Fat Cops in Mission & Getting ‘Faced’

Scientists found a fossil of two turtles having sex that’s 47 million years old. Completely related, I once made out in a Shell station.   

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Residents of Crimson Ridge development in western Shawnee were shocked to learn the park that backs up to their property will become home to imported snakes as part of a conservation area.  The good news; people jogging through the park will easily surpass their target pulse rate.

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The nation of Pakistan is cracking down on obese policemen.  Or as we call them here in Mission, policemen.

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Starbeams: Cordish Plan Down the Sewer, DMV Days, New Math & Chocolate Love

The Cordish Co. is planning a $70 million downtown project with a 23-story tower as the centerpiece.  They also want a 25 year tax break.  Thankfully, our $3.6 billion crumbling sewage problem is well-funded, so the timing’s perfect.

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Summer is officially here.  June 21 is the longest day of the year….unless you’re at a Kansas DMV.  Then it’s even longer.

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Starbeams: Retro Radio ‘Release’ Week, McCartney Does Bieber & Boulevard’s ‘Love Child’

New albums have been released this week from Neneh Cherry, Richard Marx, Smashing Pumpkins, Fiona Apple, Jimmy Buffett and Lita Ford.  I don’t know about you, but I’m ready to crank up ZZ99!

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Paul McCartney turned 70 this week.  He is the only 70 year-old I know who can pull off the Justin Bieber hairdo.

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Starbeams: The Top 5 Ways to Spot a Kansas City Terrorist

Federal officials have arrested a Kansas City businessman for allegedly being part of an al-Qaida terror cell.

Top 5 Ways to Spot a Kansas City Terrorist:

#5. He gripes about having to drive 45 minutes north of town just so he can fly an airplane into a building.

#4. Drives around town all day looking for something worthy of blowing up.

#3. Lives in a cave called Hunt Subtropolis.

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Starbeams: KCI, Why? Rockville’s Horses, Madonna Goes Senile & Royals Wave Brewers

A plan to replace Terminal A at KCI with one giant and modernized terminal has been presented to city officials. Terminals B and C could be turned into office space. Still no word on when they plan to build a terminal near where people live.

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The city of Rockville, Missouri is embracing the prospect of a horse slaughtering plant being located in their town.  One hundred and fifty people packed a city council meeting this week to voice their support for the idea.  You might say they’re sticking together like glue.

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