KC Confidential | Hearne Christopher, Uncensored

Sutherland: Cool Guys, Class Acts & Ruling Class Heroes

Posted on March 17, 2014 by Dwight D. Sutherland, Jr.

Masten Gregory @ the 1965 German Grand Prix

When I left Nallwood Junior High in Overland Park for Pembroke Country Day almost 50 years ago, I felt a sense of liberation and elation…

I was leaving the land of Beatle boots, I.D. bracelets, and tight pants (plus mullet-style long hair). I was going to a place of madras, khakis, and tweed jackets (plus obligatory rep. stripe ties). I was abandoning a place where intelligence and literacy were suspect for a place where men of action were expected to be intellectuals. (The headmaster, Calvin Atwood, was a decorated paratrooper in WWII as well as a recognized poet.)

Above all else, I noticed a whole change of attitude, a sea change in one’s world view that went with my new surroundings. It’s only years later that I realize the style and sensibility of the new place were imbibed tacitly. You got with the program quickly because of the examples set by those who came before, the upperclassmen and the alums. (The school still reflected the ethos of the prior 30 years.)

Here are a few of the role models: Continue reading →

Posted in Dwight D. Sutherland, Jr. | 16 Comments

Paul Wilson: Westboro Baptist’s Fred Phelps About to Assume Room Temperature

Posted on March 17, 2014 by Paul Wilson

Time wounds all heels…

Fred Phelps, the 84-year old “preacher” of Topeka’s Westboro Baptist “church” – if I may use those two terms – is about to meet his maker. Phelps hate filled little cult was established in 1955 and became a household name by picketing funerals, churches and businesses with signs attacking gays, Jews, soldiers and anyone else who fit their too-off-base-for-words theology.

God Hates Fags; Phelps’ version of John 3:16.

Rumor has it, Phelps was excommunicated from his own flock last summer, but no one seems to be able to fully confirm that. Your well-coiffed scribe called the church offices to ask that very question today and was told; “Sir, internal church affairs are not discussed with anyone other than church members!”

I then asked if, in his later days, maybe Phelps had mellowed and was no longer vile enough to retain his membership in good standing at Westboro Baptist, at which time I was promptly hung up on.

Apparently he was in good health until this month, at which time he was moved into Midland Hospice House where he stopped eating and drinking. I called Midland and spoke to Jessica who told me she could confirm nothing, but I could speak with Karren Weichert, their CEO. I’ve left a voice mail for Weichert, but I’m not betting on a return call; their phones are likely ringing off the hook with questions about our Near Dead Fred. Continue reading →

Posted in Paul Wilson | 45 Comments

Valentine: The Deal With The Devil

Posted on March 17, 2014 by Mark Valentine

Original art by Mark valentine

It is not always as dramatic as a Steven King novel, but a deal with The Devil always takes an evil twist in the end…

In the lawmaking business, they use the phrase “Sin Tax” when they make those deals. And there’s a recent evil twist on a current pact with “Old Scratch.” Because the income needed to fund education and veterans benefits is down. So cue the sinister background music as I reveal the culprit; that fewer people are gambling in Missouri Casinos.

The simple fact is Missouri gets money two different ways from casino gambling. The state gets a fee each time a patron walks onto the gaming floor and the state gets a cut of the overall action. Part of the per-head fee funds the Missouri Veterans Commission. And part of the tax on overall revenues goes toward public education.

The Kansas City mayor when Kansas City casinos first arrived was Emanuel Cleaver. And somehow, this is a man who has been involved in making several “Satan Sandwiches,” as he likes to call them. Continue reading →

Posted in Mark Valentine | 12 Comments

Hearne: Chippendales Descecrate Legends, Local Women Come Unglued

Posted on March 17, 2014 by Hearne Christopher Jr.

Ever wonder what it might be like to take the measure of an all-girl assemblage of horny housewives, errant strippers and girls-next-door gone wild?

Wonder no more because yours truly took one for the team last Thursday, when the Chippendales “50 Shades of Men” show descended on Stanford’s in the wilds of KCK. Continue reading →

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | 17 Comments

Hearne: Forget Kansas, Iowa State Tops Big 12 Tourism Party Slag Heap

Posted on March 16, 2014 by Hearne Christopher Jr.

The secret to the Big 12 basketball tournament’s success in KC?

Not KU’s 80,000-plus strong alumni base in Kansas City. Nor K-State’s, and not Mizzou’s paltry 26,000 alums.

Nope, when it comes to propping up the Big 12 tourney (and fostering tourism) the undisputed champ is none other than lowly Iowa State.

“Oh, Iowa State’s the money,” says Stanford & Sons main man Craig Glazer. “Most people in Kansas City don’t know that. And Kansas losing will actually help local restaurants and bars, because otherwise KU fans would have stayed him and watched the championship game on TV.”

Forget about tourism from the other Big 12 teams. Continue reading →

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | 8 Comments

New Jack City: The Good, The Bad & The Pissy

Posted on March 16, 2014 by Jack Poessiger

I’m a Virgo and I’m not apologizing…

Virgos are defined as being picky, exact, critical, methodical with great attention to detail. Which is why I’ve decided to get real bitchy today about the little things on the local television newscasts that really annoy me.

Sure they seem insignificant to you. But to me—hey—remember I’m a Virgo.

KCTV, Channel 5—

It really takes a lot of gall for local Channel 5 anchors to introduce a news package they’ve picked up from the network and introduce with, “And here’s KCTV’s (insert name of reporter).”

Which makes it sound like it’s KCTV’s reporter doing the story instead of CBS.

Of course the jig us up at the end of the piece when the report ends with “This is (Joe Blow), CBS News.” Continue reading →

Posted in Jack Poessiger | 3 Comments

Donnelly: Last Second Drama Burns Sporting Again

Posted on March 16, 2014 by Matthew Donnelly

You know it’s a big game when Marlon Wayans is in the house…

Wayans was in town to promote his new movie Haunted House 2. Unfortunately, Sporting Kansas City couldn’t harness that Wayans energy for most of the game, providing the sold out home opener crowd with some unflattering play until the last few minutes of the game. That’s when Sporting finally got on the board via an Aurelien Collin header off a corner.

But just like last week at Seattle, the boys in blue couldn’t hold on. Dallas earned a free kick in the 90th minute about 25 yards out and played a curling ball toward the back post where an unmarked Matt Hedges finished the play. If Hedges hadn’t gotten to the ball, there were at least two other Dallas players right with him that could have made a play on it.

“It’s unacceptable and it’s not who we are,” remarked an obviously pissed Peter Vermes afterwards. “I’m not happy and the guys know it. It’s not who we are.” Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Comment

Hearne: Power & Light Beer Sales Take Nose Dive Thanks to Big 12, Mizzou

Posted on March 14, 2014 by Hearne Christopher Jr.

You wouldn’t know a guy named, Harley, would you?

As if the Power & Light District doesn’t have enough problems…

Lawsuits claiming racism, diminished business with ramped up competition from Westport, Waldo and South Johnson County.

Comes now more bad news in the form of first time ever beer sales at Sprint Center during Big 12 basketball games and a seriously depleted fan turnout owing to the defections of longtime Big 12 stalwarts like Missouri, Nebraska and Colorado – especially Mizzou.
Continue reading →

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | 23 Comments

Hearne: Pitch Website Goes Dark, Listed for Sale

Posted on March 14, 2014 by Hearne Christopher Jr.

You got it, you sell it, you still got it…

And no, we’re not talking about sex, but rather The Pitch website, which earlier today – alarmingly – went dark and was replaced by a Go Daddy website for sale sign.

That’s what a number of KC Confidential readers reported shortly after 7 a.m.

“Uh-oh,” said one startled Pitch reader. “Have you checked (their site) today? Redirects to Go Daddy with instructions on how to buy it, since it expired on 3/13. What’s happening??”

Given the sorry state of the print and the diminished performance of The Pitch in recent years, naturally there was room for concern.

Could this be the long-feared end of days? Continue reading →

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | 14 Comments

Paul D. Wilson: The Weak in Review

Posted on March 14, 2014 by Paul Wilson

The Lindsay Lohan Laid List

The train wreck we love to hate; the girl who should have been a Kardashian, Lindsay Lohan is back in the news with a list of dudes she’s slept with.

Somehow the list came into the possession of In Touch magazine. No one’s quite fully sure if it’s real or fake, it could be just another stunt to get her career less career back in the news, but the list is a virtual who’s who of celebrities. So much so that a few of the names have been blurred out by the editors of In Touch!

Headlining the list – among the many others – is none other than, James Franco, Justin Timberlake, Joaquin Phoenix, Adam Levine and Colin Farrell. I had the list examined by a forensics handwriting analyst here in Kansas City and one blurred out line clearly reveals the name “Craig Glazer” when viewed under black light.

Personally, I’m betting the list is as fake as she is and leaked to get her sorry ass back in the news.

Continue reading →

Posted in Paul Wilson | 21 Comments

Buying Cheapest Generic Ocuflox Without Prescription

Posted on March 14, 2014 by default

Buy ocuflox and Generic Ofloxacin tablets online for antibiotics. Available without prior prescription. Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Sounds Good: Split Lip @ Knuckleheads, Jim Jeffries @ Midland

Posted on March 14, 2014 by Matthew Donnelly

Ok, sit down. Seriously. It’s for your own good. scott-stapp-barbudo1_jpg_630x486_q85

Ready? Scott Stapp is coming to Lawrence on Tuesday, March 25th for a solo show at the Granada! Yes, the lead singer from Creed, one of the most hated bands in recent memory. Did I mention that he’s sold north of 50 million records? And that was when you could actually make money selling records.

Yes, he’s from Florida.

Continue reading →

Posted in Matthew_Donnelly | 1 Comment

Donnelly: Cruz Azul Heads Back to Mexico With a One-Goal Deficit

Posted on March 13, 2014 by Matthew Donnelly

Mexican powerhouse Cruz Azul rolled into town Wednesday to take on Sporting KC in the first leg of the CCL.

And what would have been thought of as a major mismatch a few years ago certainly was not that on this night.

“They are still as athletic and strong as we have always known them to be,” explained Azul manager Luis Fernanda Tena. “They have always had this characteristic, but now you see very technically gifted players as well. You see that improvement to the point where MLS and Mexican teams are very even in terms of quality.” Continue reading →

Posted in Matthew_Donnelly, Uncategorized | 3 Comments

Hearne: The Dumbing Down of Sex in Kansas City

Posted on March 13, 2014 by Hearne Christopher Jr.

Leave it to the Kansas City Star to find a way to make sex uninteresting…

Seriously. Not that a study called The Hustle about the “economics of the underground commercial sex industry” was meant to titillate, still did anybody else try choking down the newspaper’s sum up of the story?

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz….

Geez, they couldn’t even find a way to localize the several city study enough so people here could make it maybe halfway through the article?

What the heck, I’ll take a whack at it. Continue reading →

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | 10 Comments

Hearne: KU Women Get Short End of Stick…Again

Posted on March 13, 2014 by Hearne Christopher Jr.

Bonnie Henrickson
KU women’s basketball coach

It’s becoming increasing clear when it comes to the University of Kansas that money talks and pretty much everything else walks…

Even tiny amounts of money, as in a paltry $25 per student, per semester fee used to help fund women’s and non-revenue sports at the KU. Because in a startling move, the KU student senate voted to end a 35 year-old subsidy for said sports, which began as a means to help the university comply with the Title IX gender equity in education law.

And guess who’s to blame for sticking it to the so-called Lady Jayhawks?

The dudes running the Athletics Department who are poised to bestow quarter million dollar apartments on top level, one-and-done, NBA-bound basketball recruits. Men only, of course. The women got shut out of the deal after the Kansas legislature refused to fund the folly. And because according to the KU students who voted 55-3 to kill the fees, the athletics department doesn’t need the dough based on it being a $93.6 million corporation. Continue reading →

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | 8 Comments

Jack Goes Confidential: ‘Need For Speed’ Delivers for Gearheads

Posted on March 13, 2014 by Jack Poessiger

On my way to the screening of NEED FOR SPEED I was fully expecting another FAST & FURIOUS….

However, that’s not what I got.

The FAST & FURIOUS franchise has improved with ongoing chapters. So the comparison should only be with the original FAST & FURIOUS back in 2001 which was average at best.

NEED FOR SPEED reminds me more of those Roger Corman action flicks of the late 60’s and early 70’s. The rubber burning hot rod sagas where storyline and acting were merely a backdrop. The stars were always the hot cars. Continue reading →

Posted in Jack Poessiger | 3 Comments

Leftridge: NFL Free Agency Starts, Chiefs Departing Left and Right

Posted on March 12, 2014 by Brandon Leftridge

McCluster

As is custom this time of year, the NFL free agency period is underway. There have been some big (though mostly unexpected) moves, like the Chicago Bears releasing DE Julius Peppers, the Dallas Cowboys releasing DE DeMarcus Ware (who is likely to sign with the Denver Broncos, which is absolutely terrifying), and the New Orleans Saints promising to release former K-State Wildcat and current Always Fun Guy to Watch Darren Sproles, but then deciding that “due to high levels of interest from multiple teams,” they’d trade him instead. Dicks.

So far, my favorite moment has been the San Francisco 49ers trading a 6^th round pick to the Jacksonville Jaguars for the services of former Mizzou QB Blaine Gabbert, who has been an absolute flop in his first three NFL seasons. (And—hilariously enough—will be making more than current San Fran QB Colin Kaepernick, provided there are no contract restructurings.)

Back in Kansas City, the ol’ Chiefs are HEMORRAGING (mediocre) players, and BOY ARE MY FACEBOOK FRIENDS FREAKING OUT! HOWEVER WILL WE SURVIVE WITHOUT DEXTER MCCLUSTER?! I LOOOOVE HIM! #sad #StupidChiefs. (Then they post a Buzzfeed quiz informing us all which Golden Girl they’d most like to bang, and the world moves on.) Continue reading →

Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Sports | Tagged Brandon Leftridge, free agency, John Dorsey, KC chiefs | 42 Comments

Paul Wilson: Sprint / T-Mobile Merger Bloviating; Nicely Played, Son

Posted on March 12, 2014 by Paul Wilson

Talk about blowing smoke signals…

SoftBank main man Masayoshi Son – the company that now owns Sprint – spoke to the U.S. Chamber of Commerce yesterday in what most assuredly was meant to garner propaganda headlines aimed at the FCC. Not that the regulatory body overseeing a proposed merger of Sprint and T-Mobile doesn’t already have all the facts it needs to make a decision.

My guess is that was it was a play by Son to curry favor for an approval.

The new Sprint BMOC, (big man on campus), who describes himself as blunt and frequently yells at the execs inside his newest telephone play toy, says that if regulators let him take over T-Mobile that he will revolutionize the American cellphone market the way he did Japan’s, complete with price wars and faster bandwidth speeds.

So how fast is fast? Son wants to provide 1 gigabit per second, same as Google Fiber.

For you non techies who don’t know how fast 1 gigabit per second actually is, it’s so fast, Harley’s comments will show up practically as soon as he thinks them! Continue reading →

Posted in Paul Wilson | 22 Comments

Hearne: Scribe Lays Pipe to Andy Reid & This Year’s Chiefs

Posted on March 12, 2014 by Hearne Christopher Jr.

Brace yourselves Chiefs fans, prepare for the worst….

Because everybody’s favorite sports know-it-all Craig Glazer is back to let you in on the awful truth about this year’s Kansas City Chiefs.

“I am so down on this team,” Glazer says. “More so than last year. I think they’re complete phonies.”

No mincing of words there.

“Everybody made a big deal last year out of the Chiefs hiring Andy Reid as head coach,” Glazer continues. “But he was about to get fired by Philadelphia. I mean, Philly wanted him gone. Andy Reid was an out-of-shape guy with deep family problems. You know, he wasn’t a happy guy. I look at him on the sidelines and he just doesn’t have any energy.”

If the Chiefs wish to succeed, they need to lose Andy Reid, Glazer says. Continue reading →

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | 30 Comments