Hearne: The Story Behind Billy’s Belly

Nobody steps on the big Bill Self’s cape…

Nope. That goes without saying, that in the wilds of Lawrence, Kansas – home to Self’s basketball Jayhawks – he gets a pass on anything short of maybe daylight bank robbery or doing bad stuff to kids.

Example: No one’s ever said diddly – other than behind his back – about that itchy critter that hovers over Self’s bald noggin. Let alone the extramarital affair he allegedly had with one of my former neighbors that resulted in Wild Bill moving from his Taj Mahal-like home in the burbs to an upscale condo for however many months.

Which is not to say the entire town of Lawrence isn’t obsessed with Self’s every move – each and every detail of his life inside the local fish bowl.

The latest?

Local tongues are wagging about Self’s sudden weight gain.

“I first noticed it last year,” says one prominent KU fan. “I noticed it on TV; I noticed it with the suit he was wearing that didn’t fit; and I noticed it in person.”

How noticeable was it?

“Very,” says the source. “He’s gotta be 250 to 300 pounds now. I’ll bet he’s gained 50 pounds.”

Why? How?

“I think it’s a combination of stress and his age – and that and he loves beer,” says the source. “I think it’s more of a health issue because I don’t think he takes care of himself. And he’s a part owner of the Salty Iguana and he probably eats there a lot.”

One possibility for the coach’s blimping:

“Weigh gain is a common symptom of Cushing’s syndrome, a condition in which you are exposed to too much of the stress hormone cortisol, which in turn causes weight gain and other abnormalities.,” according to WebMD. “It can also happen when your adrenal glands make too much cortisol, or it could be related to a tumor.”

“I don’t think there’s any hidden secret to it,” counters the fan. “He’s just putting on weight – a lot and fast.”

Here’s hoping Self doesn’t outgrow that pricey hairpiece…

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45 Responses to Hearne: The Story Behind Billy’s Belly

  1. Jim a.k.a. BWH says:

    Wow. Just wow.


      What famous columnist pointed out that bill self had gained weight?
      The first to break the story over a week ago….6 days before this story and
      photo……..was the famouns BOOM BOOM!
      Look at my stories the last week having seen self get up from the table
      at salty iguana tv show on spectrum sports. He was way overweight.
      And BOOM BOOM BROKE THE STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
      He is having some problems this year and his attitude has changed
      Maybe the lawrence beat writer and famous writer for the free “in the beat up
      old box” PITCH can garner some info for us about this breaking and important news item.
      And hearne…how about his hair? What’s up with that. Looks rough…but
      thats because he lost his key stylist and weave expeert off antioch.
      Come on hearne…inquiring minds want to know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
      And since you got the inside scoop lets hear from you. Then let boom boom
      give you the facts and maybe some photos that will light up your website!!!!!!!

      • hearne II says:

        come on hearne….let ths air. Boom boom got the scoop before
        anyone and then you come out with an article that uses my
        information as the basis for an article.
        fair is fair.
        and if you’re nice i can provide more info of major importance to the entire city of kcmo.

        • admin says:

          O, Boom Boom…

          Lest you throw out your arm trying to pat yourself on the back, you’re far from alone in noticing Self’s weigh gain.

          This column arose from a conversation with a local who has occasion to rub elbows with “Billy” on a week to week basis

  2. Jess says:

    That is some hard hitting stuff there

  3. Gavin says:

    I’m sure it’s a bit much to expect actual investigative reporting when you have such hard-hitting stories as this, but did you actually VERIFY Self’s ownership stake in Salty Iguana? I ask because you don’t have anyone willing to go on the record with that and I honestly do not know.

    But I do know how to check a business filing with the Kansas Secretary of State. Anyone can do that. I looked over these annual reports going back several years and I can’t find any mention of Self being a Director of the corporation that owns Salty Iguana. Now, does that mean that he is not an “owner?” I mean, I guess it could. He could be a silent partner, but even a partner would want to have his interest declared if he is a corporate director because the problem with Bill Self being sued by a patron or employee is simply not worth it. He would not be considered an “insured” by the carrier of any Directors & Officers liability insurance the business would have if he isn’t a declared Director. If he owns an interest in the restaurant and someone sues, he probably won’t have commercial general liability insurance either.

    I’m only hypothesizing here. I fully admit that it’s possible that Self owns an interest in the place. But if no one can prove it and the only evidence of it is an anonymous “prominent KU fan,” maybe that should be taken with a grain of margarita salt.

    Here’s a link to the Salty Iguana corporate filings with the Kansas Secretary of State. I’ll admit if I’m wrong. https://www.kssos.org/filed_doc_viewer/view_entity.aspx?id=07022001303496412&submit=View+History+and+Documents

    • Phaedrus says:

      Gavin, you’re confused. Officers/directors and owners are two separate things.

      I wouldn’t be surprised if the Salty Iguana had 50 different partners/owners. I was an investor in a well-known restaurant in Lawrence and it had upwards of 40 different partners. Most of them owned less than 1%. The only way you’d find out that I was an owner would be to get a copy of the restaurant’s tax return or my individual tax return.

      Given all the radio ads I used to hear, I’d be shocked if Self wasn’t given an ownership interest in exchange for appearing in those ads.

  4. Phaedrus says:

    Self could probably get away with doing bad things to kids. Paterno still has his defenders. A cult is a powerful thing.

  5. CG says:

    Bill doesn’t weigh 300 or close..he is overweight but in line with many men his age…its not crazy fat…he wants that 14th season of winning the conference, a record that likely will never be broken, and then he is ready to leave Kansas…NBA or big name college team again.

  6. Lydia Lozano says:

    Get over it. He has a Dad Bod. It is a thing. Leave him alone. Also, unless you are a perfect specimen of manhood, stop with the toupee-shaming.

    • admin says:

      Just keeping you up on what people are talking, wondering about…

      But when you think of it, Okie from a tiny town where the median income in like $13,000 per starts making millions of dollars a year buys himself not one but two mega mansions, spends a ton of time on his rug – clearly a vanity-not-health issue and conducts one of the most high profile affairs in a town that’s smaller than my brain, right in front of his wife and adult children…I dunno…seems like he’s done more than his fair share of shaming, if you get my drift

      • HEARNE: you said “right in front of his wife and adult children”.
        This harkens back to the time when your key writer was doing things in front
        of young children. Remember that? He wrote about it in his
        column. At least the kids were adults in your comment!

        • CG says:

          Harley, in that ‘comedy’ story, the guy was 19 and left, he saw nothing as I booted them all out and wrote that as well. So get a life, huh.

          • hearne II says:

            bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz….you lied and I will go to my files to find the truth.He was not 19….you wrote he was younger.
            Please glaze…see what happened to roy jones?

      • Lydia Lozano says:

        Amazing how you can turn into a Baptist Sunday School teacher in the blink of an eye when it suits you. The real shame here is the financial set up for athletics at both KU and K State and the amount of money that is made from it that never goes anywhere near the academic mission of the schools. Meanwhile the schools go to the Legislature posing as paupers.

        • admin says:

          Make no mistake,I can turn on a dime at times…

          I agree with your point about the money in college athletics. Something doesn’t seem right about these departments masquerading as non profits while doling out obscene amounts of money to people like Self and others in the departments.

          That said, while the world would probably be a better place were we to stop the madness, as long as we live in a win at all cost society, those sea changes are highly unlikely to take place.

          Here endeth today’s sermon

  7. whats the big deal. Look at glaze’s recent photos. No difference between
    him and self. Both wear a wig and everyone knows it.
    Is this bill’s last year at ku. We hope not. Great guy and coach!

    Like who owns the strip clubs and what’s happening at local drinking establishments
    throughout kc! BOOM BOOM KNOWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  9. hearne…look what boom boom wrote a full 24 hours before your “belly” story broke.
    It was written on kcc yesterday……you stole my story….word for word you and glaze
    stole boom booms words!

  10. DPW says:

    I noticed a couple of years ago that he had gained a few pounds. I could see it in his face. Cushing’s syndrome really? Sounds like the wild speculation surrounding President Trump’s health that is common chatter on MSNBC…

    • CG says:

      I don’t know but seems he’s just getting older and guys who don’t hit the gym much and don’t diet tend to gain weight…it could just be that. I don’t see it as a scary amount, maybe I’m wrong. His hair actually looks better as of a year or so ago, with his wealth he likely has it done daily…don’t know that either. Hey he has a stressful job. I just hope he can win the conference this one more time at least and have that milestone. So far it doesn’t look as if KU will be a final four type team, but they have time to get better. His teams tend to do that.

      • hearne II says:

        bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz….you lied and I will go to my files to find the truth.He was not 19….you wrote he was younger.
        Please glaze…see what happened to roy jones?

  11. Arte says:

    Always amazes me when someone gets a rug, no one ever speaks of their baldness again–at least not in front of them. It’s like they never were bald. It’s a weird phenomenon. It’s like the last bastion of politeness in our society.

    • admin says:

      While that’s a bit of an out there observation, Arte, we do live in a society where things like fat shaming, body shaming, fill-in-the-blank shaming are considered off limits.

  12. Goose13 says:

    The rug on top has been know for years. He doesn’t hide it. He doesn’t wear the rug during practice. The weight gain is because of the Prairie Village Burrito!

    • admin says:

      Stop the presses, Goose…

      You are correct, the rug story has been out there for awhile…can’t remember exactly but it was either me or Jason Whitlock who kinda broke it. Jason spent a lot of time kissing up to him though so he’d come to his much ballyhooed bashes, so maybe not

      • hearne II says:

        what was the name of the famous tom hanks movie?
        that’s where it all happens ___________12!
        and breakfast is served at 7am at hy vees at 95th and mission.
        NO….there’s nothing wrong with a toupe…unless it’s that
        mess on top of hearnes writers head where it looks like a muskrat.
        During hunting season he has to lay low or the hunters from
        frontier justice with blow it away!!!!!!!!!!!!!hahahahahahahaha

  13. Rainbow Man says:

    If someone thinks Bill is near 300 they have not seen him. I have recently, up close. He is nowhere near 300.

  14. hearne II says:

    Don King just sent me an email. Said he would sponsor a fight between the kansas
    coach and glaze. Heavyweight match. Winner get $100 certificate to arbys…where
    the meats are!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  15. E.H. says:

    It’s funny, I was out of the country for 20 years and when I came back there were 250 lb. waitresses working at Outback. Waitresses back in 1992 probably weighed between 120-150 MAX. Bill Self is just following the norm to obesity in this country.

  16. chuck says:

    I was in Coach’s last night talking to this slightly chunky chick. She told me, that if I wasn’t bald and overweight and, maybe a little younger, I wouldn’t be “Half Bad”.

    I told her, that if that were true, I would be talking to her friends.

  17. CG says:

    Bill being overweight, wearing a piece which most knew for years, is not the problem. His problem is his team, he is clearly worried they aren’t going to be good enough to win the big 12 for the 14th time which is his legacy….thats his goal not the final 4.

  18. CG says:

    Well Hearne you hit a hot button on this Bill Self story…lots of response…good one!

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