Hearne: Forsooth Chiefs Fans, There is Life After Football

And now, the rest of the story…

So much gloom and doom over the Kansas City Chiefs of late. Chillax, people. Tis the season to be jolly. Not angry or heartsick because a bunch of our hired gun, from out-of-town, millionaires lost a half dozen games to some other city’s from-out-of-town, hired gun millionaires. That’s no reason to bah humbug away our daily lives.

Hey, we still have the Plaza lights, right?

Seriously though…

How many NFL teams are there, 32, right?

Which means that without fail, like 97 percent of the cities with pro football teams flunk out each and every year.

So effing what?

What are the pitiful souls who live in those 31 loser cities supposed to do – curl up and die? Of course not.

It’s a game, people, just a game.

And from what I could tell, Sunday’s ill fated Chief’s loss to the New York Jets was a heckuva fun-to-watch, closely-contested game. Not something to cry our eyes out over. Not something that cast a pallor over the entire town.

I mean, too bad the Chiefs lost and all, but from an entertainment perspective it was exciting and entertaining.

Allow me to remind you of that antiquated axiom our parents and teachers tried to teach us long ago:

It’s not whether you win or lose, but how you play the game.

That said, with all the money involved in professional sports – college, too – that line of thinking seems to have gotten lost in the shuffle.

For example, how much does KU basketball coach Bill Self get paid to cheat on his wife and lord over the entire state of Kansas? Over $4.7 million a year. Ridiculous, right?

Ridiculous but true.

And how many millions of dollars do fans shell out to run around in public wearing garish red and yellow nylon Chiefs jackets and the like?

Many sports fans are literally “invested” in today’s sports culture. And who likes to make a bad investment?

The bottom line: Kansas City is an increasingly cool place to live for dozens, hundreds or more reasons.Look around.  And three of those reasons are that we have successful professional sports teams in football, baseball and soccer. Just like many similar size and larger cities do.

However, while it definitely makes things more fun and raises our spirits when these teams on occasion field championship teams, it does nothing to take away from the quality of life here when they do not.

So how about we collectively keep it in our pants when some other city’s hired guns beat our hired guns and avoid the temptation of equating the successes or lack thereof in our lives with that of these three teams.

Think of it in terms of a cup half full – we’re fortunate to have these sort of entertainment options. But after all, there are lots of other ways to fritter away (or make) money besides just  sending it to Vegas, buying tacky sports gear or laboring over fantasy sports statistics for months on end .

Am I wrong?




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22 Responses to Hearne: Forsooth Chiefs Fans, There is Life After Football

  1. Guy Who Says What Others Think says:

    “For example, how much does KU basketball coach Bill Self get paid to cheat on his wife and lord over the entire state of Kansas?”

    I had no idea that KU was PAYING Bill Self to cheat on his wife. Hell, I was naive enough to think the were paying him to run one of the most winningest basketball programs in the nation. Silly me. All this time it was about infidelity and the fascistic rule of a desolate fly-over state. My world is shattered.

    Don’t write stupid shit like that Hearne. It weakens your point.

    • admin says:

      I dunno…

      It garnered a clever retort from you…I’ll take it!

    • Jim a.k.a. BWH says:

      Hearne’s objectivity regarding all things KU left the building a loooooooooooong time ago. Nobody cares who anybody is banging. That starts with the Mango Mussolini in the White House and goes all the way down to Glazer. Hell, people in Alabama don’t even care if you were doing 14 year olds. Al Davis was right. Just win, baby.

      • admin says:

        Pretty harsh, Jimbo…

        Actually, the way things are going these days that’s about all anybody cares about – take Al Franken today.

        Allow me to remind you that I was a long term season ticket holder in both KU football and basketball. And I have more than a few friends from MU that loved nothing more than to talk me into taking KU in football.

        But don’t let any of that affect your narrative

        • Jim a.k.a. BWH says:

          Yes, yes, yes. You’ve reminded me over and over about your previous season ticket status……and then I read all your articles about KU. Pretty sure I have the narrative correct.

          Listen, I don’t have a dog in the fight. But, it’s not difficult to sniff out your disdain for all things that happen at KU, particularly when it comes to the athletic department. What do you care what Self makes? It’s not your money. Obviously, KU feels like his worth to the university is worth a few million a year. I’d argue that he is grossly underpaid. Like Coach K, Saban, Stoops, Snider, Meyer, et al, their success is worth 10’s of millions of dollars to their respective universities.

          You’re comparing all the D-Bags out there with sexual assault claims against them to an alleged affair between consenting adults? Wow. Interesting take.

          • admin says:

            Fair enough…

            However since you seem to be fishing for motive, my answer would be that by virtue of my covering KU sports and the athletic department and living in Lawrence, several things have become obvious. And because of that exposure – which comes largely because of geography – I’ve been a witness to the way the athletics department and KU fans operate.

            You say you don’t have a dog in this fight, but your comments and opinions indicate otherwise.

            Did you miss the point of my column while zeroing in on the tiny portion that touched on KU?

            And that’s that sports today has grown way excessive with people investing an unhealthy amount of their time and interest in the pursuit go winning at any cost. Like you, KU fans turn a blind eye towards the misdeeds of its sports teams and athletes.

            And speaking of extremes, here you come arguing that Bill Self making $5 million a year renders him “grossly underpaid.”

            And for the record, I made no such comparison between Self’s embarrassing, small town affair and sexual assault…nice try though.

            The bottom line; Not only did you seem to miss my main point, you’re part of the problem. To the extent that win at all costs, no matter what can be considered.

            You know, they have institutions to help people with gambling and sex obsessions. What do you think about therapy for people with compulsive sports addictions? Would you consider looking into it if they were available?

          • Jim a.k.a. BWH says:

            Sheeeeze. Gambling and sex addiction therapy? I’m supposed to have an opinion on that? Why?

            Two final points:
            1. I don’t give a damn what other people make. That is up to the people that pay them. Coaches, athletes, entertainers, actors, etc are worth EXACTLY what someone is willing to pay them. Period.
            2. What people choose to spend their own hard-earned money on is their own business. You or I don’t have to agree with it or even understand it.
            For example, I don’t gamble. The closest thing to it is the occasional lottery ticket. My company was involved in the construction of every single casino in this town and I’ve only been in 2 of them and that was to eat dinner. but, if Joe Blow wants to throw his paycheck down on a craps table, more power to him.

            So no, I didn’t miss your larger point of the column. I just don’t share your anxiety when it comes to other people’s money, morality or lifestyle. I have my own ‘biness to tend to.

          • admin says:

            Well said, Jim…

            And while I agree people can make whatever they can make, my overview is that money in sports – college sports especially – has gotten to the point that it seems to be corrupting the system.

            When it’s all about the money people will go to lengths and do things that don’t necessarily qualify as ethical.

            Again, the reason I’ve dogged KU so much is that because I’ve lived in and around KU and Lawrence so long, I’ve been an eye witness to their less than admirable practices and the way their fans have been so amoral when it comes to just about anything and everything that has to do with the basketball program.

            Were I as plugged into Missouri (and maybe K-State) or any number of similar school’s athletics programs, etc. it’s likely that I’d be writing perhaps similar stories. But like Matt Donnelly (remember him?) used to joke, when I moved to Lawrence five years ago I started viewing things here from the standpoint of it being a cult.

  2. Kerouac says:


    – ‘Blue Men’, Kansas City style…


    – six of one, half a dozen (times 8) the other: Christmas Day ’71, Buffalo ’94 – seasons ’95 ’97 plus 44 more more…

    ‘Anybody heeeeeere seen my old friend Dawson, Taylor Stram Bell, Johnny Robinson? Chiefs won a lotta games once, that was then this is now, present looks around, past is gone’…

    “Forsooth Chiefs Fans, There is Life After Football”

    – far south: now serving number 2017; great bandwagon seats remain for 2018…

    “we have successful professional sports teams in football, baseball and soccer.”

    – Meatloaf quaver: ‘two out of three ain’t bad’… compromise ascribe: ‘entertainment’ in lieu ‘success’… sobering reality’s punch: ‘going through the motions’, once more…
    the comedy 🙂 and the Tragedy 😥


    Deck the halls swiss chiefs their folly, Fa la la la la la la la! Merry Christmas to all, and to another swiss season, goodnite!

  3. CG says:

    Hearne you are right. Only one perhaps two cities are happy at years end with a super bowl game, the winner and loser of that game. Otherwise we all bitch…It’s just been a very long wait here with lots of promises and not much else…and for us baby boomers who once had a great team in the late 60’s and early 70’s even harder to take with todays b.s. teams..Yet its just a game, they get paid and we pay to see them and buy their crap…our fault. Lots of fun things to do besides watch the Chiefs lose and their tired excuses, agreed. Good points.

    • Guy Who Says What Others Think says:

      CG…any updates on your liquor license? Is it going to the Missouri State Supreme Court or what?

    • E.H. says:

      I wonder if being stuck in the midwest keeps us from getting enough star players on the team at one time? After all, how many Superbowls do midwest teams have? 2?

      • admin says:

        Hard to say, EH…

        Unlike the days when NFL players made so much less money and had to have off season jobs and lived in the cities they played in, seems like most of KC’s big stars left town for more glam locals when the season ended.

  4. here’s a fact….whatever ku pays self it isn’t enough. That basketball program probably
    generates 20x his salary a year with their winning seasons. With bball ku would nothing more than another emporia state or washburn…a big nothing.
    with the worst football team in college history….yes college history…
    a deteriorating school with funding problems…..
    cuts in almost every area…..without that bball program that self has built that school
    would be nothing.
    This year they are short and slower than previous years (according to self) so we
    shall see how they do. Ya think sprint would have them play there if they were
    without self and his great winning record? Hearne…who cares about self’s social
    life or his hair style…..its pretty simple…bball has made kansas famous and its
    what draws students there. Change that and its a big nothing!
    Plus…did anyone notice self’s gainedsome serious weight from seeing him during his
    press conference after washington loss? Now that’s news that enquiring minds want to hear about! (lol)

    • admin says:

      You go, boy…

      • CG says:


        • admin says:

          They want to, but they don’t have the dough yet

          • why build a new football stadium? Are they
            going to try to attract chiefs there.
            I mean they could fit their football crowds into
            allen field house and play arena football.
            300 million. thats a drop in the bucket for
            mu athletics fund.
            keep the stadium you have ku. No use spending
            taxpayers money on another doozie. The one you have is never full or even 1/10th full.
            Spend the money on self and getting some taller faster players.

          • admin says:

            What they do have is a beautiful campus and storybook downtown with an affluent, educated population just half an hour from an increasingly cool Kansas City.

            As opposed to MU, which is located in the middle of nowhere, two hours away from civilization (as in St Louis or KC) a rural population and a campus that at the very least is far from pretty….enjoy

  5. E.H. says:

    ALex Smith will go to Cleveland to hook up with GM John Dorsey and the Browns will immediately get much better.
    KC will go with Mahomes in 2018 and OMG they will get so much better.
    Andy Reid will finally have a great QB(McNabb was very good too) and he will look like a genius in our eyes.
    KC, get ready for some Super Bowls!

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