Boonville, Missouri a vacation destination?
No way, trust me – I’ve vacationed there (if you wanna call it that) – more than once even.
Yet here comes Smithsonian Magazine positioning Boonville up there alongside legit small town getaways like Nantucket, Massachusetts, Stuart, Florida, Port Townsend, Washington, Estes Park, Colorado and Cooperstown, New York.
Which of course is insane.
To the extent it calls into question the Smithsonian’s credibility as a research center. And after reading the mag’s description of Boonville, one has to wonder if story’s author even bothered to visit. She did get a nice photo from the town’s tourism office.
For starters, Smithsonian writer Bess Lovejoy bogusly claims Boonville was “settled” by the sons of famous frontiersman Daniel Boone.
Au contraire.
While it’s true that the town “derived” its name from Boone’s sons who had a salt biz “near” there in the early 1800s, it was founded by pioneers Hannah and Stephen Cole in 1810 and formally “laid out” by Asa Morgan and Charles Lucas in 1817.
Boone’s kids aren’t even listed among the town’s so-called “notable residents.”
A list that includes country crooner Sara Evans and Walter Williams, the founder of the Missouri School of Journalism and former president of the University of Missouri.
Seriously, this is the kind of poppycock you get when some random magazine decides to try and rope in some new readers by choking out a “best of” list.
Oh, and guess who did the roping?
Writer Bess Lovejoy
A writer chick from Brooklyn with a penchant for the dark side.
When Lovejoy’s not churning out fluff pieces like “The 20 Best Small Towns to Visit,” she’s a member of The Order of Good Death and founding member of Death Salon who specializes in macabre stories like, Einstein’s Brain Heist: Why Are We So Obsessed with Famous Dead Bodies?, The Doctor Who Starved Her Patients to Death, There Is No Right Way to Die, The Horrors of Premature Burial , The Rise in Exhumations, Cremation is On the Rise, But Where To Put the Ashes? and How Did Bits of Percy Shelley’s Skull End Up in the New York Public Library?
There’s nothing wrong with any of that, of course.
However advising folks from all over the globe to vacation in Boonville is just plain wrong – even if there is a 2,000-year-old Native American burial ground nearby.
Don’t get me wrong, say you’re driving down I-70 and need gas, a brief pit stop, maybe a place to crash. Maybe then.
Boonville does have a decent retro hotel – The Hotel Frederick, but the food there’s pricey and it kinda sucks. There’s a cool, historic bed and breakfast in town too, but that hardly qualifies it as a vacation destination.
Because aside from that, the downtown is beyond sleepy. There are some bicycle trails and a lame casino on the river (which is pretty much the only place to party if you’re looking for anything approaching a nightlife scene).
But you know, if you wanna catch a little vibe of the town Sara Evans grew up it, knock yourself out.
And don’t forget to tell ’em the Smithsonian sent you.
Have you ever been to Boonville?
Would you rather it be KCK to see the development kansas taxpayers pay for over and over again? or the big ball of twine? or the man dug well?
I’ve been there a ton. Couple times for stories. A couple to vacation.
Oh my . . . https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lpagxWs7pG4
The video is about Boonville, INDIANA.
not a bad little city. better than Centralia…..but every one should visit it…
jut like Lawrence….they might find some old time shoe repair dudes~!
That picture looks totally photoshopped.
Do I remember Pete’s Café contributing to this town’s history?
By the way, about 12 years go or so SAIL magazine cited the Lake of the Ozarks as one of the best places for freshwater sailing…….a lake with bluffs and cliffs so high that wind on the surface of the water was virtually blocked! No sailing there!
bg
And fighting big wakes from power boats. LOTO is a horrible sailing lake.
Booneville = NANTUCKET? And this chick gets to write for Smithsonian?
If you’re into that kind of thing, it’s “neighbor” Arrow Rock is three times the destination but still not a pimple on Nantucket’s azz.
Used to summer in The Hamptons myself.
Stayed at Paul Newman’s place.
Always enjoyed the Shinicock who kept junky, rusted cars on cinder blocks to keep their neighbors angry.
Nantucket joke in, 3…, 2…, 1…
Take me down to Hiku
City where the grass
is green and the damnit.
There once was a man from Nantucket
Who kept all his cash in a bucket.
But his daughter, named Nan,
Ran away with a man
And as for the bucket, Nantucket.
Perhaps, it’s not the town of Boonville. Just to the east of Boonville is Warm Springs Ranch. Try getting in there on short notice. We’re headed there to see Arizona. Further east is the Katy Trail and Le Bourgeois winery. They’re not in Booneville either, but close. How far does Booneville’s notariety extend? As Samuel Clemments once asked, “Which is the bust, and which is the pedestall?
If Boonville is a top American tourist destination, I wonder how much jack it takes to rent out that house on top of that decrepit old bridge. I think I’m priced out of the game before it even begins.
Grew up there – same time as Sara who did not grow up in Boonville . . she’s from a town across the river called New Franklin. Much smaller, just as sleepy. But if you cross the river toward New Franklin, there is a great stretch of road that is known for some late night speed racing.