Hearne: In Case You Haven’t Figured it Out Yet…

IMG_4493I’ve been on vacation this past week…

Which isn’t to say, “Hurry up and burgle me before I get back.”

That base is covered – life goes on at KC Confidential Central – even in my absence. Besides, I’ll be home shortly and we can resume sorting out the issues of the day and Brandon can return to his alternate life as a mild manned, suburban JOCO family man.

And undoubtedly, we’ll be getting an update from Craig Glazer on how bad the Chiefs and Royals suck (and always will). I know many of you are waiting for that shoe to drop.

You know and Paul Wilson bought a house finally – can you believe he’s been renting all these years? – and just texted a pic of his splendid new writing area there while vowing to getting back to writing three times a week.

We’ll see.

Mark Valentine is  so busy producing events this summer that he’s been strapped for the time it takes for writing and creating his particular brand of feature art. However he says he’ll return when the outdoor festival season slows.

Excuses, excuses. 

I’m going to take Valentine at his word on that though, because you know, he was pals with smartman and smartman never lied or exaggerated.

24060private_investigatorSpeaking of over-the-top comments section personas, anybody (besides Paul Wilson) notice that Harley has been missing in action the past week or two?

Might that mean that in spite of the fact that Wilson is absolutely certain The H Man lives in a cardboard box next door to an infected chemical storage facility, that he actually gets to go on vacation? Still, how could he leave the dismantling of all things KC Confidential behind?

Let’s hope he isn’t paying a visit to the smartman down under or wherever.

As for me, if it’s July, I must be in Tucson where I attended high school and the University of Arizona.

Hacienda Del Sol

Hacienda Del Sol

That’s because my kids are off for the summer, it’s “monsoon season” and the temps are quite a bit lower in Southern Arizona than most suspect. Which makes for far fewer tourists and ultra low room rates at fine establishments like the Hacienda Del Sol in the foothills of the Santa Catalina mountains.

BTW there’s no golf here too, so the poser quotient is far lower and it makes for an ultra mellow retreat.

As for local news, what passes for my alma mater, The Fenster School of Southern Arizona has fallen on hard times…again.

I graduated from the Southern Arizona School (SAS) a private school in Sabino Canyon that school went out of biz after an (insurance?) fire and was taken over by its far smaller rival Fenster.

Now Fenster appears to be on Death Row.

In May the school announced it would shut down for a year while it tried to recuperate from a drop in attendance. Which is kinda hard to imagine since the school’s listed average attendance is only 49 students to begin with.



I met and interviewed Kenneth Fenster at a high school reunion sometime back and he explained his father’s – the Fenster founder – economic philosophy.

Which was that a private school’s total tuition, boarding, etc should not exceed the approximate cost of a new Ford sedan. He cited a Ford Taurus, which at the time was approximately $20,000.

Kenneth told me he was sticking with that philosophy, although taking a gander at the school’s website, I see that the fees it had planned on charging for the 2014-2015 school year were $39,800 for domestic students and $40,800 for International.

Which struck me as high until I “built” a 2015 Ford Taurus Limited and it topped out at $40,215.

And while Fenster says it plans to be back in a year after taking stock of things and reorganizing, I’ve got my doubts. Especially after reading the opening sentence of the local news account of the school’s closing:

“A once-popular boarding school in the Sabino Canyon area — which attracted children of prominent families — is taking a year off to reinvent itself due to sagging enrollment and finances.”

Bear Down "Best Student Section Out There"

Bear Down
“Best Student Section Out There”

Anyway, things are mostly sunny and bright in my former home away from home and after taking a prospective students tour of the University of Arizona with my daughters yesterday I learned something rather interesting.

And that’s that the U of A athletics department here isn’t screwing the students over like they are at KU. That they actually value the student population in a way that is increasingly rare in Lawrence.

Our soon-to-be-a-junior tour guide told us proudly that the students at U of A get the best seats at basketball and football games, right behind the team’s bench down on the floor.

Fancy that.

Kind of makes you feel for the poor boosters, doesn’t it?

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16 Responses to Hearne: In Case You Haven’t Figured it Out Yet…

  1. paulwilsonkc says:

    Connect the DOTS….. Harley is Hearnes alter ego.
    No Hearne.
    No Harley.
    Coincidence? I think not….

  2. Hot Carl says:

    Maybe Harley has joined Smartman in the great comments section in the sky…we can hope, right?

  3. Jess says:

    I have been on the edge of my seat wondering what the King of sting thinks of the Chiefs

    • paulwilsonkc says:

      Jess, they will win it ALL unless they suck.

      • mike t. says:

        more like this; they suck, they’ve sucked since 1975 and they’ll always suck, but they might break out next year IF… and IF… and IF…

  4. mark smith says:

    Harley goes on sabbaticals to the local loony bin for thrice yearly electroshock and throrazine infused colonic therapy. Im pretty sure he will be back any day, posting what he refers to as facts, figures, and data. Hell, if you are lucky Hearne he might give you one of the macaroni Obama portraits he made when he wasn’t in restraints and a spit shield. Either that or he is yachting on the Carib with Leo Dicaprio and Joe Biden. Dude knows people

  5. harley says:

    i will be having a party for all the kcc people on aug 30…..no guns…no knives..
    just a few beeers with all the people that I’ve enjoyed debating/argusing/harassing
    with for the last couple of years.
    lifes too short to battle anyone….to argue…..this is for real…..
    to all my kcc supporters and detratctors…
    more info to follow.

  6. Truman72 says:

    Whatever happened to the local jeweler who was trying to impersonate Walt from breaking bad, you dangled that carrot out for weeks. Any update?

  7. CG says:

    Hearne is fine guys, spoke to him yesterday. He and his family are taking a break. Wish we all could. Construction still underway at new Stanfords at Rosana Square. Should be ready by end of summer as projected. Always something more to do. You know the drill. I think it will be very nice and big change is we have a full blown restaurant. So eat before the shows.

    The Royals have become the Royals. ‘Wait til next year.” We can trade Shields for…yeah right..this team is toast. I’m sorry I wrote that eat crow article. I was right the first time. It does pain me to say both teams are nowhere, but they are both going no place soon. Wish they were.

    My pals at 610 Link and Blink think soccer in KC will one day be the big news over Chiefs and Royals…hey maybe in 20 years. I can see that.

    Is soccer where NFL/AFL were in early 60’s now? I say no, more like 50’s NFL. Just starting to heat up nationally. But things move faster now.

    • the dude says:

      Looks like the Legends will be blowing up after the soccer facility announcement. Looks like you may be leaving at just the wrong time man.

      • CG says:

        No soccer is its own thing. Right now its pretty family oriented with some young folk as well. But when the stadium is full, they are there for the sports game not to go to comedy. You can’t do both at same time, they are on together. Just like T Bones…hey the soccer stadium was already doing well, it didn’t help Legends that much, some restaurants yes, but not late evening entertainment. It will help the area thats sure. Legends will hit its stride in ten years or so. Needs rooftops

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