Hearne: ‘Uncle Bruce’ Takes the Measure of Sex, Drugs at Rockfest 2014

IMG_4109

Bruce Findley

Think kinder, gentler Sodom and Gomorrah

Rockfest 2014, nothing wildly outrageous, just your everyday mash up of 50,000-plus at Penn Valley Park by Liberty Memorial engaging in fine art of sex, drugs and rock n roll – to the 10th power.

Or as Arthur P. Loatman, Jr. of Sweet Springs put it on Rockfest sponsor The Rock 98.9 FM’s website, and I quote:

“IT WAS AWESOME AS HELL MUD, TITS, BEER and MUSIC had few MOSH PITS TO GET AWAY FROM AND SOME SEXY WOMEN SURFING THE CROWD AND GOT A FEW TITTIES IN MY HAND AS WELL AS SOME ASS CHEEKS WOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!”

Get the picture?

For Lawrence electrician Bruce Findley it was the best bash he’d ever attended. And that includes recent concerts by Slayer at the Uptown and Mushroom Head at the Granada in Lawrence.

“We waited until after the showers around 2:30 or 3 p.m. and had pig snoot sandwiches at the Tenderloin Grill on Southwest Boulevard beforehand,” Findley says. “It had the texture of a boiled chicken neck.”

Ah, the perfect Rockfest repast.

However, with the odd exception, the music took a backseat for many – who like Findley – were there for the party vibe. Staring an eclectic mix of reefer and boobies.

“It took a while for all the alcohol to get going,” Findley says. “But of course there were boobies – you know, all the young men were freaking out because they were seeing boobies.”

To Findley’s thinking there are two types of Rockfest attendees.

“It’s kind of like going to the country club,” he muses. “Some people go for the golf or swimming and the rest go to see or be seen. At Rockfest a lot of the people don’t care so much about the music, they’re there to party. And the guys want to have a hot chick on their arm, you know, the trophy wife.”

The Big Bopper

The Big Bopper

To that end the flashing of female breasts was practically epidemic.

“I dunno, when did that start, Woodstock?” Findley wonders. “I mean, in the 1950s when they went to see the Big Bopper they didn’t pull up their shirts, did they?”

Findley’s unofficial boob count:

“Oh, it was endless, it was just endless,” he says. “Probably every five minutes a young man would go up to a girl and give her beads and she would flash. My favorite boobies were like four girls and they all had no top on and they had marijuana leaves painted over their nipples.”

Speaking of which…

“You know, in my day we had to hide marijuana – it wasn’t that open,” Findley says. “But at Rockfest smoking marijuana was as acceptable as having a beer. I thought I was in Denver, Colorado. I think there may have been more reefer there than cigarettes.

“There was a band that told everybody to hold up their lighters or cellphones – it was Five Finger Death Punch – then he made the comment that, ‘Hmmmm, more lighters than cellphones. You know what that means.’ ”

Unknown

Woodstock

How about the cops, was there any drug bust action?

“No, there were just a couple standing there at the gate as you came in,” Findley says. “But it was a well-behaved crowd. I didn’t see any police inside the festival.”

Meaning the KCPD gave potheads a pass at Rockfest?

“Yeah, the whole country is,” Findley says. “What were they going to do, stick their hands down everybody’s pants? It was a constant smell and pretty much everywhere you looked somebody was smoking. I mean, what are they going to do, write a ticket? That’s what they do in Lawrence, Kansas.

“It’s a different time. Pot is acceptable. It’s as acceptable as drinking. It’s not that (the police) turned a blind eye. What were they supposed to do, throw everybody out?”

562969_10152600096475192_1318114183_nThe bottom line:

“It’s all very innocent – innocent debauchery,” Findley says. “That’s why (police) let it go. You know, smoke a little weed, get a buzz and watch some boobies. You know, boobies are innocent; the business end is down below.

“And it’s really no big deal because the City Fathers aren’t being bugged. Where they are being bugged is on the Plaza. It’s kind of like strip clubs; they don’t want them next to the school, but they do know they exist. These are different times and it’s just nice to see there are people addicted to partying, not addicted to drugs.

“You know the people there, they smoked pot, but they weren’t there for that. They were there to party. It was fun, I’m going back next year. It’s a young man’s game, but it’s fun for older men too.”

As for stick-in-the-mud naysayers, “You know, some people don’t see innocent debauchery, they see debauchery. You know, here comes Jesus – Gym Coach Jesus – one person screws up and the whole world’s going to suffer. But debauchery’s not criminal – it’s the best party I ever went to.”

http://www.mb-kc.com/
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39 Responses to Hearne: ‘Uncle Bruce’ Takes the Measure of Sex, Drugs at Rockfest 2014

  1. Bob says:

    ““It’s kind of like going to the country club”

    Words never previously uttered before in relation to Rockfest.

  2. hLot harley says:

    sure hearne..how about the 15 year old girl getting mauled/manhandled/abused by
    the upper class “crowd” at YOUR ROCKFEST.
    We had concerts/festivals/etc. in our day…butno underage girl getting
    molested while she surfed.
    Yeah..for an old guys like you and glaze you jag off to this stuff. Because this is
    the only stuff you’re getting…..live “bobbies” …wow hearne…ever seen those?
    If not for aaron from stained it would have continued. Thanks to him he
    pointed out what was going on and saved the young girl from possible
    rape by these “classy ‘ low rent worthless people.
    Back when we went to festivals there was no internet or online porn.
    now these losers can get all they want online and hopefully leave the
    underage girls alone.
    Wow hearne…boobies?????????? You and the others in this article sound
    like third graders. Booooobbbbiies??????????? wow!!!!!!!!
    If that’s the best party you’ve beento where 21 yeard olds show their “booobbbbiees”
    then you’ve not lived…..or you need the blue pill to get going.
    For further proof of the “high society ” successful/articulate and
    in bred parties at rock fest go to nightlifekc.com. More pics for the “kids”
    but sorry hearne and glaze …’NO BOOOBBBBIEES”
    sheesh!

    • admin says:

      You must be a Johnny Dare listener…

      Yes, there was a girl who was getting manhandled and a guy in the band on stage took notice of it and warned the dudes not to do it again or he’d sic the crowd on them. So they stopped.

      • hLot harley says:

        never listen to johnny dare….saw the tv show about
        rockfest…saw the pics of previous rock fests…read about
        the crowds from other attendees.
        okay so they stopped.
        that’s like saying a guy raping a girl on the street is
        seen doing it by the police during the crime…he hears
        the policeman say STOP….then the criminal runs
        from the scene…and hence according to you hearne..
        he is not a criminal…NO HE HIS A CRIMINAL.
        DID YOU SEE ALL THE VIDEOS OF THE INCIDENT?
        whatif that was YOUR daughter? They broke the
        law …..jail time…
        WORRY HEARNE…WRONG AGAIN.
        there are laws to protect that underage girl!!!!!!!

  3. hLot harley says:

    how old is the lawrence plumber…does he ever get out of the basement.
    looks at least 40!
    must be a blast seeing all these “boobies” live and in person.
    I always wonder about people like this.

    • admin says:

      He’s north of 40, you’re right.

      But Slayer and Suicidal Tendencies at the Uptowm, Mushroomhead at the Grandad, he’s still a partier.

      Other than that, he’s a straight ahead, hard working dude with a successful business

      • Bob says:

        Are you going to get quotes from your lawn guy next?

        I keed I keed.

        Katie Horner is moving back to KC.

        • admin says:

          Seriously?

          I mean, on Katie Horner.

          • Bob says:

            Yep. She is not on the KMOV (St. Louis tv station) website anymore. Supposedly, she posted something on May 28 on a Facebook page somewhere. Maybe the station webpage.

            That is all I know. She still lists being a realtor at Reece and Nichols on her open FB page.

          • Bob says:

            To be more specific, I was forwarded a screengrab of some social media site where she had a brief note that she needed to move back to KC to be closer to her girls and that the new weather gal, Meghan, would be great. Go to KMOV’s weather site and you can access Megan’s (sp? I don’t know. I spent two minutes on this) and it says she started working there in May of 2014.

            This station is also carrying five meteorologists, which is insane.

        • NotAtMyMomsNow says:

          Whoa! Scoop. Hearne, get on it.

      • expat says:

        Well Mike Muir is 51 and Kerry King is 49. I like both those bands and went to see ST live last year but they are a lot older than I am and the crowd skewed geezer. Geezers with tattoos but geezers nonetheless.

  4. StillAtMyMoms says:

    Loatman’s quote = priceless.

    Journo students, that’s how you put a quote in a story.

  5. Guy Who Says What Others Think says:

    Didn’t attend Rockfest this year, but it sounds like the most successful music festival in Kansas City history continues to thumb it’s nose at the naysayers, and laugh all the way to the bank.

    • admin says:

      And the money that goes into that bank is largely from beer and alcohol sales is my understanding…

      Just think how much Entercom might make if they legalize pot and they can hawk it at the concession stands.

      What’s the over/under on how many years before Missouri legalizes it?

      • NotAtMyMomsNow says:

        A decade or more. But legalization for medicinal purposes? Much sooner since the legislature passed the Charlotte’s Web law that allows epileptic patients to be prescribed a cannabis extract.

  6. PB says:

    Holy sh!t, where in the hell did you dig up this rube? Boobies? Really?

    • admin says:

      You think the use of the word “boobies” is déclassé?

      Think again.

      Google the word and you’ll get nearly 9 million hits.

      And in the context of Rockfest, I’d say boobies is a fairly civil way to describe the, uh, activity of showing them in public.

      But that’s just me.

      • Bob says:

        I think the preferred nomenclature is Godzilla biscuits.

      • PB says:

        Yeah, perfectly acceptable terminology for a 9-year old pre-pubescent male, not some 50ish numbskull who apparently hasn’t seen his fair share of them or gasp…people smoking MARIJUANA! Yeah, this clown really seemed to really have the whole pulse of Rockfest.

  7. mark smith says:

    You say its all innocent fun, the lead singer for staind says its tantamount to rape. http://www.blabbermouth.net/news/stainds-aaron-lewis-berates-ahole-concertgoers-for-molesting-crowd-surfing-girl-video/
    Any way you slice it, it sounds like a giant bowl of douche bag stew.

  8. mark smith says:

    By the way, how old is this toilet plunger Findley? No spring chicken myself, but Bruce looks like he did his first plumbing job on Marie Antoinette’s bidet. He makes Glazer look like he gets daily IV drips of Ponce Deleon’s infused fountain water. Point being, most of your readers, and all of your writers are more AARP, myself included, and less Tiger Beat. Not for nothing, but your constant attempts to seem young , hip, and relevant, have the stench of desperation. Whats next? Skinny jeans with an elastic waistband?

    • admin says:

      Geez, Marie Antoinette?

      Try a decade plus younger than The Scribe.

      And how old do you think Matt Donnelly, Brandon and Katie are?

      Just keeping up with the times and giving folks a look at Rockfest thru the eyes of a willing participant, who is totally into the music and had a great time.

    • admin says:

      True Confession:

      I conducted that interview yesterday morning and wrote it right before I had to leave town and…

      Inadvertently wrote, plumber…or “toilet plunger” as Mark likes to say.

      However, Findley is an ELECTRICIAN, not a plunger.

    • hLot harley says:

      mark …great quotes…agree 1000% with you.
      hearne didn’t print my original post.
      congrats…we finally agree…
      rockfest in one big muddy sloppy event.
      thanks…harley

  9. newbaum turk says:

    First off, I hate crowd surfers. I hate getting kicked in the head by some moron. That said, when you decide to crowd surf you’ve given up the right to decide where hands go that are passing you along. I’m not saying some guy gets a free pass to maul a girl but I guarantee she kicked more than one person in the head or face. I bet guys accidentally put their hands somewhere they don’t want to when guys crowd surf too. It’s kind of an uncontrolled situation.

    • admin says:

      Excellent points, Turk

      • hLot harley says:

        its also a crime dude….read your manuals.
        when a guy does it and other guys grab him its somewhat
        different.
        when a bunch of high drunk guys are mauling/molesting/
        inserting etc (as according to lewis) its a whole
        nother matter.

  10. Skeptic says:

    Will Roger the Plumbers take on the port-a-potties next?

  11. Glenn says:

    When women of Woodstock took off their shirts, it was an expression of liberation and freedom from societal convention. It’s a metaphor for those times.

    When today’s women flash their boobies, it is done with lewd intent.

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