Paul Wilson: Week in Review – Halls Plaza Bails, Ferret Fever, Sister Twists & Snakes on the Plains

snakes-on-a-planeDeck the Halls…

Halls Plaza will close next summer and consolidate into a larger, remodeled Halls Crown Center some 20 blocks away. The downside; this is the last anchor tenant and old guard, local store left on the Plaza. On a positive note, this will consolidate all the pretentiousness into a single location.

Reliable sources tell me that three new tenants will occupy the old Halls space; Dollar General, Dollar Store and Dollar Tree.

Screen shot 2013-06-10 at 1.53.13 PMMore Classic KC Parents

Ferret Mom was sentenced this week to 30 days drug treatment and two years probation during which time she can have no contact with her five kids, four of which were not ferret food. The ferret chewed off all of her four month-old child’s fingers with the exception of two thumbs and part of a pinky, while mom and dad called and texted one another from various places other than the home while the attack was taking place. The 911 call was made from the home, however.

Jackson County Judge Michael Manners told Waldo she had “created a substantial risk” in allowing the animal to have access to the child. The child agreed and gave the Judge a congratulatory high one and fist bump.

Twisted Sister wallpaper (15)Twisted Justice

A tiny, independent, virtually unknown local coffee shop got a letter from the all-but-forgotten rock group Twisted Sister saying, “Knock it off!”

Jay Jay French, a founder and the business manager of the ’80s hard rock band makes it his hobby to keep an eye on the Internet for any use of the name, then sics the band’s attorney on them.

In this case, as with a lot of people, the coffee shop owner says she never even know heard of Twisted Sister and stated, “We’re not going to TAKE IT!”

Seems the band’s attorney gobbles up URL’s and scares people off with relative ease while looking for a settlement for usage of the name outside of the entertainment world. His favorite fee is $100 a year with the fee being donated to a nonprofit that supports the eye disorder his dadaltrey_woodstockughter has.

Me, I’d think the band do anything possible to keep its name in front of people. A name that I frankly would love to forget.

The Who sang “We’re Not Going to Take It” on the band’s 1969 album Tommy. Fifteen years later Twisted Sister sang its hit, “We’re Not Going to Take It” in 1984.

Don’t you just hate it when someone rips off a name for their own benefit?

Snakes Alive

Two breeds of snakes – and no, not Harley or Stan Greenberg – get an $85,000 Extreme Home Makeover in Shawnee, for a project held up since 2007 when it was learned that these two endangered breeds live in the parkland that’s become their natural habitat.  Roughly an 11 acre area.

I spoke with Johnson County Commissioner Michael Ashcraft and based on what he told me and my own research, to say the snakes “live there” is a misnomer. They are Eastern US snakes and Sjawnee sits on the far Western extreme of their border.

In fact, none of them has never been seen there.

I told Michael that as soon as this all gets approved I’m filing an injunction stating this also disrupts the home of Sasquatch, even though he’s never been seen there either.

The remodel price tag is down from the original $250K – $1.4M estimate. Only seems fitting that the project is for a sewer, since that’s where all the money seems to be going.

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12 Responses to Paul Wilson: Week in Review – Halls Plaza Bails, Ferret Fever, Sister Twists & Snakes on the Plains

  1. Jack P says:

    Paul, do you think there could be any room left over in the old Hall’s Plaza location for a Payday Loan storefront?

  2. paulwilsonkc says:

    Jack, thats brilliant! I’m really upset that “I” didnt think of that.
    It would be perfect for those random Friday night “young scholar” flashmobs, storm the Plaza, get some cash, go to Ruth’s Chris and have dinner!

  3. Jack P says:

    But will there be enough left over for a 10% tip—or (God forbid) cab fare to get back home?

  4. Orphan of the Road says:

    What about Coca-Cola going after the drug cartels over Coke’s trademark?

    I remember the Sierra Club suing a corporation because they found skeltons of an endangered species on their mining property in the desert. Suit was settled when said company agreed to cut a multi-million dollar check.

    Bob Walkenhorst (note to Smartman: I might marry him too, that is if I liked men)told me there are only so many notes and so many words. Songwriters borrow from each other often (see Guthrie, Woody). Hellsbelles, John Forgerty was asked to produce The Rainmakers’ first album (sent to him with the band listed as The Royals by their manager). He declined but expressed regret he wouldn’t be able to steal this line from Rockin’ At The T-Dance, they let the monkey go and blame the monkey wrench.

    • smartman says:

      Dunno Orphan, with a trend towards detuning guitars you can create a virtually unlimited number of notes and chords. Words are limited to a certain degree but the arrangement of those is not. And as Sting says, when it comes to songwriting, Thank God for the metaphor as it has saved us from many a self-indulging musician.

      As for Bob Walkenhorst, he is a highly under-rated song-writer. I still think the lyrics to Downstream and Let My People Go are brilliant in there simplicity.

      If only someone at Blvd Brewing had the sense to make a BIG FAT BLONDE and partner with the makers of rain they might be able to help them make it rain and deliver them from squalor.

      • Orphan of the Road says:

        You are confusing tunings and keys with notes. Note are the same just in different location on the fretboard.

        I’ve asked many a guitar player where they got their guitar. Theirs have so many more notes than mine.

        Used to buy burgers at his family’s place in Norborne as a pimply-faced kid. Never knew much about The Rainmakers in Philadelphia, other than they used Drinking On The Job at WCAU on the noon news as an exit song until the day they played after a big, AMTRACK wreck caused by a doped up engineer.

        He likes to hear what he really meant when he wrote Government Cheese.

        If they would donate some of the proceeds to charity, Boulevard’s Big Fat Blond might be a winner.

  5. chuck says:

    Check this out Paul. It is almost unbelievable.

    An IRS Agent, who can’t speak English lecturing a citizen with respect to 1st Amedment rights.

    It is hard to fathom, just how far and how sick this PC nation has fallen.

    • paulwilsonkc says:

      Chuck, I don’t even find that stuff terribly shocking any more; isn’t that a commentary all unto itself?
      I don’t play or read well for the PC crowd, Katrina flood comparison as an example.

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