New Jack City: Jack Lays Into ‘Twin Peaks,’ Swears Off Hooters

britsspearesesMy buddies called the other day and said, we’re taking you to lunch…
“Where to?” I asked.  “You’ll find out,” they hedged.

Would it going to be some new frufru eatery, I wondered.

“Don’t worry, ride with us, you’ll like it,” they promised.

So far—so good—or was it?

Why were we heading south on I-35 all the way to Olathe? I was soon to find out. They turned off at 119th Street and headed a skip-and-a-hop east where a rugged looking outdoorsman like building awaited.

TWIN PEAKS, the sign read.

Uh oh…

The lunch crowd – a gaggle of mostly dudes – was streaming into the place, not a Birkenstock in the bunch. Whereupon the hostess desk and beyond became a feast for weary eyes, with servers dressed deliciously naughty.

You know, the Britney Spears school girl look.

As the joint’s advertising suggests, “We’re not just a pretty face.” This place is Hooters on steroids, with every seat providing a knockout view.

images-6The waitress uniforms brought back memories of the cheesefest Catholic High School Girls In Trouble. Push’em up, push’em up, REAL good!

Almost forgot about the food.

It’s actually good with large servings – a bit pricey – but hey, the ticket includes that lovely feast for the eyes.

I ordered ribeye pot roast. Delicious and a generous serving to boot. A buddy went for the chicken fried steak delivered on a huge platter to fit the size of the damn thing. All he could handle was about half of the entree, taking the rest home.

Trophy trout, flat iron steak, spicy chipotle chicken, green chili meatloaf and topped off with fried pickle baskets were just some of the offerings suggested by the tempting Twin Peaks Girls—who also pitch their Twin Peaks calendars.

What about dessert, who doesn’t want a happy ending to their lunch?

No thanks, I had mine visually.

Turns out the Twin Peaks concept was more-or-less created by a former Hooters exec. Fancy that. Hooters supposedly sued him for taking company secrets with him.

Since when did T&A become a “company secret?”

image_generatorSo what do we have here?

imagesHelloooooo, a franchised Breasteraunt not unlike the Tilted Kilt Pub & Eatery, a Scottish themed dude magnet and Heart Attack Grill, where if you weigh more than 350 poiunds you eat free!
bikinisThen again, we’re not supposed to use the term Breasteraunt anymore, because it’s now a registered trademark of Bikini’s Sports Bar & Grill.

For my money, Twin Peaks makes my last experience at Hooters seem tacky by comparison.

Surprisingly our packed lunch crowd included scores of women who apparently were also taking in the culinary offerings—and probably the decorative delights as well.

Twin Peak’s Olathe location is the first franchise in the area. Based on the crowd I saw at the place, more will surely pop up in the metroplex.
It was already the third such visit to the place for the guys who dragged me there.

As Twin Peaks website suggests, “Remember, you’re the man. So get up here and enjoy the scenery at Twin Peaks.”

Explaining it to your wife or girlfriend may be another story.

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12 Responses to New Jack City: Jack Lays Into ‘Twin Peaks,’ Swears Off Hooters

  1. diggerdave says:

    Didn’t Debbie just write this story? Why would you copy the same subject? WEIRD

    • balbonis moleskine says:

      Nobody gets paid here on this site and often times people will accidentally write multiple stories on the same subject. Hearne is pretty cool about printing things that are well written with a minimal amount of editing. Most of the frequent commenters here have written one or two things for this site because we think kcc is a fun site and if we read and comment all the time the least thing we can do is give a few stories to ole Hearne. That’s about it.

  2. Super Dave says:

    Well I liked both reviews, but I am sure Glazer will come along and try to trash these comments as well calling people names.

  3. paulwilsonkc says:

    Nobody gets paid here on this site and often times people will accidentally write multiple stories on the same subject. Hearne is pretty cool about printing things that are well written with a minimal amount of editing. Most of the frequent commenters here have written one or two things for this site because we think kcc is a fun site and if we read and comment all the time the least thing we can do is give a few stories to ole Hearne. If you read closely, it even happens with comments from time to time. That’s about it.

  4. CG says:

    Super Dumb Bell I only trash you and SmartCoward. Why? You both earned it! In spades.

  5. I'm Glazers Bi tc h says:

    CG shouldn’t you be padding your comments over on TKC. When the story posts the page at 7:30 and the first positive comment is 7:31.. HAHAHAHA BUSTED!!!.. Now before you start in on how I am so lame to notice the time stamps think about how lame it is to fluff your own shit !

  6. Hearne says:

    Hey, jack was the first to suggest an column on Twin Peaks. But before he could, get it up, Mermiad sprang back to life. So you guys get two perspectives.

    Btw, some people do get paid on this site.

    If someone wants to submit something, we’ll look at it. But other than finding a foodie and fashion person, I haven’t really been looking much of late. FYI

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