This is indeed a very exciting program, and I’ll explain it by using a Q & A format:
Q. What is an Economic Stimulus payment?
A. It’s money the federal government will send to taxpayers.
Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From taxpayers.
Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?
A. Only a smidgen of it.
Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thereby stimulating the economy.
Q. But isn’t that stimulating the economy of China?
A. Shut up.
* If you spend the stimulus money at Walmart it will go to China or Sri Lanka .
* If you spend it on gasoline, it will go to the Arabs.
* If you purchase a computer, it will go to India, Taiwan or China.
* If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico, Honduras and Guatemala.
* If you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea.
* If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan.
* If you pay your credit cards off or buy stock, it will go to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.
1) Spending it at yard sales, or
2) Going to ball games, or
3) Spending it on prostitutes, or
4) Beer or
These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S.
Go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day!