As if lowlifes or the under class will rise up and burgle them. That’s why the Star always included that cryptic line by my pic when I was on vacation about my column returning when it returned.
Rather than report directly from Las Vegas with breaking news, Man Jack will only spill the beans after he’s safely returned to his Overland Park mansion, raised the drawbridge, heated the scalding oil and re-started all his newspaper subscriptions so his realm might be properly defended.
On the other hand, I have little compunction about admitting I’m gone.
In fact, I’m now on my annual summer trek to Tucson where I went to school long ago. And lest you think me a fool for summering in the desert, I’ll tell you a secret; this is monsoon season here and it’s quite pleasant during these cloudy, rainy days. And it’s not clogged with gaggles of loser, yuppie tourists. Like me, I guess.
Another guy not afraid to let the world know he’s out of town is Craig Glazer.
Craig’s in Montreal now, learning for the first time people there speak French and primping for a fetish fest. My bet is, if he goes, he won’t like it.
Glazer’s a pretty meat and potatoes kinda guy when it comes to romance, and having taken a fetish class some years back (for my column in the Star), I can’t see him putting up with the foreplay, let alone letting some stranger tie him up.
I could be wrong.
Guess we’ll find out if our stuff’s gone in a couple days when we get home.
Meanwhile, hope you guys are enjoying Brandon Leftridge batting for me (while I’m out getting robbed) as much as I am. He’s kicking all kinds of ass by my measure.
Hate to admit it, but it’s kinda fun watching as talented a writer as Brandon get hammered almost as harshly as less deserving members of our Bad News Bears. And he’s handling it all quite well.
Now a quick confession.
Several weeks back, I tried to get Miller to weigh in again a time or two. Kind of a look back after a year of hiding out in the deep south playing college prof.
Joe wanted no part of reliving his Kansas City experience.
Not even in the rear view mirror. Which is understandable, but thinking about Joe caused me to re-read a couple of his farewell screeds which I’m going to re-publish for new readers or ones who missed em the first time around.
In the meantime, I’m trapped out here in Break Into My House Land, fingers crossed.
I will tell you this much, the local alt weekly in Tucson is running complete circles around the Pitch. They’ve got page count; they’ve got ads – they’ve even got editorial content.
That despite the fact that this is the time of year when Tucson practically goes dormant while students and tourists are way out of town.
Which is more than a little sobering because Kansas City desperately needs an alternative news weekly – not just an ad rag – which obviously does not include the Star‘s Ink.
The Pitch may be a little thin-skinned and small at times – like quoting me at length in a feature story, taking a shot then leaving out that my quote was taken from KC Confidential – but it’s all Kansas City’s got.
And we need it.