Whinery: Ever Had a Gay Family Member Who Won’t Tell You They’re Gay?

I’ve got a very close blood relative who won’t tell me he’s gay…

Not that there is anything wrong or anything. It’s just that after seeing him quoted in newspapers as being gay – like MAJOR publications where this fact has been established- it just kind of bothers me.

I know, my views on many things are pretty conservative. But this relative has been President of his local chapter of the Log Cabin Republicans-which is the premier organization of Gay Republicans. For all intents and purposes, this person is even MORE conservative than I am.

He even opposes Gay Marriage, something I even support…

We both agree that gays should be given the same rights as heterosexuals and be able to form Civil Unions.

We’ve even had long discussions on how the Republican Party should be more inclusive towards the homosexual community.

And we both agree that there are probably more gay Republicans than there are Democrats. He’s even worked as a political consultant for candidates and office holders who have hostile views towards his sexual orientation.

At this point, I’m probably more hung up on his "secrecy" than he is.

Is it just not that big of a deal?

I don’t walk around introducing myself as heterosexual- so should I expect him to proclaim his sexual preferences to me? Why should he? It’s just so weird that we are as close as we are and have never talked about who we are dating with one another.

I’ve know this for about eight years now. So should I be the one that broaches the subject?  I’m just afraid that he hasn’t told me because he thinks I’m gonna disown him or something which I would never do. Or that I would not want to be included should he ever decide to get “married” or something like that.

So consider this an “Open Letter” to KC Confidential readers…

What should I do?

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17 Responses to Whinery: Ever Had a Gay Family Member Who Won’t Tell You They’re Gay?

  1. paulwilsonkc says:

    Coming from someone with a lot of gay friends,

  2. PB says:

    End of Story
    This was going to be my answer but you said it yourself…

    “I don

  3. the dude says:

    the reason why is because
    in a lot of places they are not accepted, discriminated against, cannot receive insurance benefits, death benefits, could be jailed for their activities in some places. If they want to hold parades and proclaim their gayness to the high heavens, who does that hurt? Not me. Me, I am for government holding civil unions to the same legal standing as marriage and letting churches take care of marriage. That would solve the gay marriage problem in one swoop.

    If your family member does not feel that they can talk to you about their orientation, then so be it, be supportive. You begin the conversation and let them know you have their back and support them, that’s ultimately all they need to know. Like wilson said do you feel you need to come out to this family member about your heteroness? Maybe they feel the same way.

  4. paulwilsonkc says:

    Dude, while I have no problem with gay marriage…
    … they use ALL the wrong reasoning of why it needs to be. And the two favorites I hear are:

    1. Property Rights – This has nothing to do with anything. I can buy a house and leave it to YOU if I want to. Whether I even KNOW you or not doesn’t come in to play! Its a legal contract. The Dude and I dont have to be married, have dated or be friends. I could HATE him and leave all my wordly possesions to him! Weak sauce argument.

    2. The rights to see my partner in the hospital / intensive care and be treated like family. – Once again, this is permission based activity. Who ever the patient or family leaves as names who can access the ICU, they can visit! I went with my Ex girlfriend to see her Dad in ICU. I wasn’t related, barely knew the guy at the time and sat with him for hours! Has nothing to do with marriage.

  5. the dude says:

    The whole argument of gay marriage is wrong,
    government should not be invloved in the institution of marriage as I have stated before. Marriage is an institution created by the church and should stay that way, government if they want to join people in matrimony should only be involved with civil unions. These unions share the same legal trappings as marriage, then the government can wed as many gay people as they want to.

    Unless you will your property rights to me wilson i would have no claim to your said property, if we were in a civil union you would not have to will them. Same thing goes with medical insurance and other issues that people in committed relationships would like to have that hetero couples automatically get. It comes down to fairplay and the fact that these people want equal rights as fellow human beings. We need to get past silly prejudices and religious dogma.

  6. smartman says:

    This is easy
    Ask him if he knows Harley. If he says yes it should be easy to walk him out of the closet.

  7. paulwilsonkc says:

    Smartman, I find it stark raving HIIILARIOUS
    when someone tries to use a fake name but nothing ELSE changes in the post. When there are dead give always, it makes anonymity darned near impossible! It

  8. Hot Carl says:

    Ever Had a Gay Family Member Who Won’t Tell You They’re Gay?
    No

  9. paulwilsonkc says:

    Hot Carl – Man of Few Words
    .

  10. Bob says:

    has Craig Glazer
    told you he is gay yet?

  11. chuck says:

    if you are as close to the guy as you say,
    then broaching the subject shouldn’t be that big a deal.

    “Hey! I know your fuckin gay, and I don’t give a shit. How ’bout them Chiefs!”

  12. Super Dave says:

    Hey I could care less if you are gay or not but at least act like you have some common sense about it.

    I knew gay couples before it was popular to run around saying you was gay and they acted like any other couple just was two men or either two women. They wasn’t all ate up in making damn sure you knew what they was.

    These new gay people I swear are running around saying they are gay just for the attention.

  13. bubba says:

    smartman
    come out of the closet!

  14. DSW-esq. says:

    Thank You
    You Guys are Great!

  15. PB says:

    George Michael
    “Hey! I know your fuckin gay, and I don’t give a shit. How ’bout them Chiefs!” – chuck

    Sort of reminds me of the Behind The Music episode on GM. Mind you, he had already been seen by millions prancing around in 80s-style male booty shorts, but apparently he was still in total denial about his gayness. Banging out and even living with the hot blond supermodel in that Freedom video and he still couldn’t fight his love of the cock. So much for it being a life choice. Finally, after much soul searching, he decides to come out to friends and family who basically responded with a “what took you so long?”

  16. hardly says:

    im not gay
    juts beecaus eye were pink buney slipurs……..
    an eye hav piktures of ashton kutcher in mi bedrume……
    eye go owt in pubelick dresed in wommens clohtes………
    mi frend an eye duct tape eech ohter two the bedposts……….
    eye gett a tingly fealing awl over wen eye sea glazer………………..
    im not gay

  17. REAL Harley says:

    Who am i……….
    kidding????? I aam as queer as a 3……….dollur bil……….
    i wuld slurp……. dare and glaze…….. dry…….. yum………
    slurp

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