Jolly: The Easter Bunny Left Me a Really Bad Egg at Seventy Seven South

My Easter Sunday brunch nightmare started on Good Friday around 9 pm…

I’d planned earlier to join about 15 friends at the new Swagger in Martin City. I knew a couple of the people that were opening this new hot spot, but then they told me they might not have a brunch available on Easter. Dang.

So I told my friends we needed a new Easter plan.

Unfortunately, by that time it was way too late to make a reservation at Nick and Jake’s, the Bristol, or anywhere halfway impressive. But hey, I wanted to try a new brunch anyway.

So I made a reservation for four at Seventy Seven South for 11:00 am.

This is where on the the day Christ rose from the grave my day took a turn for the worst.

Where were you on this one, Jesus%u200B?

Seventy Seven South is located at 5041 w. 135th in Leawood and has been said to be a swingers bar.

The jury’s still out on that one.

However an employee did tell me the old location that opened in 1971 at 77th and Troost (which is how they got the name) used to give out a blue candle to guests just trying to get a drink or some food and red ones to swingers.

The Troost location only lasted nine years but I don’t think its brunch had anything to do with its demise.

Still it’s a little CREEPY. I found all this out AFTER my Easter disaster. The new location has been in business for about three years and the owner Chris Arnold has ties to the old 77 South.

The new 77 South location kind of has a 70’s atmosphere to it, but not really. The bar looks nice and is the first thing you see as you enter. The patio is also very nice with patio furniture classy enough to pull it off in Leawood.

The tables are a bit generic but some of the art on the walls helps vault you back to the 70’s. Is that enough though? Overall 77 South looks like the old Dick Clark’s American Bandstand on Metcalf at 435.

 I’d had brunch at 77 South before and it was good – almost very good. Its Bloody Mary bar had lots of mixes to chose from plus plain old tomato juice that you could spice up with at least six choices of seasonings and an array of fresh vegetables and fruit to garnish it with.

The food buffet was also very nice for $17.95. There were some great breakfast and dinner selections and it was an excellent value.

However this brunch was very bad.

First off, 77 South’s every other Sunday brunch (which they stopped several months ago and just started back up) is $17.95. But for Easter they jacked it to $28.95, which is almost price gouging. To take advantage of families on a religious holiday  – and 77 South is right in front of a enormous church – that’s bush league!

I remembered how good the Bloody Marys were so I ordered one from my server, who said “ Help yourself” and disappeared. Now I know as a bartender that you certainly don’t let guests just go and pour their own drinks, so I waited about two minutes.

He came back and said this was his first brunch and he’d be right back with my glass of ice and vodka. He tried to up-sell me to a better vodka but I said no because I was going to spice it up at the Bloody Mary bar. However most of the spices and seasonings were gone. All I had to chose from was four tomato mixes, some dried up limes that were cut four days earlier and cocktail onions and green olives (which I hate more that cocktail onions).

What, no celery even? So the Bloody Mary bar was a complete disappointment.

On to the food, if you can call it that.

First we peeked at the two carving tables. There was ham and roast beef on separate stations, but the two kids carving looked like they were maybe 16 and wearing polo’s.

Can you at least put a Mexican with some kitchen experience up there and a chef”s coat on him so it looks like your trying to impress?

We passed on the meat – I never do a brunch for the carved meat anyway. 

 Then I hit the buffet lineup. Seventy Seven South had most of the traditional brunch staples like bacon, sausage, and scrambled eggs, but I wasn’t impressed. Then I had the unfortunate experience of coming across the Eggs Benedict. But by the time I got to the catering chafer there were only two in there, so I took one.

When I came back later and there was still only one. Which tells me two things.

They don’t care enough to replenish their buffet or nobody’s eating it.

Plus it wasn’t very busy which I noticed when I first came in the dining room.

The rest of the food on the buffet was disgusting at best.

There were shells and cheese for a pasta that looked like it came right out of a box. The salmon cutlets were OK but way under seasoned and there were chicken wings with no seasoning that appeared to have been maybe boiled. They were wet and soggy and made me sad to look at. Unfortunately I tried one.

This brunch was so BAD, I’ve actually had better food in jail (thank-you Overland Park Department of Corrections). 

OOOOOH, but it gets worse.

The sign outside of 77 South boasted of its fresh crab legs and shrimp. The crab legs (which I did not try but my friends did) were cooked but then just left on a big serving platter and not even close to being warm. Plus these were the smallest crab legs I have ever seen.

Have you ever seen the Deadliest Catch?

Those fishermen throw back the small crabs because it’s illegal to catch them and sell them, but I suspect some of those might have found their way to 77 South. These crabs looked bulimic and sad. And naturally, there was no warm butter to dip them in, just a dish of lemons.

Really??

At least offer it, or tell me to stay away from the shitty seafood table, because the shrimp wasn’t any better.

The shrimp tasted frozen and old and the cocktail sauce was even worse. It wasn’t a sauce, but more of a paste. Because when I tried to put my shrimp in the jelled mess it just moved around my plate, almost running away from the shrimp. The cocktail sauce was probably squeezed into that serving bowl like space food.

Seventy Seven South’s dessert table reminded me of a trailer park wedding reception.

It was made up of dry brownies and crappy pastries that looked like they came straight out of the box at Sam’s Club. I should know – I catered that joke of a wedding once. 

After my experience on Easter I will not be going back to Seventy Seven South. You know, unless I meet a super hot cougar with dentures (Insert joke here).

Seventy Seven South is also having a Mother’s Day brunch in case you really hate your MOM.

Or her name is Casey Anthony or something. That brunch is only $23.95. What a deal!!! They’re also having a DJ on Cinco de Mayo, so you can celebrate Mexico’s independence from the French in a 70’s themed bar and drink martinis.

Look, here’s how I see it; if your restaurant is next to Bonefish Grill and right behind the Gaslight Grill, you have to do better. Especially on Easter brunch. I could have waited for hours at the Gaslight Grill just to have a good to great brunch at around 3pm.

Guess I should have.

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12 Responses to Jolly: The Easter Bunny Left Me a Really Bad Egg at Seventy Seven South

  1. the dude says:

    Rumor on the street is that
    the take out buffet is to die for.

  2. newbaum turk says:

    swaggers
    Is that the same Swaggers at 84th & Wornall? Where in Martin City? If you have never been there you are missing out. Great food despite being a bar. Best ham sandwich anywhere, though the BBQ Shack in Paola rivals it. Incredible beer selection too.

  3. paulwilsonkc says:

    Dude, lets go to 77 and make them uncomfortable!
    Been there a hand full of times. One, for my brothers wedding party after party. I dont get it. It seems to have garnered some of the “beautiful people” crowd, drinks were marginal, food slightly better than marginal, all its got going for it is the patio, but I’m a sucker for a patio. If you can have a drink and a cigar, Im in, even if the rest of it sucks! 3/4 times was plenty. Im not a scenester though, that may be part of it.

  4. bschloz says:

    That picture is hot,no?

    Chuck is that you in the Royal Blue Leisure Suit?

  5. fly says:

    so, cool, a regular column for barflies.

  6. balbonis moleskine says:

    cougar hunting in KC, abridged edition
    Attention 30 something professionals. Do you work too hard for too little money? Do you need a woman a few years younger than your mom to take care of you? Do you have an old lady fetish like Soren Swissgaard from Metalocalypse? Then go to these places:

    Overland Park: Nick and Jakes

    Lees Summit: Houlihan’s

    Plaza: The piano bar at the International (ex Ritz Carlton, ex Alameda Plaza) Hotel that sits across the street from the Raphael Hotel.

  7. chuck says:

    Ha Ha Bschloz 🙂
    I actually used to go to 77 South on Troost. I thought a lady owned it though, she checked my ID at the door all the time. A blonde. I had no idea it was a “swingers” place, I would stop by after work. I liked the lady at the door. 🙂

    Ried, LMAO, Casey Anthony—– 🙂

  8. chuck says:

    By the way,
    Those pics of the old 77 South are cool, but when I went there, there were strippers.

    What can I tell ya….

  9. chuck says:

    bschloz, full disclosure.
    In the 70’s when I taught High School, I wore Leisure Suits.

    Very comfortable.

    Colorful.

    I really liked the shoes. I am a short sawed off little bastard, and the shoes were huge. Big heels, thick soles, I damn near hit 5′ 10″ tall.

    PLUS, back then, I had hair! Man was that cool.

    I lost it, but I used to have a picture of me, on my way to Walter Mitty’s with hair, a HUGE white belt, bell bottoms from hell (They were plaid.), and shoes that must have weighed 10 pounds.

    As the decades flew by, I would look at that picture and think no one on earth ever looked any more stupid. Then came Hip/Hop.

    The next fad in clothing, will be a guy walking down the street with his pants down around his ass, with his prick hanging out.

  10. sean says:

    Scenester?
    WTF? This place doesn’t have pretty people a few maybe but mostly WAR Horses and the lady’s who call themselves athletic on their online profile. You are not toned you can squeeze your ass in that dress, just means it can stretch enough to fit your fat ass

  11. bschloz says:

    @Chuck @Scene
    Pretty sure Leisure Poly was banned by the Clinton Admin. (something about being highly flamable)
    You just don’t see it around anymore, despite its very comfortable stretchy nature. http://tinyurl.com/d7qjm3x

    Hearne — I would like to submit the idea for KCC Summer 70’s bash at 77
    It would be great if @Paul @Harley sans legal counsel could work together to co chair this event.
    Lets kick it off with Craig & Stan Glazer parachuting onto the CVS parking lot. All proceeds to charity…of course.

  12. paulwilsonkc says:

    bschloz – as of 3:00 or so yesterday, problem solved…
    ,,,and notice, I’m still here. That should tell you something. It will be real quiet and back to normal for some time to come!

    @Sean – that wasn’t an indictment on 77, just what it looked like on the 3 times I went.

    @Chuck, is that why you told me you used to buy red candles by the case? That statement never made sense to me until jusssssst now.

    @Blogonous – If my wife didnt mind, I’d check into that cougar action, but they girls would have to be 85 to qualify in MY CASE!!

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