Joe Rogan had a hit single called "Voodoo Punanny"…
It’s a comedy song about not being able to stay away from a hot chick that’s simply not good for you, but the sex is too strong to stay away. In my case in recent years that person has been BLACK BARBIE.
I met her just after my divorce. Hearne and I were at the Police concert at Sprint and I got a call from Temptations manager David Rice. The strip club was nearby and he said, "Craig I got a 10 – a 19 year-old stripper from Texas. And I showed her your photo online and she went crazy. She loves Al Pacino and thinks you look like him. Come over and meet her NOW!"
Maybe owning Stanford’s, driving a hot car and having a book out didn’t hurt either.
When I walked in and saw her, she stood nearly six feet tall. She had an unreal body, was very pretty, exotic and, in a strange way sweet, always smiling and soft.
Anyways…IT WAS ON!
We dated for real – if you can really date a dancer – for nearly a year. She moved near to me, stopped dancing and then…hey she was 19…what are you gonna do?
It had no future – just too many negatives, the obvious – but boy we had some fun.
Then just after New Year’s 2010 it kinda died. We went back to our normal lives, me doing what I do, her back to dancing. She came to the club once to see Carlos Mencia, but that was about it….
I think most of you guys can relate.
Girls have had their bad boys too, but I did miss her.
Then it happened.
A week ago Barbie called and said please come to the club and see me.
I really don’t like strip clubs much. I’ve dated dancers and that wild type for years, even in LA. But I met almost all of them at bars or parties or my club, not in a strip joint. That usually never works, but this one kinda did.
Barbie told me her boyfriend just got 20 years (what a surprise) and would I give her a second chance.
So I took her to Stanford’s this past weekend and saw the Crank Yankers. Then we went to the new Hollywood Casino – it’s a fun place and was packed – and we met up with Johnny Dare (who also thinks Barbie’s a hot dish, he met her with me at Rock Fest couple years back).
Johnny had his group – he gets mobbed by fans everywhere for photos and autographs, even there – and the comics came up as well so we all had a fun time. And that damn Dare wins even at slots…go figure. We all won a few bucks.
I took Barbie back to my place afterwards and even my dog Junior was glad to see her….
Will this be Voodoo Punanny part Two?
Stay tuned, I’m sure this will lead to some real headaches. Some times you know better but you can’t stay away.
Hey, we only live once.