Starbeams: THE TOP 5 WAYS TO KEEP A GORILLA CONTAINED @ KC ZOO

The Great Gorilla Escape from the Kansas City Zoo has been blamed on a failure to lock two cage doors.
 
THE TOP 5 WAYS TO KEEP A GORILLA CONTAINED:
 
#5.  Inform him that a dangerous man is on the loose in Swope Park.
 
#4.  Tell him you’re working a deal to get him on the roof for a Toyotathon.
 
#3.  Ask him to explain why the apes on "Planet of the Apes" had English accents.
 
#2.  Tell him to eventually type the complete works of Shakespeare.
 
#1.  Gorilla Glue.

Kelly Urich is the morning show host on The Point 99.7 FM

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3 Responses to Starbeams: THE TOP 5 WAYS TO KEEP A GORILLA CONTAINED @ KC ZOO

  1. scared of the truth. says:

    Is it just me, or, is that monkey pissed off?
    Of course he is pissed off.

    Stupid white people!!

  2. tiad says:

    tiad says:
    #1a. Tell him if he stays out on the loose, he’ll have to read Kelly Urich posts.

  3. BarKeeper says:

    It’s Easy
    Con the idiot half-wit taxpayers into blindly voting in another unnecessary sales tax increase, because it makes ’em feel so good.

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