Hearne: Mission Improbable, Taking It To The Imax

Let me begin by saying this is not a movie review…

However, I did see the new Tom Cruise movie Mission Impossible last night. In all its Imax glory. Jack had assured me it was top notch – and I won’t argue that – however I’ll pass along a few things worth noting.

Starting with the intense opening scene.

Without getting into the specifics, I will tell you this; the volume at at AMC’s Studio 30 in Olathe was kinda painful. To the point of being annoying. That from a guy who has a lifetime achievement award for blasting movies and music at sound pressure levels that many find offensive.

It wasn’t a quality type of deafening either. Rather it was harsh and heavy with too much emphasis on higher and midrange frequencies.

Something had to be wrong.

So wrong that I actually left the theater to tip off an AMC staffer that he might want to look into it.

"I’ll check it out," he said. "But the Imax is set at a certain level."

And so it went. After a while it sorta seemed normal. Really loud normal. So much that the GF said she felt like she’d just left an incredibly loud rock concert.

So if getting your ears blasted half off is something that sounds less than appealing, you may want to save a few bucks and opt for the standard issue Mission Impossible, which I believe opens today.

As for the Imax experience, only portions of the movie were shot in Imax, Jack says. And you can tell. Some of the panoramic scenes of Dubai are breathtaking. As were a number of the key action sequences. I guess they save a lot of money by not doing the entire movie in Imax, but it’s spectacular enough at times, that if you can weather the sound storm, go for it. Or maybe try the old napkins in the ears trick.

Did you know Tom Cruise turns 50 this coming July?

Knowing that going in I was curious to see how he looked. Cruise still looks pretty young, but nothing like in the original Mission Impossible 15 years ago. Or even five years back in Mission Impossible III.

While Cruise still looks good he’s no Ashton Kutcher.

So when you see the wildly improbable stunts and feats of daring he allegedly accomplishes as a 50 year-old dude, well, seeing is far from believing. In one scene in which Cruise wears a beard, one of the side shots make him look a little like a young Tom Selleck.

I say young because Selleck is 66 now.

However he was only 35 when he first starred in the television series Magnum P.I. and 43 when it ended. And Selleck didn’t fake do 100th of the feats we’re supposed to believe Cruise pulls off with barely a single, minor, fleeting concussion.

So be sure to engage your suspension of disbelief.

Quick aside; the rich dude who tries to bed co-star Paula Patton looks an awful lot like Mancow.

I’d like to not give away the ending, but I can’t stop myself.

Why didn’t they just quit while they were ahead? At well over two hours in length, the movie is already a bit long. Yet instead of going out clean, they tacked on a tres queer, post action, buddy scene and added some nonsense about Cruise relationship with his supposedly dead wife. Why? Who cares at that point?

If time is of the essence, you may want to cut out after all the bad guys are dead and clear the ringing sound from your head.

That is, if you go to the Imax version and that AMC dude was telling me the truth about the sound being pre-set.

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5 Responses to Hearne: Mission Improbable, Taking It To The Imax

  1. chuck says:

    I went to Yahoo Movies
    and watched Cruise jump outta that building several times.

    Holy shit.

    Ya gotta give the guy a few props. I get butterflies watchin it here on my monitor.

  2. Brandy says:

    those were the days
    Hollywood, 1987. Used to hop all over Sunset strip with Selleck and kansas citys’ own Craig Glazer. They called them “Slick Selleck and Crazy-Glaze!”. And boy we had some TIMES. True story. My lesson is? You can’t keep your looks forever. But some men are just like a fine wine – they get better with age. Until a certain point and they taste like vinegar and you have to throw them out. But those were good years.

  3. smartman says:

    Tom Cruises
    Two words, GREEN SCREEN! Three letters CGI. The Church of Scientology is not gonna let their meal ticket do anything to destroy his donating power. The “church” has representatives on all of Tom’s shoots looking out for their “mutual best interests”. Don’t believe all the hype that he does his own stunts any more than the hype that he’s not GAY.

  4. Hearne Christopher says:

    There’s no question that he didn’t do the stunts. And once you see it, you may agree that nobody probably did most, if not all, of the ridiculously preposterous ones. And lived to tell the story.

    So why force moviegoers to have to dial in the believability, knowing that’s it just too far over the top. Or why not just make Cruise a superheroe and be done with it.

  5. PB says:

    Green Screen?
    While I’m sure effects were used in various sequences, believe it or not, some real stunts were performed by the actors (not doubles) in this film. Look, obviously every safety precaution known to man was used in that building scene with Cruise so yes, the term “death-defying” might be a stretch, but it is a FACT that Mr.Cruise did indeed dangle and perform some stunts 130-floors above Dubai. Do I think it’s that big of a deal, not really as I would probably let myself be dangled naked with nothing more than a couple of used bungee cords for even half of the $ that Cruise made on this picture.

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