Tracy: Thunder, Lightning and No Poncho Douse Guys & Dolls @ Starlight

So there I was, alive and kicking at Starlight Theatre last night…

When the breeze kicked in, the temps dropped blessedly from 97 degree weenie roast weather to something approaching liveable. But by song #7 – the theme to “Guys & Dolls” – the constant lightning and thunder rolling in began to frighten the assembled masses.  (The true chickens in the audience walked out early, during Adelaide’s Lament, about psychosomatic illnesses. Figures.)

Management suspended the show and it was later declared a rain out. 

Too bad, because Guys and Dolls IS the undisputed best American musical ever. 

Oh and, sorry, Harley–I was NOT struck by lightning.  But even the props in the best song in the musical – “Sit Down You’re Rockin’ the Boat” – would have sank or capsized had the show gone on. 

Now take my advice and try to see it before it closes Sunday. 

The weekend forecast is clear.  You’ll know many of the songs, including "Sue Me," "Luck Be a Lady Tonight," and Craig Glazer’s theme song: "I’ve Never Been in Love Before."

Guys and Dolls is a romantic comedy based on New York City in the 1940’s.  Nathan Detroit is hunting for a place for the (sing it with me now in barbershop harmony) “oldest remaining permanent floating crap game in New York,” while stringing along Miss Adelaide, his fiancée of 14 years.  Craig could nail this part.  Frank Sinatra played him in the movie.  Detroit, not Glazer.  But then, Craig could also play Sky Masterson, suave gambler courting Miss Sarah Brown, a prude who runs the local Salvation Army.  He wins the $1,000 bet by taking her to Havana for dinner.   

The actor/singers at Starlight are prime players from Broadway’s best shows. 

I’d list their names, but who cares.  An ape could do this.  You can’t screw it up.  I’ve seen Guys & Dolls five times, including 1992 on Broadway with Nathan Lane as Nathan Detroit.  He was so obsessed with being cast to play this part, he changed his name from Joseph Lane to Nathan Lane.  True story. 

I saw the play at the New Theatre in the late 90’s, I think. When they brought in the $200,000 costumes from a NY revival.  Zuit suits in day-glo colors.  Awesome–best ever.  Whereas the costumes at Starlight were a bit drab and boring. 

Oh well, with perfect music and good microphones, who cares?

The Starlight sets were knockout, using the oversized stage and grand lighting to best advantage.  And I loved the dames who paraded out two plastic Cavalier King Charles spaniels on sticks.  (Like at the Missouri State Fair if Mission Hills matrons were to attend.)

The singing was in tune and sassy. 

And even if the cast somehow forget the lyrics, the audience could just leap onstage or shout out the words from their seats.  Like they do at the Rocky Horror Picture Show.

Only the Starlight crowd don’t travel with Bic lighters, just ponchos. If they’re smart.

So yes, Hearne was right–I should have taken a poncho. 

You can always sit on it and the new seats are very comfy and have drink holders. However, wine is $10 and lemonade (at the stands that stock it) is $6.50.  And you’re not allowed to open your umbrellas.

 Tickets start at $10, so take your gal to Guys and Dolls –and remember what I told you — you will get laid. 


Tracy Thomas


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7 Responses to Tracy: Thunder, Lightning and No Poncho Douse Guys & Dolls @ Starlight

  1. smartman says:

    Guys&Dolls Better Than CATS
    If WalMart was in the theatre, or should I say
    THEE-AY-TER business it would be Starlight.

    Starlight just SHITS on the whole concept of a PROPER Theatrical Experience. Being able to actually hear and discern dialog and lyrics and God forbid pick up on the subtle and nuanced facial expressions between characters. All without sweating like Patrick Ewing playing 1 on 1 at The Rucker in August.

    Watching a play at Starlight is like having sex with a leaking inflatable doll with three condoms on. It’s not really much fun for anyone. At least that’s what Jimmy Kimmel said.

    A Hyundai Sonata ain’t an Audi A8 and Starlight is not a THEATRE

  2. gene says:

    leaking inflatable doll?
    Now wait just a minute. Having sex with a leaking inflatable doll with three condoms on isn’t such a bad thing. Hasn’t stopped Hearne’s journeys to Topeka.

  3. Hearne Christopher says:

    Nor has it sparked any

  4. bschloz says:

    Summer In The City
    Nice Post…sounds like a good night.

    Sweating like Patrick Ewing ..LOL
    Sweating like Angelo Mozilo at the beach
    Sweating like Charles Barkley putting for $1,000
    Sweating like a blind lesbian at a fish market.

  5. jack p. says:

    Something about that sweating blind lesbian at the fish market—-that’s just so wrong..

  6. smartman says:

    That’s a great idea for a challenge on Fear Factor! Men versus women, who can tell the difference between the Red Snapper and the Carp.

  7. jack p. says:

    So much for dinner at Red Lobster tonight.

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