Hearne: Don’t Waste Your Money on Hangover Part 2

Look, I worship at the alter of Jack Poessiger’s reviews as much as the next guy…

More so, actually. Which isn’t to say we’re in lock step on each and every movie. Frankly, Jack has better taste than me. I mean, in movies. Other than his tendency to laugh hillariously at fart humor. But in my humble opinion, his relatively rave review of Hangover 2 was completely off the mark.

It sucked.

Don’t take my word for it. In a crowded Dickinson Palazzo theater this evening, I sat stone faced, listening intently to little to the audience reaction of very little no laughter. It’s a good thing movie studios are able to front load the box office by opening on so many screens. Everybody races to the muliplex and parts company with their cash the first weekend before word of mouth has a chance to spread.

In the old days – like the 1990s and before – fewer screens meant long lines and weeks of boffo box offices.

If, that is, the word of mouth held up.

If the movie sucked, or was just so-so, the falloff would be greater because far fewer people would go. By the time anybody has a chance to kick this dog around at the office or wherever they’ll have taken the money and run.

Allow me to share the opinion of Hangover 2 by a 30-something, single woman who loved the original.

"I’d give it a four out of 10," she says. "The pictures at the end of the movie during the credits were the funniest part but the rest of the movie didn’t live up to those pictures."

Where Hangover 2 went wrong:

"The first one was unexpected. This one was formulaic. And this one relied too much on depravity for depravity’s sake. It just wasn’t that funny. And the audience at the theater was flat. I heard a few chuckles here and there but nothing like the first Hangover. The first one I was like laughing out loud so hard I thought I was going to pee my pants. It was shock and awe and hysterics. And this one was more disbelief at how unfunny it was."

 

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20 Responses to Hearne: Don’t Waste Your Money on Hangover Part 2

  1. smartman says:

    Dark at the Cinemark
    Lots of um….knee grows…wink wink seeing this movie on the Plaza. Wassup wit dat Monkey Man? I know you brothas like the Oriental spinner poon so maybe that’s the hook. Don’t Tyler Perry have a new joint out ya’ll can see? They actually had a cracker asking to see stubs on the way into the theater. That’s a sure sign they’s a double dippin’. Once they add strawberry soda, catfish nuggets and pork rinds to the concession menu you can kiss that joint goodbye. Not exactly Animal House or Blazing Saddles quality but for $6.00 I can’t complain. The acting was AWFUL; forced and contrived. Watching the movie was, at times, as painful as listening to Nick Wright.

    The monkey was the best actor so what’s that tell ya?

    Just like that douche Scotty McCreary winning American Idol Hangover 2’s box office proves how low the bar is for what we consider quality entertainment. Until we demand better we’re going to keep getting fed a steady stream of shit out of Hollywood but they still haven’t started shooting King of Sting. Go figure?

  2. C says:

    I liked it…
    This middle aged married mom laughed at it (and with an IQ of 130+). You don’t go in expecting an Academy Award winning movie with this, and if you can just go along with it, it’s, what, 2 hours of no thinking.

    The crowd at the theater we went to laughed throughout, in all the right places. It wasn’t great; it wasn’t the worst movie I’ve ever seen. Definitely wouldn’t have felt cheated even if it wasn’t matinee prices. “Limitless”, however, was overpriced at the cheapest price.

  3. Hearne says:

    Uh, nice try but wrong…
    Middle age married mom? Where do some of you guys come up with this stuff. Try a 30-something, single girl in marketing. Who laughed her ass off at the first one and even the previews for this one.

    There was some crowd laughter, sure. But faint by comparison to the original. Way faint.

    Nobody was there to be enlightened. It was, as you say, an escape movie. But how about not being boringly formulaic? The problem with this movie is the first one was excellent and the expectations for this one were high.

    Two hours of no thinking? Like that’s some kind of cinematic accomplishment? Please.

    Actually, no thinking would have been kinda nice. Better than constantly be reminded that we were being sucked in on a second rate money grab.

  4. bschloz says:

    He Who Walk Sideways Thru Turnstile…….
    Can’t somebody make a Deadwood movie–Or do about 6 hours of Justified—-
    130 million…did I read that correctly?
    Hit the 7:30 with 3 boys = $42 same show except this one is in Bangkok— maybe it would of been funnier at midnight on Thursday.

  5. Markus Aurelius says:

    Hearne, why would you think it would be anything other than
    an amplified version of the first movie? Anyone who paid for a ticket and didn’t expect more of the same type of humor after seeing the trailer on TV for weeks (except for tweaking the shock- value dial up from 10 to 11) is too easily parted from their money. You have a right to be disappointed but not a right to be surprised that you’re disappointed.

  6. That Guy says:

    I thought the first movie was stupid…
    Stupid plot – “You buddy doese everyone with a memeory loss drug( I would have beated him into death for doing that shit) then the morons keep on drinking until they black….. oh yeah… always a good idea….. so fucking funny….. great movie??? …oh how will hollywood ever top it??? what to do……. what to do?… VIOLA….. the super geniuses in hollywood some how, creativley brain storm and come up with another idea….. A SEQUAL!!!! HOW DO THEY DO IT??!!! . are they born this smart or is there school about how to be a hollywood producer, they are so amazing… Gotta be in awe of how smart hey are…. wow , they made a movie that grossed 146 million,,,,sheer genius

    VIOLA!!!!!! 146 MILLION SPENT BY THE MORON AMERICANS…… anyone who thinks this schlock is a good movie is an idiot,,, be proud of your selves you stupid fucking Americans Idioits, I am ashamed to have you as fellow citizens, you stupid fuck heads would not know a good movie if it was shoved up your asses…. WHY AM I PISSED???? Because you morons support this stupitiy ONLY LEADS to more shit EXACTLY LIKE IT!!!! THANKS … THNAKS FOR ALLOWING THE FUCKHEADS IN HOLLYWOOD TO NOT HAVE TO ONE SINGLE CREATIVE THOUGHT, AND THEY CAN MAKE MIILIONS, becasue the American public are idiots…

    DID ANYIONE ELSE NOTICE!!??….
    EVERY FUCKING “BIG MOVIE” COMING OUT THIS FUCKING SUMMER IS A GD DAMNED SEQUAL!!! HAVE YOU LOOKED??!!! …and until the movie ticket buying public boycottts this shit, that is all we will ever get…… thanks you all you fucking morons…

    I am just happy that Hearne is not being addressed here, he alone is willing to say it “THE KING HAS NO CLOTHES ON” IT IS A LIE……. I did not rail on Jack, about this, but…uh…. becasue he is a good guy, I like Jack,,,,,,, but I can no longer trust his reviews…..he likes (or is paid to like ) everything he reivews, whne was the last time he told the truth about a shitty movie?? He like everything…… including the shit fest known as hangover II…. it is a debacle

  7. jjskck says:

    I heard for weeks how great the first movie was, so I figured I might as well see it. While it was certainly amusing at times, I found myself wondering whether I saw the same most awesomely hilarious movie ever.

    Ultimately, it was the same thing over and over again: shocking situation, followed by guys looking at each other incredulously and yelling, “What the F was that???” Since this sequel looks like more of the same, I might Redbox it someday.

  8. The Independent Rage says:

    Fart humor can be funny until you have a five-year-old going around saying “fart butt, fart butt, fart butt” all day long, week after week. Then it starts to lose a bit of its general appeal.

  9. Terrance and Phillip says:

    fart butt, fart butt, fart butt
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  10. funny says:

    I just think it’s funny that this site/blog has someone who’s job is to write movie reviews and then Hearne gets on here and completely contradicts him. You never see a food critic write a review and then someone from the same paper/magazine/site get on there and say ‘wrong! that place sucks! don’t waste your money!’

  11. Variety says:

    Variety is the spice of life, multi opinions are important…..
    and I think it shows the quality of this site that one opinion
    contradicts the other … It shows honesty…intregrity……. try it sometime.

  12. but I wont says:

    point is
    integrity and honesty are strangers to much of this site. Scuse the typos in my previous response…. On second thought, go blow a goat.

  13. Hearne Christopher says:

    Hold it right there…

    You’re right. Sequels usually suck. Guess I forgot.

    Same type of humor? I was ready. Same almost exact plot of weaker jokes? Not so much.

    Not sure I understand the part about my having a right to be disappointed but not to be surprised. Guess I’ll have to plead naivete

  14. Hearne Christopher says:

    Trust me on this; Jack isn’t paid to like anything.

    Not that I haven’t tried to bribe him….kidding!

  15. Hearne Christopher says:

    Agree again

  16. Hearne Christopher says:

    agree

  17. Hearne Christopher says:

    You’re right!

    Totally.

    Why should there be differing opinions anyway?

  18. Hearne Christopher says:

    You probably did go on all night. But the pics I posted were posted on Facebook by the “kids” friends and family, well after he was buried.

  19. jack p. says:

    Looking back
    I had initially predicted a 5 day holiday weekend gross of $ 110 million. Then I upped it to $120 million. Following our screening I raised it again—this time to $130 million but predicting for the film to be very much ‘frontloaded.!!’. I was still low. American moviegoers dished out $137+ million through Memorial Day…with 2 days to go to complete the first week.
    As to exit research and reactions? CinemaScore polled it at an ‘A-‘

  20. chuck says:

    bschloz
    Deadwood was so cool…

    I loved teh mayor’s sililoquys. EB Farnum, is William Sanderson. I just watched Blade Runner again the other day, Sanderson is in that pic too.

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