The apology has been offered…
Now it’s time to learn what author, scholar, former Pitch top gun and one-time political operative Joe Miller really thinks. Starting with, does Miller think KC mayor Mark Funkhouser could have delivered the goods – "a city that works" – if he’d not had to deal with the neverending controversies and distractions of wife, First Lady Gloria Squitiro?
"My sense is to say no," Miller says. "But if he didn’t have her up there and got rid of me and Kendrick Blackwood and got someone who knew politics instead, maybe. But he’s a real uncooperative guy."
What about the talk that Hizzonor and his wife had sex in the mayor’s office – true or false?
True, Miller says.
"Gloria told me they did, yeah," Miller says. "She said that was one of the first things she insisted they do and he was real nervous about it. But they were both real open about (sex)."
One example of the Funkhouser’s openness concerns the deflowering of their teenage daughter, Miller says.
"Basically, it was pretty much a full family ceremony," Miller says. "They drove the guy down to their cabin which was about six hours away. That itself was pretty unusual. And they put a tent outside for them – it was a family sanctioned thing. So they knew what was happening while it was happening."
Back to politics and City Hall…
Could Funk’s political dream – including those of his supporters, like Miller – ever have been realized?
"Maybe," Miller says. "It depends on who he had working in his office, but he probably would have struggled for the first two or three years even then."
One problem was that Funk was under contract to write an auditing book when he took office, Miller says.
"And he was supposed to have finished it between the end of the campaign and the time he entered office. But he was too tired. So when he got into office he was like, ‘Oh shit, I’ve got to finish this book.’ And he wanted the money, so he wasn’t around that much his first month in office – he was home writing the book. I mean, he’d come in during the afternoons but it was real frustrating for all of us."
Which started Funk off on the wrong foot with City Councilers, some of whom had been in his corner, Miller says.
"I don’t know, the council is weird. The council attracts people that are – you know – a little self-interested. So you can’t lay it all at Mark’s feet because he came into office with four experienced councilmembers. All of whom were very experienced at City Hall politics and at fucking people over. And all of whom wanted to be mayor pro tem.
"And Mark could only appoint one of them, so the other three started working against him and they were real good at it. Ed Ford, Terry Riley and John Sharp."
As for Funk’s future, "Well, I would imagine he’ll get a professorship somewhere," Miller says. "And I would imagine academia would be glad to have him and he’ll do a great job."
Long as he’s imagining, does Miller think deep down Funk and fam are happy he wasn’t re-elected?
"I have no idea," Miller says. "But he probably will be in the long run."