Glazer: How to Date Six to Seven Women at the Same Time & Live to Tell the Story

So you want to have a ton of girlfriends, eh?

Most men do. That’s why they want to be some sort of star or wealthy or both. Oh, we want the dough alright, but mostly because it gives us a longer shot at being in demand with the ladies. Looks certainly help but women love a guy who’s an ‘it’ man – be it local or national.

Now let’s take a gander inside the life of a guy who for years has had a stable or bullpen of girlfriends.

Me.

But before the haters unleash themselves, let me say this; when I was in committed relationships I was loyal. For real. However during most of my adult life I have not been in long term relationships. Yes, I was married to a great lady named Connie for five years. I was already in my late 40s and she was in her low 20s – a tough long term jump. We ended our marriage because we both knew it wasn’t working. So before the cheating hit, it was better to move on and remain friends, and we did that.

Now back to the present…

When you have sex with several different women at the same time – and keep rotating them in and out – you’re always on the lookout for that next special gal.  You find her – or so you think – and somehow she usually just ends up a member of the group, or says no and moves on. Or you do.

It’s not about cheating or lying to these women. Usually a "lead," public girlfriend that you take out and are seen with. But they all know there are other girls, it’s just unspoken. Most of the relationships are based on sex – there are very few dates per se. And I rarely go to

The measure of success in this world is simple; how many, how long and are they hot? Right? Right!
 
Now here’s what makes it a JOB.

Some people don’t want kids because it’s too much responsibility. You have to live vicariously through the children at some point. And a good parent dedicates themself to the child or children their entire life. That’s fine, if that’s who you are or can be….

With multiple girlfriends, in effect, you’re kinda doing the same thing. But it’s not that simple. On one hand you’re not stuck with that one special someone to lord over. On the other, you’ve got all these different people who drive you crazy.

Yes, you get to have sex with them (and I do). Yes, they are trained to come over, screw and leave (for the most part). But none of that eliminates their feelings that you are somehow responsible for them.

So I get the calls. "Craig, man guess what, my mom got in a wreck – I don’t know what to do. The car is in the shop, she’s in the hospital and boy, you won’t believe what happened (now the one hour story). "  

Next comes the call from Girl No. 2.

"Hi, I pulled up to the store minding my own business and you won’t believe it – yes I will – a guy came outta nowhere, hit my car, major damage and then he took off, can you…."

Then Girl No. 3.

"I’ve called you all week, you never answer, are you avoiding me? I’ll call work and you left me a voice mail that you were at work, but then they said you weren’t."

Love those.

Now Girl No. 4:

"My boyfriend got fired from his job and we are so broke. Any chance you could give me a part time job or …"

Girl No. 5.

"You always want me to come over and hang with you late at night – I have a kid and she needs to be looked after – don’t you know how hard that is?" 

The great thing is when they all call in on the same day with their problems.

And those problems never end. EVER. Young or in their 30’s or 40’s it’s problem city every day. One after another, after another. And they look at you like a deer in the headlights and want you to solve their problems. But what can I do? Hit a button and say, "Your mom’s not an alcoholic."

So why not just settle for one girl? 

Because it always dies out, doesn’t it?  Relationships are tough and don’t last. Some of you will say, "Well, if you find the right girl" I have before and it still didn’t go the distance.

By the way, the girls I was serious about have never been strippers or worse, ever.

Yes, I’ve dated female lawyers, nurses, women with their own businesses who didn’t need my financial aid. They still drove me nuts.

Back to the girl go round…

For starters, you have to juggle your schedule to kinda please the crew. And brother as you pass age 30, fucking every night becomes a job. It does. Now try 40 and then 50. Christ! It’s work, work, work most nights. And sometimes I’d rather just watch a great sports game and have my dog Jr. sit on my lap.

Really, it’s a lot less hassle.

But the calls always come. You feel guilty. Don’t want to lose a player, so you cave in and let one of them come over. Now it becomes a game of what to do when they won’t leave. Christ!

Bullpen girls rarely spend the night – sometimes – but not often. Maybe in the early days when they’re "girlfriends" they do, but not for very long. The best ones are those who have boyfriends so they don’t drive you quite as crazy. Don’t get me wrong, they still bug you.

The measure of being good at this – for a real playboy, player, womanizer or whatever you want to call it – is keeping the ladies coming back for well, years.

I have some today that I dated and/or messed with when they were in their late teens, early 20s. Today I see them and those girls are l5-20 years older. Sure they leave you, even get married, but for some reason they find their way back.

Who knows why. Maybe the memory of their youth. Not sure. 

Lets do Part 2 of this in the near future. I just got a call from one of the girls in the bullpen and her car broke down and she needs a ride…..Christ…..the option is getting married and living a life of quiet desperation. Sad but true, 95% of the time.

Wish it were different. Maybe it’s me.

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110 Responses to Glazer: How to Date Six to Seven Women at the Same Time & Live to Tell the Story

  1. Super Dave says:

    Say What?
    I read this and wonder how you are alive and still around to write this story or maybe part two at a later date. Once this story gets around you may not be either.

    Truth be known I have and do know guys like you so you don’t have a copyright on this type lifestyle.

    I did date two women once at the same time then it all came to a head and something had to be done about it so I walked away from both of them. Was the two most unreal days of my life.

    Guess we will see how many women read KCC now.

  2. smartman says:

    Toulouse
    I feel sorry for you Craig. It’s like you’ve got it all except that one last piece of the puzzle. In my mid 30’s I had 4 going at one time. Screw that! I would prefer solitary confinement in a gulag in Vladivostok to going through that again. Since most of the sex was drug and booze influenced and enhanced it was pretty much all the same. You’re right about the problem phone calls. They are 24/7. I figured that each call cost me at least $100.00 in real cash or time.

    Any man can please a woman for a night. It takes a skilled lover to please the same woman for a lifetime. There is something very special and profound about relationships of 10, 25 and 50 years. Props to everyone that keeps love alive. As the late Randy Pausch said in The Last Lecture, “until you can put someone else’s happiness ahead of your own, you’ll never find true love and experience a lasting relationship.

    Good luck and remember don’t be silly, wrap that willy. No cooch is worth dying for or even having the damn Q-Tip shoved down your urethra.

  3. jjskck says:

    Correlation
    The type of woman who wants to be seen with an “it” guy is the same type of woman who calls you asking for money. They’re interested in status and flaunting, and let’s be honest: a much-younger girl isn’t with an older guy because they have SO much in common.

    The player stuff was fun in college, but it got old before long. My life is so much better and healthier now that I’m married to the right person.

  4. harley says:

    THANK GOD….
    YOU listened to my advice and got back to writing about your love life.
    You are the king of sting (with your stinger!)
    For some reason we’ve got to go have drink.
    Lets get updated though. These photos of you are bad.
    1. black barbie….glazer that had to be the lowest point in your life.
    you can do better.
    2. the asian chick. get rid of the phony leather coat…go to valentinos
    on the plaza and get some cool threads.
    3. maria: forget her…too snooty. Put her in your bullpen and call her
    when you need ” relief” of course mexican woman are pretty sloppy
    in the rack.
    4. the older blonde…not a good pic for a pimp like you. Next time try
    glamour shots…this photo makes you look old and worn…maybe
    too much sun when you were younger….before having photos taken
    be sure the lighting is just right.
    5. the sunglass photo…gotta give you congrats…she looks like the
    girl next door…sweet….but hows she in the rack.
    Despite our constant badgering…you are cool. Gotta give ya credit…
    you’re doing what makes ya happy but hopefully you’ll find someone
    who will be there when you need help and old.
    Keep writing about the hot spots…heard of 77 south..what do ya think?
    come out to sullivans on a thuirsday night…all the swinger broads come out
    looking for sex….you’d fit right in.
    Keep up the good posts like this one….because you shure don’t know shit
    about sports (lol)
    your good buddy
    Harley

  5. Maureen says:

    Thanks for Having a Big Mouth
    First thank you for leaving my photo out of this Craig. As you know I was not one who came back when we were finished. Correct. Yes I knew you had many girlfriends when I met you and your pal Hearne a couple years ago. As you know and leave out, some of us hot gals have several boyfriends. I did. Sure I was willing to make you the ONE, but I guess you felt I was a ‘no go’ never knew why. I never called and complained to you or asked for anything did I? Mostly this just pisses me off that you are somehow the expert and us girls the experiment. Bullshit. We use you and you use us. Even trade. One of these guys mentioned age and older guy or a ‘somebody’ in your case that didn’t apply with me. I thought you were hot and liked you for you. I knew little about you when we met. Some, not much.

    I did you many favors, remember. At 30 I felt I was about the right age for you. Remember the attention I got at your club? At the pool. Sure you do. I think you are a broken hearted person, someone did you wrong years back and you never let that shit go. You date all these women so YOU won’t get hurt. Guess what that won’t work Craig. I’m glad this all makes you happy or whatever. You shouldn’t post these photos that is wrong and in a way cruel. How would you like to be ONE of many on some girls website? Doesn’t feel too good. Good luck. Don’t bother to call me, this story did it for me. I don’t think you are a bad guy, I think you want everyone to love you and in the end you will have, as you said, Jr. the dog.

  6. Bad Ass Jew, Berkowitz says:

    Major Fun Story Glaze
    Hey even Harley liked it, by the way I think you look aces in some of these pictures. Nice selection of woman. I want a couple. Damn I’m married. I think you are right about marriage its tough. I love my wife, but most of my friends are now divorced trying to do a little of what you do, tough work.

  7. Monkey Man says:

    Love You Glazer
    This is so excellent, I’m gonna smoke a J and re read this sucker. Good stuff brother.

  8. Coo Koo says:

    Thats What I’m Talkin Bout
    Oh yeah this is what I was waitng for man. Love the crap out of you and Johnny Dare, bet he can add some nice stories to this one

  9. cowboy says:

    Stud Muffin
    Better hide this week.

  10. Black Barbie says:

    Leave Me Out of This Thing
    Why you got to put my picture up Craig. WE DONE. You don’t even call me or come down, so leave me OUT. Thank you.

  11. Chicago Tony says:

    Not IN My Town
    Maybe you are a big deal in this hole. In my city, Chicago, you are just a dickhead. Goodbye

  12. Westport Lover says:

    You The Man
    All the stories in Westport are mostly true. I saw alot ot this going down. You are interesting. The advice is well taken. I am in my second marriage and soon divorce. I hate to say it, you got a point.

  13. Radio Man says:

    Thats Why Coogan Hates You Glazer
    She will always hate you with stories like this one.

  14. Poor Boy says:

    I’d Hate to be you my friend
    If you didn’t like the calls before. Oh man I’d love to hear them tonight.

  15. Former Girlfriend says:

    Count Me Out
    You can drop your “pen” by one. My mother read this you fucking asshole. You think this is goddamn funny. Fuck. You know who this is and NO I don’t want to be one of a group motherfucking jerk. My mother. I hope all these girls dump your ass, I am. Fuck off.

  16. Ditto says:

    Enjoy Your Dog
    Hope this kinda story was worth it Mister.

  17. Doormat says:

    What were You thinkin?
    Not a wise move. Love the story. Now you will see how many people read this site, hope for your sake not all these gals.

  18. downtown davey says:

    Keeping It Real Man
    This is so much, uh, entertainment. I know you are serious and trying to give advice. Do you even know how God Damn Funny you are? My office is passing this around as we speak. The men love it and the ladies will put your picture on our wall and throw darts. You crazy lunatic. I mean it, they are downloading your photo as I write this. You just passed up OJ,Tiger Woods,Favre,a long list great work.

  19. Unbeliever says:

    Let’s recap, shall we?
    1) First & foremost, relationships are about sex.

  20. Unbeliever says:

    Let’s recap, shall we?
    1) First & foremost, relationships are about sex. 2) Women are to be objectified. 3) Never care personally about a woman, but PRETEND to in order to acheive #1. 4) Women are to be trained like animals: Come-Sex-Leave. You are one f*cked up insecure piece of shit.

  21. MrBrown says:

    Less Trannies/more Fiat
    What’s happening with Hearne’s Fiat?

  22. J.P.Connolly Show says:

    Give Glazer Some Credit
    Its easy to attack someone who has almost no filter on his thoughts. If you look a bit deeper here, not only is this story entertaining, in many ways his feelings tend to be close to the truth. We, as men, do strive to be rich and famous mostly to attract woman. We lie and say for our family, history, the community, but thats mostly apcray. Its for the females. Craig’s just trying to remind us that relationships are tough married or one on one or in this case five or six on one. Game is not easier. In fact harder. I don’t think he is bragging, he is just venting.

  23. Emi says:

    Please,please,please,please,please,please, stop the photo
    How long do you have to run my photo people?! I am married. This photo with Craig is more then one year old. Yes we are kinda friends now, but no I don’t date Craig at this time. I don’t care about the rest of the story, but all I aks is no more photos. It causes me great headache at home. Thank you very much.

  24. Hearne Christopher says:

    Funny you should ask….

    Stand by for an update!

  25. Hearne Christopher says:

    Allow me to suggest that…you nailed it, brother

  26. Orphan of the Road says:

    J.P.Connolly Show for the win
    Add in not having a filter to his writing. Great entertainment but hard on relationships.

    And many of us don’t want to be reminded how much our lives suck. Although I don’t know how much mindless sex a person can take before they get jaded to love.

    Just remember getting old ain’t for sissies.

  27. Dr Doctor says:

    human petri dish
    Nasty human petri dish…..
    Genital warts much? What about genital herpes?
    How about HPV?…… http://www.cdc.gov/hpv/

  28. Rowdy roddy says:

    Love the Story Funny
    Good stuff. You sure can stir it up glazer. Next time, name names.

  29. Cathy says:

    OMG
    I think if girls want this type of lifestyle so be it. If Craig thinks this is a rock stars life, so be it. But there is something to be said for the sanctity of mariage and children and family. It’s all what we choose to live by. There is no right or wrong as long as you are not hurting others. I don’t see that he is, in this case he speaks his truths. Craig seems to think the world of men is about having lots of conquests. Maybe. Depends on the man. Craig and Charlie Sheen are WINNING.

  30. Toco Time says:

    Any Latinos, You like Us?
    I think Maria is a mexican girl, any others?

  31. Kellys man says:

    I Really Hate Your Guts Glazer
    So you have money,cars,hollywierd,girls, what else? Oh yeah a book. Am I suppose to admire you now asswipe? I’d love to beat the crap out of you or Nigro. Hey NIgro you want to evil eye me again like you did a few weeks ago on the lot? Yeah thats me MF. You ain’t bad, your old. Now that Glazer is not down here I can deal with just your old fart ass. He moved to Kansas with the blonde girls.

  32. Elle says:

    No Rest For the Wicked
    What a life Mr. Glazer. Thank you for sharing.

  33. Phil says:

    I think it kind of amusing, but really I kind of feel sorry for him. If anyone has ever been associated with any real “players”, you know that they are generally self assured enough to not feel the need to talk so much, let alone write it down for all to read.. It is interesting that junior is yapping so much, and from what I have seen, this type of blabbing usually does not usually end well, but maybe it will for what his name, good luck with that. At least he can say a lot of people made comments, if that is how one likes to “keep score”.

  34. Markus Aurelius says:

    How insecure can one guy be?
    Craig, I feel sorry for you. I really do. I know you try to make it sound cool (for others or for yourself, I don’t know) but your lifestyle just sounds pathetic. Surely, at times you see it that way too. Two things — either you truly have not found ‘the one’ or you have not yet learned how to be ‘the one.’ Some times people find ‘the one’ and then blow it because they are too selfish, too immature, too jaded, too insecure to carry the other half of the relationship. Your personal life is just that, yours, but when you throw it all out there for public consumption on a blog like this, you lose the ability to complain or be offended by others commenting on or criticizing your life choices.

    For example, what was the point in posting pictures of women you dated in the past? Particularly ones that have made it clear they do not want their picture posted. Why would you think this is kosher? Maybe you took them and own the pictures but still does it boost your ego enough that it’s worth posting despite their requests not to do so? The pictures actually kind of cracked me up. The girls aren’t ugly but they certainly aren’t hot either. I wouldn’t be ashamed to date them but I also wouldn’t be bragging about them based on their looks alone.

    BTW, the Maureen gal OWNED you with her earlier post. Sincerely hope you get it all worked out some day and find someone you can be happy with and that can be happy with you. My wife of 10 years may come to me with the kinds of problems you described but it never seems like a job to me. I love her so much and she loves me that I want to do what it takes to help her when necessary. If it feels like a job it’s because you’re not in love – you’re just having sex. Oh, and by the way, sex gets way better over time, not worse.

  35. chuck says:

    Unfuckinbelievable.
    Kill the horses, burn the bridges and shoot holes in the boat, there is no gong back now.

    Fuck Glazer, that was awesome.

    Jesus, I am gonna re read it all night with Barry White on in the background. Then (Goddamn your an inspiration!), I am gonna walk out into the living room, in front of my ole lady, kick the cat off of the couch, turn off the Fuckin Housewives of whereva and wipe my dick on the curtains!

    Goddamn that was an article to cherish.

    Actually I am not gonna do any of that shit, but jeeze..!!!

    I fuckin love all these chicks weighin in with the expected vitriol and acrimony, perfect. Dude, you are temporarily, RADIOACTIVE!!

    Once, back in the 90s, I was with 2 chicks for about 5 months. I am such a fuckin loser, I of course was in love with both of them. They were both fabulous human beings, fuck I STILL love’em. It was the worse time of my life. I am such a pussy, if I think I am hurting some girl I care about I get physically ill.

    Great pic of Black Barbie, I think they are all pretty cute (Obviously, they are NEVER gonna talk to ya again, but shit, youcan always get some more I guess.).

    This was a fuckin CLASSIC!!

  36. chuck says:

    One more time, just fuckin EPIC!!
    .

  37. harley says:

    IF ANY OF GLAZERS WHORE/GIRLS ARE MAD….F*CK THEM…
    you girls know what you’re getting into so stfu.
    You know the guy loves pussy like dogs love bones.
    You know the guy loves to have hottties around 24/7 like
    dogs on a leash.
    You know he loves the ladies…lots of them.
    SO WHY THE FUCK ARE THESE GIRLS SO UPSET WHEN THEY SEE THEIR PHOTO
    ON THE WORLD WIDE WEB?
    YA MARRIED…then keep your asian ass at home.
    You black stripper…then stay in the clubs working for peanuts and dollar bills..
    MAUREEN: you dated glazer and knew unless the peroxide killed your brain
    cells that he had mutliple partners but still slept with him.
    MAUREEN…..you tell us you’re the hot one at capital grille on thursday…
    buit you sleep around…and you did glaze which means that sleeping with
    him means you’re sleeping/eating the girls he sleeps with and the guys
    who sleep with the girls glaze sleeps with….so don’t act like a deer
    in the headlights you don’t know whats going on.
    GIRL WHO’S MOM READ THIS…GROW THE FUCK UP…HOW OLD ARE YOU.
    IS YOUR MOM HOT? MAYBE GLAZE WANTS A 3 WAY MOTHER DAUGHTER
    SCREWFEST. STOP THE INNOCENT ACT….WHO ARE YOU SLEEPING WITH?
    All you girls act so stupid and innocent….my words…you get in bed with dogs you get
    fleas.
    go glazer….go get them all. Love this story because you’re at the top of your
    game.
    AND ALL YOU GIRLS WHO ACT LIKE YOU DIDN’T KNOW WHAT WAS GOING
    ON WHEN YOU SLEPT WITH GLAZER STFU BECAUSE WE KNOW YOU’RE LYING.
    asian/black barbie/maureen/mermaid/girl next door/the one girls mom…..you’re
    nothing butcheap datesand easy lays.
    NOW…HOW COME NONE OF YOU ARE DOING HEARNE AND THE WRITER WITH
    THE PHONY GERMAN ACCENT.
    ANY OF YOU DOING HALL? MAYBE STEP UP IN LIFE AND GET OUT OF THE
    GUTTERS.
    YOU KNEW WHAT YOU WERE GETTING INTO (BAD PUN) SO STOP THE
    INNOCENT LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD ACT.
    way to go glaze…..show them all who’s the king of stinger!

  38. shecky says:

    here he goes again…
    Craig once again posting comments under different names. Just stop it man, it’s seriously pathetic.

  39. harley says:

    GLAZE….YOU NEED YOUR OWN MORNING RADIO SHOW….
    i’d listen….the whole city would listen….call up hearnes radio insider and get
    it going now. We want this kidn of stuff. The rating would surpass the
    newly dead mike murphy ever dreamed of…come on do it.
    I take back everything i said about (ecept that you know nothing about
    sports)….you are the energizer…you make people get freaking crazy.
    You make sheen look sane…you make hefner look like a virgin….
    and start psoting more pics…
    HOW ABOUT THE INNOCENT GIRL WHO’S MOM READ THIS…NOW THATS
    FUNNY. WONDER WHAT MOM THOUGHT ABOUT HER DARLING LITTLE
    DAUGHTER GETTING “STUNG” BY THE KING OF STING……….
    yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

  40. harley says:

    OKAY…WE’RE GOING TO PASS AROUND THE COLLECTION
    PLATE…
    you surpassed the record comments in just a few short hours…congrats to hearne.
    Now…we’re going to start collecting money on pay pal to get you some new clothes.
    No more funky harold pener leather coats….you’re going in style courtesy of
    the faithful reader (all 10 of us) of kcc…
    now….do me one favor…post a photo of maureen and lets see if shes for real
    orr some white barbie…………….

  41. Hearne Christopher says:

    For the record, Cathy, I know it seems obvious, but a lot of us are playing a far different game. That’s what makes Craig’s story so compelling, I think.

  42. bschloz says:

    Big Love / 100 Comments!!!
    HARLEY WAS RIGHT AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    KCC is born today!

    Chuck….dude !

  43. Hearne Christopher says:

    Editor’s note; let’s review.

    Two of the women complaining have asked Craig out right here in the comments section several times in the past few months/year. Another pleaded with him to let her move into his apartment recently. The others have not weighed in but one of them wrote about going out with him here on KCC.

  44. Mr Wright says:

    Harley is never right, he is an idiot. The only reason he and the other “mu usual suspects” are all giddy about this article is because they are just slap happy to see something (ANYTHING) written that is not about mu looking like the shit hole that mu is.

    not to remind them or anything……. but
    mu is a shit hole it always has been and it always will be.

  45. Hearne Christopher says:

    Ummm, thanks for the plug but no need to steer any of the steerage my way, H Man

  46. Hearne Christopher says:

    Trust me, Shecky. No bogus commentage from Craig here. Think he’s in a bunker somewhere right now riding out the shock and awe.

  47. Matt says:

    I AGREE WITH 3 CORE ISSUES HERE…
    1. Fucking is fun…the more the better.

    2. Nigro is the biggest dick in town and needs his ass kicked.

    3. Most of the here shit is pathetic.

    Out!

  48. Hearne Christopher says:

    Uh, you’re welcome

  49. Hot Rod says:

    Hey Kellysguy
    Are you making threats of physical violence while using a pseudonym? Has to be your ballsiest move to date. What’s next? You gonna shove blind people into traffic? No, as I have stated before, you are an oxygen thieving coward that runs his mouth because he doesn’t like the way his life is going. Do you work at Kellys? Are you a local merchant? A community leader? What is your stake in this? Answer is a blowhard, punkass, jackoff. Btw Rod is my name and I am easily found if you want to threaten me too.

  50. smartman says:

    Sound of Music
    You are 16 going on 17 you don’t know what to do. Craig is 59 going on 60 he’ll buy titties for you. You need someone older and wiser telling you what to do. Craig is 59 going on 60 and he does too.

  51. Doog says:

    Damn.
    Couple of quick comments:
    I envision the words written by Black Barbie with the voice and tenor of Crazy Alice from the Howard Stern Show. Try it.

    Seems to me that some of Craiggers ladyfriends bombarded him all at once with their sob/need stories, and he needed an outlet to vent. But he decided to go one step further and give us something that is truly a must-read.

    This might have been you’re best stuff yet.

  52. chuck says:

    bscloz
    Glazer fell on a the grenade for KCC.

    $50.00 says he is on the phone doin some “splainin”.

    Fuckin great post.

    Its like girls all over the world just “ciphed” the Rosetta Stone, and it ain’t pretty.

  53. chuck says:

    Phoenix from the ashes….
    Glaze, here is what ya do.

    Get engaged to Black Barbie (Who is way hotter than the other chicks.), then post about all the shit that will inevitably go down with upcoming nuptials and a hot black stripper chick.

    I’d buy the book, see the movie, wear the T Shirt and eat the fuckin Ice Cream.

    You lucky fucker.

  54. bschloz says:

    lucky fucker
    Indeed
    Bullpen?…Holy Shit…I’m 52 ready for the john knox already.
    Glaze let it all out part 2 ,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,…forget the Nashville Pitch…run with this!!!
    Forget Sports—- Listen To Harley….New pics! Do Tradeout with Harold Penner’s LOL

    Chuck you need to do one of your knock knock scripts for this …

  55. chuck says:

    Black Barbie, fuckin A!
    Check this post, its fuckin awesome.

    “Leave Me Out of This Thing
    Black Barbie 01:47:52 PM – Tue. Apr 5. 2011

    Why you got to put my picture up Craig. WE DONE. You don’t even call me or come down, so leave me OUT. Thank you.”

    She would be a GOLD MINE of quotes, hilarity and occasional, much needed sobriety and common sense.

    Seriously, if she posted on KCC, and was hooked up with Craig, I could forget my grief over the demise of 2 & 1/2 Men.

    We Be Winnin!

  56. Cliffy says:

    You can delete my comments, Hearne, but you’re still Glazer’s lap dog.

  57. chuck says:

    This is by far the best post in KCC History.
    Check this, from Glaze, with a straight face. NO LAUGHING!!!!!

    “But before the haters unleash themselves, let me say this; when I was in committed relationships I was loyal.”

    Its already a better day.

  58. harley says:

    and we could all pitch in to send black barbie
    back to school…no more stripping…..get a real degree in something like…
    nurses assistant (imagine those big titties giving you a sponge bath)
    airplane material handler (heard southwest is hiring)
    website designer (oh boy…now that would be wild!)
    football player (lots of openings come august)
    female massage therapist (omg….)
    or crime scene investigator or even physical therapist…
    your future would be bright.

  59. chuck says:

    Ok, if you believe this—
    “But before the haters unleash themselves, let me say this; when I was in committed relationships I was loyal.”

    Than you also think OJ cut off Nicole’s head, because she was a “Highlander”.

  60. chuck says:

    Harley, I don’t get the “hate the stripper” stuff.
    The world needs strippers a hell of lot more than they need web site designers.

    Fuck web site designers, South West employees (Get Botello to fis that fuckin roof!), Football players (quit whining about money and get back to fuckin work!) WE NEED MORE STRIPPERS!!!

  61. harley says:

    GLAZERS IDEA OF “COMMITTED RELATIONSHIP”
    1. GIRL DRIVES TO GLAZER BACHELOR PAD
    2. GIRL KNOCKS ON DOOR ( CANT FIGURE OUT HOW TO WORK DOOR BELL)
    3. GIRL KNOCKS ON DOOR AGAIN (thinks doorbell is only for pizza hut delivery man)
    4. GIRL PUTS EAR UP TO DOOR (hears female voice…”what da fuck yous ass puttin my
    damn picture on dat f*cking website again?”)
    5. DOOR BREAKS OPEN. BLACK GIRL RUNS OUT NAKED.
    6. GLAZER PUTS BAD HAIRPIECE BACK ON AND RUNS TO DOOR
    7. GIRL GETS NAKED IN PAD….BENDS DOWN
    8. GLAZER STRAIGHTENS OUT BAD HAIRPIECE AND LAPS THE GIRL.
    9. SE COND GIRL SHOWS UP A BACHELOR PAD.
    this continuies for the entire night…..glazer uses up bullpen by 4am…

    this guys idea of a committed relationship is mcdonald and a bj.
    come on glazer…more photos and details needed…
    where’s maureen already….shes pissed but i’m pretty sure she’s hot in
    the rack…yeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhhhAAAAAAAAAAAA

  62. chuck says:

    Ok, that is funny stuff Harley.
    🙂

  63. chuck says:

    I now declare myself, president of—
    “The Black Barbie Fan Club”

    Herne, please give Black Barbie, hot ass chick that she is, and a STRONG BLACK WOMAN a voice on this blog!

  64. HARLEY says:

    TWO OF GLAZERS HOTTIES WALK BY
    JR (glazer’s dog) and see JR licking his balls.
    One girl says “I wish I could do that!”
    the other girl says “You could…if you petted him real nice!”

    YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

  65. harley says:

    herne…heres the lineup to make kcc explode in views
    1. glazer (have him stick to hotties/sex/playboy
    2. black barbie: she’s a riot…give her own advice column….priceless
    3. Harley: i’ll wake this town up…i got more info on the movers and shakers than
    glazer….and i’ll go undercover
    4. hall: sports….he’s okay…still generates readers
    5. frank boal/jack hairy: let jack write a smack column
    6. wright: ghetto boy can really get peopple worked up
    7. you: you’re getting old and losing touch…maybe back off and
    run the site
    8. chuck: seems funny
    9. smartman: good /great sense of humor…can rip anyone
    10. mike shanin: old….but good for a few good laughs

  66. Hearne Christopher says:

    Woof, woof!

  67. Black Barbie says:

    Don’t Want to Write for the White People and His Hair
    I don’t want to write nothing for you people, less you pay me somethin. Craig hair never comes off, I pulled on it when he was sleeping to see. I think its in permanant he spends lots of his money on the hair, I have a weave and it does come off. I wish he would buy me what he uses, it looks and and real too. It really do. You pay me some good cash and I will write for you all. And give you some good pictures. Call and let me know ok.

  68. Bad Ass Jew, Berkowitz says:

    Heard You on Dare, He Nailed Your Butt to Wall
    I waited all moring for the Johnny Dare show. He did not let me down, he led you right into this trap. The STORY. Wow were you guys beyond funny. Harley is right you should be on every day, somewhere. I wish Johnny would have you on more. I love the comics, but none of them beat you two fuckers. I am a fan. Can’t believe I wrote that.

  69. Kellys man says:

    Hate Nigro/Glazer
    So you want to get a piece of me Bill. I will see you Friday night by the bar you secretly own around 11 PM. Just me and you ok. We don’t have to duke it on, less you want too. I will tell you why I hate you. Glazer you and Dare, so funny glad you think you are so fuckin smart, hope you die from a disease.

  70. Tracy says:

    Harley, aren’t you already undercover?? You were JoJo B4
    And props to you, Mr. Feminist, you DID allow one woman, Black Barbie, in your dream site.
    1 in 10. I don’t think NOW will give you an award, but it’s a start…

    You can reveal as much mover and shaker stuff as you like, and trust me, Hearne will post it.
    Oh I’d love to listen to him scold you during YOUR edits.
    We could sell tickets to those smackdowns.

    And I can arrange for you to meet Craig privately.
    You and chuck and smartman are wonderful commenters.
    Loved smartman’s Sound of Music parody today.

  71. KU Forever says:

    Woke Up To this
    Hearne now maybe I believe you have all those readers or is Glazer such a jerk we all want to hear his bullcrap. Either way you got my attention now. Wheres the KU got beat stories Greg,Craig?

  72. Coo Koo says:

    Glazer You and Sheen
    Glazer call Sheen you maybe could open for him. LOSING!

  73. Better Man says:

    When will it all end
    Hey the story was different. Glazer is like a reality show. Not quite a trainwreck, but a DUI stop. Still he is special. In this city he does stand out. Glazer move to New York see if it works there.

  74. Packers Nation says:

    My God
    This proves it America, Sex sells. More I gues than sports. What a shame.

  75. Man Hater says:

    You Finally Did it? Asshole.
    So now we are the punch line Craig? Here let me help you out bastard. Oh and I don’t give a flying fuck what some of the commentors say or think, you can simply go screw yourself. I got six or seven calls on this stupid article or whatever its called, 9th grade babble. If I see my photo in this group of girls ever you will hear from my family and my lawyer, got it. Good. Have a nice life. NO its not funny. You and your pal Johnny Dare are both assholes.

  76. chuck says:

    Man Hater
    might just have a little burr under her saddle.

    Just give her a little time to cool off, I’m sure she will come around.

    I can see where, right at first, a little knee jerk reaction, and a little anger, but I am sure that after she re reads it a couple of more times, she will begin to see the merit of the post, and even begin to agree with Craig on everything he said in the post.

    I would bet, that later on tonight, Craig’s phone be blowin up (Thanks Black Barbie, much love…) and one of the callers will no doubt be Man Hater.

    Read it a little slower Man Hater, so you can absorb the nuance.

    There ya go!

    Feelin better?

  77. chuck says:

    Black Barbie is killin me.
    Don’t Want to Write for the White People and His Hair
    Black Barbie 11:29:12 AM – Wed. Apr 6. 2011

    I don’t want to write nothing for you people, less you pay me somethin. Craig hair never comes off, I pulled on it when he was sleeping to see. I think its in permanant he spends lots of his money on the hair, I have a weave and it does come off. I wish he would buy me what he uses, it looks and and real too. It really do. You pay me some good cash and I will write for you all. And give you some good pictures. Call and let me know ok.

    “Craig hair never come off, I pulled on it when he was sleeping to see.”

    Priceless. Goddamn that post is funny.

    I have lmao all day on this shit, and it keeps getting funnier.

    Herne, you might really wanna pay her a few bucks, you can’ make that shit up, she is hilarious.

  78. Holli says:

    WOW
    Craigs a good guy, just wants to look like a “Bad Ass” But what this story tells is that he is just a “washed up play boy”

    Is it because I wouldn’t let you near my vagina w/a 10 foot pole that you are so angry Craig? I know you wanted more… but I believe I made it very clear from the start I was in no place for a relationship.

    As for the calls. You, Mr. Glazier would call me 5-10times a day not including texts, so who’s the player here?? As a matter of fact before reading this just now, I have received 10 texts from you one minute hating me and the next missing me all since 11AM this morning hmmmmm?

    As I said before you are a great person, I feel responsible for this rant…. as I would, and could not give you what you needed from me. So sorry to all you ladies out there, but the reason behind this is that for once in Glazer’s life he couldn’t get the girl.

    In ending, I want to thank you Craig for showing me a world that I had not ever seen. And a big thanks to the staff at Stanfords, you are all kind, attentive and fun to be around!

    Too bad our friendship has to end so nasty….. i guess I didn’t realize you were so hurt by my not loving you the way you wanted me too.

    Wishing you the best Craig, truely.

  79. Craig Glazer says:

    Sorry you feel that way
    Washed up playboy? You mean like Brad Pitt, Johnny Depp and Charlie Sheen? Winning!

  80. Rainbow Man says:

    KC Confidential has morphed into KC Esquire
    It is like a men’s movement. This is one of those classic Glazer posts that we married 40 somethings read with a fervor. KC Confidential: Sports and Glazer…. Classic… Throw in a little culture… And we have something men are starving for in the media. Hearne… your audience is the forgotten race… The 30-50 year old male… busting his nads… paying… earning… and just looking for some inspiration.

  81. Don't want to write for the white people and his hair. says:

    Fuckin awesome.
    it really do.

  82. Jar Head says:

    Brad Pitt, Johnny Depp and Charlie Sheen? LOL!!!!
    No, you look more like the gungan leader, gotta admit the similatiry is there….
    http://timbailey.files.wordpress.com/2008/05/boss-nass.jpg

  83. harley says:

    glazer..you slept with that black stripper?
    thats gross…hope you wore a condom….and what do the other high class ladies
    you pork have to say. Hope they get check at the free clinic for hiv.
    what a riot….
    wheres maureens picture…and the girl you chased with 10 test..
    I sed a pattern here….the photos show you slobbering on the girls and they’re
    trying to push you away.
    you’re pushing yourslf on maria and the blonde girl…..the stripper hos look like
    regular party pics…
    do these girls think you’re creepy….it seems they think you’re weird cling on.
    Maybe ….but its still funny to see these ho’s react..
    and mermaid… heard she’s on match.com now…. couldnt you put her away or
    finish them off…
    you’re a walking commercial for hair club for men and viagra.
    good luck…hope to hear more stories.

  84. bschloz says:

    New Employment Opps!
    “fucking every night becomes a job”
    I think there is a name for this

  85. harley says:

    changed my attitude on glazer
    after further analysis…i’m starting to wonder if there’s something wrong with
    this guy.
    One of his “hos” said no to him…now that’s classic…i thought all these girls worked
    for money. Afterv10 texts she still said no…must have had a higher paying customer
    waiting on the plaza to womp her.
    iS THIS GUY A STALKER…from the post just observed it appears he is.
    And I heard from insiders at the woodside pool that girls are thinking this guy
    is creepy.
    And the photos show that some of these girls are not really excited about him
    putting his body rightvnext to theirs…
    lets hear from more girls about this guy.
    I loved the article..loved the responses but now the other side is coming out
    and hearne wants no part of this whole thing.
    Hopefully we’ll get more reports from other women who have see n another
    side to this guy.
    its cool he write this stuff but also very dangerous. These girls are banging other
    guys at the same time so its not a “committed” relationship as glazeer would say.
    somethings being left out…i wonder

  86. Joe Cornia says:

    I Know The Truth Here
    I’m a comic, I do work at Stanfords often. I know Craig and his brothers very well. To be honest, and I dont need to this for work cause I work a hundred other places, they are pretty good guys. I have seen Craig in action for a couple decades now. TRUST ME HE NEEDS NO HELP WITH THE LADIES, NEVER DID. Someone mentioned the photos, I don’t know all these girls, but I have met some here, I saw them calling and driving him nuts not the other way around. It doesn’t matter his age, the guys a sex symbol in this town. Period, had been for years. Its just more public now, thats all. I don’t think he should have writtent this, it will only bring the guy some headaches, but thats his call.

    Craig I gotta tell this story, sorry. My favorite Stanfords glimpse was when Pauly Shore first worked Westport in the late 90’s, say 98/99. He and Glazer hit it off right away. I was there that week, I thing opening the shows. Sold out, packed, lots of energy, lines, great atmosphere. I never ever saw so many gorgeous woman show up anywhere. Like over 50 a night, 8’s,9’s, and a couple 10’s. Pauly and Craig had a limo for after the show antiques. When Shores last show ended Friday he went to Glazers office and like almost interviewed this line of pretty young ladies. Like 20, the limo only held around ten people. Pauley also had a bodyguard and raod manager with him. Craig had a smokin hot babe date, I think it was their first or second date. In the end the limo was filled with hot girls all around 20 to 25 tops(years old). Craig came back to the club at close and was pissed, he told me, “Joe, can you believe it shore had all those girls on him and wanted to be with my date, the selfish prick invited her back to his hotel for a “party” and she asked me if it was ok to go!” I let her go be with the guy.” It was kinda funny at the time. Sorry Craig, you usually got the girl, not that time.

    Great story and man is it true words spoken.

  87. Dean Boese says:

    Craig hire an intern…
    Craig, you absolutely have to hire an intern with a camera to follow you around and record your every movement…Bravo would buy that in a heart beat! You, Craig, put yourself up to be crucified…and probably got laid the very same night! Epic Win!

  88. Bad Ass Jew, Berkowitz says:

    Harley I knew the true hater in you would show up
    I love you Harley. As the comments kept coming you went from a WOW Glazer is cool, I was wrong to he’s a stalker and its all smoke and mirrors. Lepords don’t change their stripes. As somebody else wrote, the guy is a KC Sex Symbol my friend. About that I see no argument. Yeah he’s in his 50’s and one thing I thought was clear in this photos, the guy, and I’m not gay, is handsome and in shape. We should all be so f”d up Harley. Hey Harley maybe you could write that Glazer is really a girl, or a fag or both. You do have inside scoop.

  89. craig glazer says:

    If These Walls Could Talk
    Wow, didn’t expect all those responses. Some good, some well you know how it goes. You just can’t please everyone. I mentioned no names, Hearne puts in the photos he wants not me. All I can say to some of this is I could have gone much deeper. These stories are just to give advice and let the reader take a peek at another side of life. If it bothered some girls who I have dated now or in the past, again I mentioned no names, so it is not about you perse. Thanks for all the comments. I will continue to try and entertain as well as educate. Its all food for thought.

  90. Big Brother says:

    I Agree With Chuck And Bshlotz
    Craig Glazer you are wasting your talent in this town. I hear you on radio once in a while. You have voice and stories and well its quite interesting. I like that you are not “PC”, one of your best interviews I heard was on KMBZ about the Urban problem. You hit on the hear and nobody else would tell the truth, you did. Sometimes you go too far, but more I think about it, you might be correct. Really enjoyed this ride. These comments are well…priceless.

  91. Hearne Christopher says:

    I would take that post with a pretty huge grain of salt, H Man

  92. Hearne Christopher says:

    Bingo, you nailed it

  93. harley says:

    My story
    I’ve partied in vegas many many times. Was at the palms. Knew the maloufs from business since they were
    the biggest shareholders in wells fargo. Stayed at the palms for the weekend. Worked the pool
    like noones business. It was filled with hot chicks. I had a good friend who ran the bar area downstairs
    and knew for many years the manager of rain.
    a good friend who worked in vegas as cfo of a major hotel came by and we went upstairs to the
    skyboxs and partied. another long time friend had an escort service and regularly found
    “dates’ for tiger and yang from yahoo. She came in with Pauly Shore.
    Never met the guy…i heard his name from watching mtv…knew his parents had owned a
    comedy club but besides that didn’t think he was much. but the ladies loved him…..jew boy
    knew how to work the crowd.
    We talked briefly then went into one of the skyboxes that had been reserved for a party.
    In came about 10 of the hottest hookers in vegas. One was named “Char”….spent 5 years
    in juinor college (real genius here) but she was hot. Pauly went after her but i had seen her
    at the pool earlier and we had taked. One of the other girls just returned from a week in
    cannes with some rich old guy. anyway, pauly was after char bad…but she couldn’t stand
    the guy. Next thing the girls are sucking each other tits.
    I had 2 managers who worked for me in the skybox and I knew i wanted char.
    So i walked over…started talking to her…we went down the long stairway
    to the dance area in rain and danced for about 20 minutes. she said she couldnt
    stand pauly…so next thing i’m getting a hummer in my suite.
    So pauly doesnt alwasy get the puss…he lost this one. Maybe next time you need
    a wingman glazer call me. Or you should be afraid i’ll steal these girls from you.
    That was back in 2006 after i sold my company for lots of money.
    Now…i’m settled down…have one great girl which is better than having 20 bimbo
    hos you have to chase around town and text and beg.
    Thats my claim to playboy fame…but found that one great one is better than
    all the hot women in the world.
    Maybe heare and glaze will find it. I doubt it…he’s like a dog in heat.
    Every town has people like glaze….you see them sleep with different hos each
    night. and you realize that deep down they’re very lonely people.
    Life is strange…hope hearne and glazer find their match…but you both better hurry…
    father time isn’t going to keep you for long.
    Great stories for us guys to live vicariously thru…but still sad that you both live
    empty lives. I did it…it was fun…but life changesyou
    Hope everyone has smiled and enjoyed my posts….they’re not meant to
    make anyone mad…just to get under a few peoples skin.
    and remember…HARLEY IS ALWASY RIGHT.

  94. bschloz says:

    “Texting and Begging”
    Isn’t that what all Jewish Men do?

  95. Stella says:

    And?
    Craig is who he is. He doesn’t pretend to be anyone else but Craig. With the entertainment industry comes a seedier side of life that some dive right into and some do not. I don’t buy for one minute that any of Craig’s girlfriends are shocked at this article. How can you have dated this man and then be so shocked that he has laid everything out on the kitchen table for all to see?
    Craig is who he is, he is who he always will be, until he isn’t.

  96. Hearne Christopher says:

    How about almost always right? What makes you think I’m traveling the same course (or even a similar one) as Craig? Uh, I’m not. But thanks for thinking of me.

  97. Hearne Christopher says:

    Don’t take that fairytale Holli wrote in the comments section too seriously, guys. I don’t doubt that Craig was doing plenty of damage control yesterday but the part about the 10-foot pole was preposterous

  98. HARLEY says:

    Best wishes to glaze and hearne
    I know i pile the heat on you guys…but i think it be a blast to party with you
    two for just onenight….i’m yonger than glaze but i don’t think i could handle
    all the excitement that revolves around you guys.
    Glaze…that blonde in the photo look really sweet. What happened?
    Been down the road you two guys have been…did theparties….worked
    the girls…but someday yu wake up and realize you’re alone…i know
    the feelling.
    Heanre you went thru a divorce and we know what that does to a guys
    head. Hope things are playing out well for you. If you hang with glaze
    you shouldnt have any problems with the ladies.
    Andglaze….when the hell is bobby slayton coming down? Book this
    guy…i’ll buy you aznd the family a drink.
    i wish you both as the jews say “mazel tov” on your exploits and hope
    everything works out for both of you.
    Despite my badgering…i still got to meet you two out for drinks at happy
    hour sometime….although i can’t keep tabs of all your ladies…it would
    be fun to see how pimps like you work in this new decade.
    Obviously things have changed…and all the ladies are looking to get
    laid….so god luck and remember to protect yourselves at all times…
    you don’t know where these girls have been before.
    Have fun….and keep writing the good stories…
    no more fiat stories for god sakes..
    you know what your readers want so stay focused…..
    your longtime friend
    Harley…..

  99. Roric says:

    I work with The Glazer
    He is a client of mine in entertainment. Awesome.

  100. jimmyd says:

    I’m pretty sure
    Bobby Slatyon is dead. It’s funny when all someone does is make fun of your hair, your girls, DUI problems, sports knowledge, etc. is now practially begging to go out with you guys. Just a complete moron

  101. Pissed Off says:

    I wanted to be number 100!
    Hearne and Glazer well congratulations, one hundred comments. Biggest ever. I place comments on Fox and other sites, even some national stories don’t get this many Hearne. Hey I am not a Craig Glazer fan, but nothing for nothing, I will agree he is a somebody in this town and not afraid to put it out there. I don’t like his views on religon or the plight of our black brothers, however Craig is entitled to his opinions, God knows he will share them.

  102. Lindie says:

    What a complete idiot!
    Hey Harley I have a new name for you- DOUCHEBAG! Hearne and Glazer aren’t doing anything with you EVER! Your blogs contradict themselves every other time.Y ou must be bi-polar because you can’t keep track of what you really believe. Stick being a hater because when you mush up to Hearne and Craig you sound like a fag. Believe me those two aren’t getting girls like you think they are- trust me I know. And when they do for two minutes they get DUMPED. Get it. Craig Glazer is a mirage and a magician. He has nothing going on. He lies and tells big fabricated stories just to make you think he is somebody. He’s smart about a few things but after that the guy is a little stupid. And the girls- the only girls he ever gets are strippers or white trash (he married one). Craig is a storyteller and that is all. So get over it.

  103. harley says:

    lindie…
    honey…you’ve got some real pent up problems…maybe try that new
    vibrator you bought at cicillas……it will work wonders and
    make you feel better about yourself. If not….give glazer a call..
    I’m sure he’d loeve to pork you…but maybe not….because
    then he’d have to pay you to leave!

  104. MU Fan says:

    Glazer Take Barbie Back
    That black girl is one of the finest I’ve ever seen. I looked at her facebook photos, wow. the one here is just ok, but her others, damn. get her back.

  105. Terri Springer says:

    Seriously? You’re still alive?
    Dude,

    I thought you had died out by now.

  106. Maureen says:

    Craig is Like Dorian Grey
    Die out, Not likely, he’s got the oil painting down in the basement that never ages. Its kinda cool though.

  107. Professional Hater says:

    Died Out! Nah Just starting
    Boy this is hard to swallow but, Glazer and Johnny Dare are now by far our cities biggerst male sex symbols, we have no athlete as well known yet. Tony G was the man but he’s gone. Two guys over 40, one over 50, ah like Nicholson and Pitt I guess. Boy do I hate those two fuckers. You hear more about them now than ten years ago.

  108. Radio Man says:

    RockFest Helps
    Hey pro hater, get your Rockfest tickets now. Dare gets more than 50,000 fans to show up and the girls are often amazing.

  109. Kellys man says:

    Keeping Up the Big Dog
    Hearne you are so proud of asshole Glazer that you keep his story up hoping for 200 comments? He won’t look so cool when I kick his butt in Westport Friday night. Bill won’t show maybe Glazer will. Bet he sicks one of his gals on me.

  110. Former Girlfriend says:

    Time to Take This Down Boys
    This must be a guy thing. Enough already with the sex and glazer and his f..ing stupid dog.

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