Starbeams:Top 5 signs it’s really cold; KC economy and looming football strike totally suck

TOP 5 SIGNS IT’S REALLY COLD IN KANSAS CITY:

#5.  Considering traveling to Egypt to warm up over a burning car…
 
#4.  A bum on the plaza asked for a quarter for a downpayment on an Amish Furnace…
 
#3.  Can hardly wait for the 26th consecutive rebuilding season for the Royals…
 
#2.  The Hare Krishnas on the plaza are singing Ice Ice Baby…

#1.  Nikita has applied for a gig at the Miami Zoo.

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I’m trying to figure a way to get  the Westboro Baptist Church to join the protests in Egypt.

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A new survey shows the Kansas City economy was hit harder in 2010 than every city except for Sacramento, California. We lost 1.9 percent of jobs and Sacramento lost 2.2 percent. The economy is like your married sex life…you have to keep telling yourself it will get better.

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I can hardly wait for Super Bowl weekend because after the game the players will gather to determine if they will strike.

If there’s anything this nation needs now, it’s a chance to watch millionaires beg for money.

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