STARBEAMS: Outerspace Sex and Festering Sores

 Recent research from the University of Kansas Medical Center indicates that conceiving in outer space is close to impossible.

Sperm counts drop and ovaries don’t work.

Instead, scientists recommend that female astronauts should consider having sex with me because it’s OUT OF THIS WORLD!


A Long Island, NY church exposed about 1,300 churchgoers to Hepatitis A at Christmas Mass when they consumed communion wafers. Turned out that the priest handing them out had Hepatitis.

The name of the church should’ve given it away – Our Lady of the Festering Hepatitis Sore.

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