Hearne: The Next Ellen Degeneres, This Week at Stanford’s

It’s not like Stanford & Sons main man Craig Glazer never makes any over-the-top claims…

Far from it.

It’s a well known fact that the King of Sting is also the King of Verbal Bling. But as one of the chief inhalers of Glazer’s daily smoke blowing, I can attest to the following:

When it comes to hyping and assessing comics, Glazer tells it like it is. For better and for worse. So when he urges me not to miss Iliza Shlesinger – the winner of Last Comic Standing – I take him at his word.

"She’s a don’t miss, yeah," Glazer says. "This is a girl that in a couple years will be playing the Midland. She’s the best female comic I’ve seen since Ellen. "She’s very high energy but observational. Most of the other female comics do a lot of jokes about what it’s like to be a woman instead of a man. How men are bad in bed. And dick size is a constant joke and how men have to drive Ferraris to compensate. You know, more woman versus man."

Shlesinger’s schtick?

"The word is observational, which is what Ellen is," Glazer says. "Which is what Seinfeld is. Which is what Lewis Black is. With this girl it’s stuff like, how important is college? And like she hasn’t been sleeping well at night because there are pigeons outside her apartment making love. Then she says, have you ever heard pigeons mate? Then she makes this really disturbing sound."

The worst thing Glazer can say about Shlesinger?

"She’s guilty of one LA thing," Glazer says. "She travels with her dog in a bag, a la Paris Hilton. "

Time to lay it down. Shlesinger’s comedy club rating on a scale of one to 10?

"Well, for talent, I think she’s going to be a 10. Right now, I’d give her a 9. I mean, the talent is reserved more experienced comics like Ellen."

 

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11 Responses to Hearne: The Next Ellen Degeneres, This Week at Stanford’s

  1. harley says:

    glazer…..saw her on tv…
    she is very good. I just discovered last comic standing this year
    and found it an excellent show. amid all the cable shit and the
    drawn out drama and the fake reality shows…this show made
    me laugh.
    whens slayton coming back? And we need to get lewis blac k back
    in town too. If you missed his "nanny state" sketch from the jon
    stewart show several weeks ago..it was the funniest skit he’s
    ever done. I’m sure you can get on youtube…gotta seeit…the
    guy is a freaking riot!

  2. harley says:

    oh…one more thing…
    GLAZER…KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF THIS HOTTIE.
    REMEMBER…YOU NEVER STICK YOUR PEN IN THE COMPANY INK
    WELL……….

  3. harley says:

    we all know how you
    like to take on the hotties in town!

  4. bschloz says:

    Weekend
    I’ll be there. This one’s a Star.

  5. Kerouac says:

    Yes, but is she really good/funny
    or just silly/over-hyped like the chiefs? If the measure be the viability W/L record the one & chest heaves the other, breaths have it…

  6. craig glazer says:

    good as it gets these days
    Iliza fended off all my advances, so far! In fact her Hockey player boyfriend flew in last night. So that ended that. Nah, she is a sweet young lady with large talent. Its tough on female comics all the time. Illiza stands out for sure. Wow, nice photo Hearne.

  7. bschloz says:

    funnyfunny
    Kerouac…I know its 5 0’clock somewhere….but I have know Idea what your talking about? Yes she is funny funny….and clearly not hard to look at….she recieved 70 bellylaughs vs. an always tough Weds night KCK crowd…Thurs. she killed with 120 LOL’s but attributted it to more drinks being served!…….lighteb K this is ART open up the wallet and throw a few bucks at Stanfords….I guarantee laughs!

  8. craig glazer says:

    where you at stanfords bshloz?
    Wow you were there both nights? Now I want to really know who you are. Glad you liked her.

  9. bschloz says:

    Sat.
    No…Just giving Kerouac a little trouble….planning on being there Sat. night…. date night……
    Thanks Craig

  10. harley says:

    I’m headed there 2noite
    and i expect front row seats for this hottie….
    hey…if you have any trouble with the hockey player boyfriend…
    me and bschloz will be rightbehind you…picking you up
    after he slap shots ya.
    Just kidding…but keep trying to hit on her. Use all those lines you
    used in the 80’s and 90’d…like

    ‘WHATS YOUR SIGN"
    WANT TO COME BACK TO MY PAD FOR SOME COOCHIE
    DID I EVER SHOW YOU MY BACKSTAGE
    OR YOU REALLY NEED TO HANDLE "MY" MIKE
    LIGHTS…CAMERA….ACTION!
    I WILL RESPECT YOU IN THE MORNING…BUT TONIGHT YOU
    NEED TO BRING DOWN THE HOUSE…
    THAT HOCKEY PLAYER AINT GOT NOTHING ON ME…IS HE
    THE STAR OF A BLOCKBUSTER MOVIE…DOES HE HAVE HIS
    BOOK OUT IN HARD BACK?

    COME ON GLAZER… WE’RE COUNTING ON THE HOMEWTOWN BOY
    TO GET THIS DONE…
    SEE YA TONITE….WILL YOU BUY ME A DRINK FOR ALL THE TIMES
    I’VE HAD TO DEFEND YOU ON THIS BLOG!

  11. harley says:

    RIGHT……………
    GLAZER: " SHE’S A SWEET YOUNG LADY WITH BIG TALENT!"……….
    FROM THE LOOKS OF THE PIC HEARNE POSTED OF HER…THAT’S NOT
    ALL THATS BIG!
    i’ll be in 2nite and you’ll see my girls big tatas….just another masterpiece
    by the mammary master himself…dr. dan bortnick!

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