Tony: Kansas City Drops The Hatchet For The Holidays!!!

Everybody is being way too nice to each other around this dump of a cowtown and I don’t really understand it.

Because I’ve hooked up with Hearne’s blog and made a few inroads of my own, I was lucky enough to receive quite a few Happy Thanksgiving calls today. As always, I was waiting for the other shoe to drop and wondering if I was just being distracted while immigration officials moved into place.

I was wrong. It turns out people in Kansas City politics really can be nice.

Kansas City political expert Patrick Tuohey explains the phenomenon.

“It’s common practice for The White House along with members of the House and Senate to send out Holiday cards and extend an olive branch,” Tuohey said. “Of course they send ‘Happy Thanksgiving’ messages to people they’ve disagreed with in the past. It’s really not a big deal.”

Tuohey knows what he’s talking about given that he worked in Washington, D.C. under the guidance of the infamous GOP pollster Frank Luntz. He is also the force behind The Missouri Record, a centre-right online opinion journal that has started to make some serious waves in the world of Show-Me State Politics.

Still, I’m always waiting for something bad to happen and it takes more convincing than that to make me abandon my cynicism.

Similarly, my sources at City Hall tell me that this afternoon Mayor Funkhouser and Interim City Manager Troy Schulte were prancing around together handing out invitations to The Mayor’s X-mas Tree lighting at Crown Center. It’s a nice PR move for a good cause: But I heard that the Mayor was actually forcing a smile.

While he has reason to be happy, I’ve never seen the dour dude crack a grin for more than 3 seconds. And he doesn’t really have reason to when speaking with the local Latino Community. However, folks that I’m talking to around City Hall say that Schulte and Funkhouser could almost have been described as giddy.

So, maybe there is something to all this holiday cheer. But I can’t help but think that so many politicos wishing the best to their constituents with holiday wishes is a ruse and a brief distraction while another mischievous plot is in the works.

By the way, Happy Thanksgiving D-bags.

Tony Botello
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5 Responses to Tony: Kansas City Drops The Hatchet For The Holidays!!!

  1. Anonymous says:


  2. Anonymous says:

    you’re a hack

  3. Anonymous says:

    The Mayor is a nice guy if you get to know him Tony. But given your constant abuse of him and his family I doubt you’ll be lucky enough to get the chance.

    It really is your loss.

  4. Anonymous says:

    Orphan of the Road
    Thanks for pissing in the corn flakes of so many politicos and poseurs in in CowTown.

    Cream in your coffee (eeew)

  5. Anonymous says:

    Incoherent. Awkward phrasing. Transition sentences non-existent. These are some things you have to be thankful for, Tony.

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