Tony: Kansas City Improv Comedy Isn’t Funny, Especially on the Internet

There’s a good chance that any extended stay in Kansas City will present the opportunity to check out one of many local improv comedy groups.

My only advice: STAY AWAY!!!

After the jump there’s a bit of news about new online local improv comedy developments but I thought it was worth remembering: My hatred of local improv comedy stems from a couple of years ago when I checked out one of them still doing Clinton jokes and Scottish accents. Those cretins took me for $37, and were probably the impetus for a breakup with a broad I had yet to bang, SOOOOO I’m obviously one of the foremost experts on local improv (or at least its criticism) in the KC area. More importantly, I consider myself an authority on broken dreams in this cowtown, and I can say without question that there is nothing more unfunny than a liberal arts major on stage bravely undertaking a last ditch effort to avoid real work.

Of course there are exceptions to this rule (not really), but I can note with a great deal of confidence that every comedy improv group in Kansas City is comprised of people who are completely untalented and unfunny.

I’ll have to ask Hearne to ask Craig Glazer but I’m pretty confident the only thing that generates laughs at these improv shows is either family ties or booze.

Unfortunately, all of my cynicism won’t stop many local dudes (and a few EXTREMELY plain looking women) from hoping, wishing and trying to be the next local version of Jason Sudeikis – The SNL Star from Overland Park, Kansas – who now earns a few bit parts in movies and has created one mildly amusing character on Saturday Night Live. As far as local comedy enthusiasts go, the dorks who take improv seriously burst into spontaneous orgasm whenever the guy mentions anything related to the Kansas City area, and (at least at this) I have to chuckle because the TV star is probably ruining more lives than he could ever imagine.

In any event, I guess it’s important to be fair to the assorted groups of people who murder all things funny on a regular basis in Kansas City. In an attempt to spread their mediocrity even further these groups have taken to the Internet with a vengeance. The Kansas City Improv Blog is about as hilarious as hearing the word “metastasize,” but they’ve been updating regularly for years.

And back by unpopular demand has a new blog, forum and calender wherein local improv comedy creeps can lament that local audiences “just don’t get it.”

My guess is that the failure of local improv comedy dorks has been exacerbated by the far funnier “real” people on Youtube and all over the Internet who don’t need a group therapy session, 2 drink minimum and dank converted warehouse to tell a joke. Sadly, my fear is that online comedy efforts from the masses only represent that latest manifestation of the horrible human instinct which drives us to believe that the ability to tell a joke is the least bit noteworthy.
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24 Responses to Tony: Kansas City Improv Comedy Isn’t Funny, Especially on the Internet

  1. Anonymous says:

    kansas city improv
    Thanks for linking to everything!

  2. Anonymous says:

    Note that he’s really quick to moan but has no offer of how to fix it… because it ain’t broken! He laments the loss of $37 because he knows writing tripe like this isn’t going to get him anywhere other than where he is: carrying a bucket for others to urinate in.

  3. Anonymous says:

    The fact that you link Craig Glazer to improv comedy just shows how ignorant you are on the subject.

  4. Anonymous says:

    And attacking the physical appearance of the players is just wrong. Not everyone can be a bikini model that you have to use to lure people to reading your ignorant blog. I may be EXTREMELY plain looking, but I’m funny, smart, gainfully employed and married.

  5. Anonymous says:

    This is just so hard for me to understand. Their are huge stories waiting to be told. Especially as the Star becomes smaller and smaller. Opportunities are galore. Chances to tell interesting and impactful stories. Give complete book, movie, restaurant, entertainment reviews. Break ground. Hey, why doesn’t anyone ever review a church-is it easily understandable to a non believer, music good, churches always say they are friendly but seldom really are, what improvements would a non believer make? Just a wealth of potential stories out there. But instead we get things like this. PLEASE………give this space to someone that will use it. So much wasted potential.

  6. Anonymous says:

    The fact that you mention a 2 drink minimum is required is proof that you aren’t actually talking about improv troupes. I know if no troupe in KC that requires any purchases besides that of a ticket.

  7. Anonymous says:

    Hey Rick (and anyone else)
    If you are looking for a church and can’t find one that is friendly, check out Covenant Presbyterian Church, 5931 Swope Parkway, KCMO 64130. We’re a friendly, radically inclusive, racially progressive congregation dedicated to social justice.

  8. Anonymous says:

    Paul I will absolute check you out. But my question to you is after I check you out will you be willing to hear/read my comments. I can send something to the church and put attention Paul. Three quick stories.

    *Went to a ministry convention several years ago. It was held at a Baptist college. The topic was servant evangelism. I went because at the time I was off of work due to a broken leg. It was snowing. I was on crutches. I’ll never forget that not one of these pastors that were being taught to “love others” ever offered to open a door for me, get my tray for lunch etc as I hobbled around.

    *Thom Rainer is a famous author who writes about churches and church growth. A local church got high marks from him. Won’t go into details but I checked the church out and I was stunned at how unfriendly it was. And just by coincidence it turned out Mr Rainer was speaking that weekend. Lots of delusion there based on my experience.

    *Finally, two weeks ago I checked out a church in Blue Springs. Huge church with many services. Stupid me locked my keys in my car. The message was about loving strangers. Sooooo do u think any of these Godly people helped me with my situation? At this point do you even have to ask? I met Christ that Sunday but he was in the form of a Blue Springs police officer, after church member after church member drove by me.

    So understand Paul that I will give you an honest appraisal.

  9. Anonymous says:

    I/we are ready for you, Rick. Better make that correspondence read “Paul B” just to make sure.

  10. Anonymous says:

    If you are going to make fun of something, especially a type of comedy, please make sure that it is actually funny.

  11. Anonymous says:

    Fuck the Improv Groups. There are very few comedians that are funny.

    Keep this shit up Tony. You break the balls you wanna break.

    Rick, if you’re looking for some spirituality that will challenge your mind, body and soul read god is not Great by Christopher Hitchens and then What’s so great about Christianity by Dinesh D’Souza back to back. You won’t get that kind of learning in any church. Also, Peter Gomes the Divinity Professor at Harvard has a couple of books out where he puts a modern day spin on a years worth of Gospel readings. Really good stuff. As DL Hughley said, “I believe in God. I just don’t believe all these guys that say they work for him.”

  12. Anonymous says:

    craig glazer
    Well Tony, just mention my name and all my fans jump right in…I always love how “what does he know” stuff always jumps in…but in a funny way in this case they are somewhat right…I don’t have anything to do with Improv stuff here…meaning this type of comedy….I have seen it, been in it, but have not been to this theatre…other than to look at it from the outside…so to be fair, I don’t know how it is…I have heard some good things at times, each show is different so like anything else it depends on what show and what night you come…I give them credit for being around a long fact outside of Stanfords longer than any other comedy venue…so thats a plus…..

  13. Anonymous says:

    So the question arises. Craig why not any improv at your place?

    Will do Paul give me 4-6 weeks. Thanks for your openness.

    Smartman thanks for the recommendations. Now two of my own. Under the Overpass which is about two college age guys that take a guitar and travel the country going to churches while sleeping at shelters and under the overpass. And Jim and Casper Go To Church about an atheist and a pastor that visit churches together. Loved the DL quote.

  14. Anonymous says:

    Comedy Fan
    Hey Craig?
    I’m still waiting…..

  15. Anonymous says:

    craig glazer
    Comedy Fan, Hearne cannot give out your email address to me, he must keep those private,however I have not forgotten please call my office at 913 400 7500 be comedy fan and ask for me and I will take care of your needs and get you what I said I would ok?

  16. Anonymous says:

    Craig, is Stanfords still the best place to purchase cocaine?

  17. Anonymous says:

    Jared have u kept the weight off with those Subway sandwiches?

  18. Anonymous says:

    The weight is off, but it’s been no picnic. The urge to keep eating haunts me daily. Luckily I’ve been extra busy lately teaching Michael Strahan how to act.

  19. Anonymous says:

    Keep up the work he needs it. I’ve heard they are playing the show Brothers at Leavenworth as punishment for the inmates.

  20. Anonymous says:

    And while they spend time in the hole, they are given nothing more than a laptop and a direct feed to this site.

  21. Anonymous says:

    Give ’em hell, Tony!

    Also, plays are bad! I saw one two years ago and it sucked! They took me for $137! Don’t go! And no one should try acting!

    Also, all female poets have gnarly feet!

  22. Anonymous says:

    Tony, I would love to fight you. No kidding. You name the time and place. Even if you totally destroy me, it would be worth it to get at least one punch in on a totally underinformed, talking out of his rear end, piece of crap writer that you are.

  23. Anonymous says:

    Of course, when I say fight, I mean that we should mount the shoulders of some of the extreeeemely plain looking women (whatver) with gobs of unappreciated talent (interpret that however you will) and partake in some sort of improvised melee in which we throw life size replicas of the Statue of Liberty made from earwax at each other until the first one falls.

  24. Anonymous says:

    Tony: Once Again An SNL D-Bag Will Give Kansas City Improv G
    […] gets worse: We’ve already discussed that Kansas City Improv isn’t funny and it’s really kind o… Well, this appearance will undoubtedly inspire all of the local comedy geeks to reach for the stars […]

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